TV Quotes

Alexis: That was low, like David's standards.
David: Or the placement of Alexis' back tattoo.
Johnny: Alexis has a back tattoo?
Moira: Alexis, what have you done to yourself?!
David: It says "that's hot" in Cantonese. Got it in Hong Kong.
Alexis: Ugh! I was 12-years-old!

Johnny: You took your signs? I didn't know you took the signs. Why would you take your own signs?
Moira: Well, I couldn't very well take Jocelyn's. That would be stealing and I'm running a clean campaign.
Johnny: You call this a clean campaign?
Moira: Politics 101, John. When you have limited resources, your best course of action is to create a stir. It's exciting. It's fun. It's like that episode of Sunrise Bay when I stole my own bébé.

Johnny: When might we expect your daughter to show up? Because we do have a very busy day ahead of us.
Hank: Well, Baby's still sleeping. But if you wanna go and wake her up, tell her what happened, by all means.
Moira: Where is bébé's chamber?
Hank: [floorboards creak] Oh, there she is now. She's either up, or takin' a leak.
Moira: Either way, great progress for bébé.

Moira: After a glut of unasinous ideas put forth today, the room is suddenly bombilating with anticipation. Can we feel that? It's almost as though we're building towards some sort of inevitable climax.

Alexis: Excuse me, this has nothing to do with the fact that I'm single. The singles market is very lucrative. Did you know, that there's a small town in Ireland that hosts a singles week every year, and it's become so popular, that they're able to subsidize their entirely yearly budget, just on profits?
Moira: It's a valiant first effort, Alexis, it is. But darling, do keep those wheels turning! As the Irish like to say, [Irish accent] it's a cinch to mash the Murphy where there's love.

Moira: Exactly, David. You are bored, lethargic, and practically dripping with ennui!
David: Okay, that's a bit much.
Moira: I blame myself. I've set a standard of activity and engagement so high you don't even try.
David: Okay, I am on a much needed respite whilst in between jobs.
Moira: You are squandering your social capital. A taste-maker like you should be out there, tasting things!
David: Uh, I'm at the buffet, and there is nothing to taste!

Alexis: David, I just- I miss my life! And I miss doing things. And I miss being surrounded by loose acquaintances who think that I'm funny, and smart, and charming. Will you? Just a few people. Please. You can't tell me that you don't wanna hang out with people other than me.
David: Obviously.