‘Flip Flop’
Season 4, Episode 20 - Aired April 10, 2013
When Claire and Cameron's "flipped" house goes back on the market, they find selling the property isn't as easy as they expected. Meanwhile, Javier visits Manny and brings along his new girlfriend.
Quote from Luke
Haley: Okay, so after a quick scan of his Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, Pinterest, and Instagram, here is what I know.
Luke: Privacy is dead?
Quote from Cameron
Cameron: Here's to the best construction crew in the business.
Claire: Okay.
Cameron: Hank. Luis. Paco! Wish you could be here right now, buddy.
Alex: What? Did he die?
Cameron: No, he's on the roof, fixing a shingle that he should've gotten right the first time.
Quote from Gil Thorpe
Gil Thorpe: Dunphy, I'm not gonna lie to you. You guys did a nice job on the house. My buyer wants in.
Phil: Fantastic! That is great news! You know, when we first got into this-
Gil Thorpe: Whoa, the small talk's over. Here's what we're prepared to offer.
Phil: You're joking, right?
Gil Thorpe: I don't joke about real estate. I joke about golf and Mexicans. It's okay, though. I'm married to one.
Quote from Jay
Jay: Now I'm not an art expert like you, but I did acquire this piece in a gallery in one of the finer Vegas casinos. What do you think?
Trish: It does say something.
Jay: He used to, before his little voice box broke. It said, "Welcome home, master. Ruff day?"
Quote from Gil Thorpe
Phil: [on the phone] Gil! Phil Dunphy.
Gil Thorpe: Ha ha ha! I knew you'd come slinking back! [to the other golfers] Hey, guys! It's Dunphy. He's cavin'. What did I tell you? What did I tell you, hey? [on the phone] Oh, Dunphy, I can play you like a ukulele, 'cause you're small and dainty.
Phil: Gil, I wanna talk to you about your offer.
Gil Thorpe: Oh, ho! Let me stop you right there. This is how this is gonna go down. First of all, I'm gonna take you out to a very nice dinner. I'm gonna talk really sweet to you. And then I'm gonna lay you down by the fire...
Phil: Oh.
Gil Thorpe: Slow at first, then... And then you're gonna go home and tell everybody you went to the movies, but you and I both know that you got thorpedoed.
Quote from Cameron
Cameron: And, as we make our way out of the gourmet kitchen, we find ourselves back in the warm embrace of the parlor.
Mitchell: Easy Duchess, it's just one room, not Gosford Park.
Quote from Jay
Gloria: I love the house. It's beautiful. Here is a tree.
Manny: It's a pachira, a Taiwanese symbol of good financial fortune. It's also known as a money tree.
Jay: That makes two of us.
Quote from Luke
Luke: Hey, I've got a friend who wants to buy a house. Maybe I can show it to him after school. Then if he buys it, I'd get the commission. What would that be?
Claire: Adorable.
Luke: I'm serious. And I'm not adorable. I'm getting a mustache.
Lily: I know my A-B-C's.
Luke: Wow. I guess things weren't about you for a second.
Quote from Jay
Gloria: [on the phone] It's okay, Manny. I'll see you in a minute. Yes, I'll be polite and I'll be nice. I promise. [hangs up] I'm going to kill him.
Jay: What'd Javier do this time?
Gloria: His one big weekend alone with his son, and I just found out that he brought his latest bimbo along. He always does this. You remember that time that he took Manny and that stripper fishing?
Jay: Yeah. They barely got a nipple. Come on. That was good. I just thought of that.
Gloria: Are you done?
Jay: I bet she was comfortable with the pole. Ah. Should've quit after "nipple." How does Leno do it night after night?
Gloria: I was just wondering that about myself.
Quote from Mitchell
Cameron: Something you wanna say, Mitchell?
[aside to camera:]
Mitchell: Yes. I told you so. I warned you this would happen. I tried to stop it, but you wouldn't let me. I was right, and you were wrong. Uh, you live in this ridiculous candy-colored fantasy land. I am so much smarter than you, and it is killing me not to rub your nose in it!
[back:]
Mitchell: No. I'm just thinking.