Modern Family Quotes

Modern Family

Modern Family

Modern Family is a mockumentary that follows the extended Pritchett family with three diverse households that show what it means to be a modern family.

Starring: Ed O'Neill, Sofia Vergara, Julie Bowen, Ty Burrell, Jesse Tyler Ferguson, Eric Stonestreet, Sarah Hyland, Ariel Winter, Nolan Gould, Rico Rodriguez, Aubrey Anderson-Emmons, Jeremy Maguire, Reid Ewing.
Original Run: 2009-.

Quote of the Day

Monday, August 10, 2020

Quote from Jay in Kids These Days

Jay: I hate losing to a team with a Viking mascot. Hey, you died out and became Swedes! Hip-hip-hooray for socialism and seasonal depression!

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Quote from Phil in Come Fly with Me

Phil: He's a little jumpy.
Claire: Oh, go figure. A teenage boy doesn't want to hang out with his girlfriend's dad.
Phil: I thought we were past all that. I'm all about taking it to the next level.
Claire: Really? I thought you were all about keeping it real.
Phil: Yes, but the whole point of keeping it real is so you can take it to the next level. Did you really not know that?

Quote from Manny in Larry's Wife

Jay: It's a movie. New York, '70s, Charles Bronson's a firm family man, and he-
Manny: Who's pushed to the limit until one day he decides to fight back.
Jay: You've seen it?
Manny: It's called "Death Wish." I doubt it ends with him trading banter in an apartment with Marsha Mason.

Quote from Lily in Suddenly, Last Summer

Lily: What if he never comes back?
Jay: Oh, honey, no one ever leaves home and doesn't come back.
Lily: I did.

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Quote from Claire in Regrets Only

Phil: All right. What looks good?
Claire: Oh, gosh.
Phil: Ooh, here's something that jumps right off the page.
Claire: Uh-huh.
Phil: I tried this yesterday, thanks to my good friend Skip Woosnum. Claire, do yourself a favor and join me in a wedge salad.
Claire: You have got to be kidding me!
Phil: Just try it. You will thank me.
Claire: Did you learn nothing from last night?
Alex: Whoa.
Phil: It was about the salad?
Claire: I have been recommending wedge salads to you amongst other things, for years, and you never listen to me. And then some idiot suggests it, and you can't wait to try a wedge salad? It makes me feel like I don't matter.

Quote from Gloria in No Small Feet

Gloria: [aside to camera] When Phil told me about this house, I offered to help. Now that Manny's away at college and Joe goes to kindergarten, I have time for one of my old hobbies confronting the devil in all his forms.
[flashback:]
Gloria: I have everything I need: sage, a spoon from the Vatican cafeteria, my maracas.

Quote from Gloria in Halloween

Phil: God, you guys look great.
Gloria: [flat accent] Thank you, Phil. I try my best. You look very dead-like.
Jay: Gloria, stop it. I said I was sorry.
Gloria: Oh, no, no, Jay. For now on, I only speakin' proper American so I don't embarrass you.
Phil: Did she just get back from the dentist?
Jay: She's mad at me because I told her sometimes people can't understand her.
Phil: Make it right, Jay. We're all just hanging by a thread.