Phil Dunphy's Greetings
Enjoy the creative ways that Phil Dunphy answers the phone, starts a conversation or enters a room.
Phil: [knocks] What's the most dangerous type of uranium cake? Yellow!
Phil: [answering FaceTime] What's the best first-person shooter about genetically-modified space marines? Halo!
Phil: I have to go show a house. But first, what was Elton John's sexual orientation in the '70s?
Haley & Alex: Bi.
Haley: You've done that one before.
Phil: And it never gets old. Like the good Captain Fantastic himself.
Dean Hinden: [phone rings] Oh, hey, Phil, where were Nationals senior year? Cleveland, Oh... [answers phone] Hi-o!
Phil: [hushed] Can you imagine putting up with this for years on end?
Claire: It's hard.
Phil: [ringtone playing] Oh, quick. What nickname did Jennifer Lopez steal from Jon Lovitz? J... Never mind. [answers phone] Hello? Yes, the rings.
Luke: Wow. He didn't say "J-Lo."
Haley: He also heard that siren and didn't say, "There's my ride." Did we break Dad?
Claire: And when was the last time you saw him pick up a can of whipped cream and not do his "I've got rabies" gag? Oh, my God. Did we go too far? Have we knocked the fun out of him?
Jay: [phone rings] Ooh. I've been wanting to do this. Quick, what's the ring around an angel's head?
Jay: [answering the phone] Halo!
Phil: You did the angel one! Ordinarily, I'd be delighted, but this isn't gonna be one of our fun chats.
Jay: You mean like that time you called me when you saw that blimp?
Phil: It was so low, they waved back.
Luke: Hey, handsome. Uh, can you sign this? You don't need to read it.
Phil: Never do!
Luke: Right there.
Phil: Oh. Quick. Nature's sure-fire sunburn remedy? [answering phone] Aloe?
Phil: Wait, what's my favourite hospital food?
Phil: [answering phone] Jell-o!
Phil: [cell phone riming] Quick- Who sang "Evil Woman"?
Phil: [answering phone] ELO!
Phil: Quick, girls, famous Danny from "Moonstruck." [answering phone] Aiello?
Jay: I really want this win, Phil. I can taste it, like metal.
Phil: Me, too. Metal.
Jay: I don't know what it is with this guy, but no matter what I do, I just can't win with him.
Phil: That's the way I am with his son. And Time Warner cable. It's emasculating, you know?
Jay: I mean, it's not a feeling a man should have.
Phil: Jay, you know what the beginning of "love" is?
Jay: Oh, for God's sake, we're just talking here. Why do you always have to make everything bigger than it is?!
Kenneth: Record scratch! Oh, that's me buzzin'. Oh, it's Paris. She's my assistant in Tokyo. You'd think they'd know how to demo 4-D gaming graphics without my help. They don't. Hey, Luke, what instrument does yo-yo ma play?
Kenneth: [answering phone] Cello?
Phil: He's me. And he's spectacular.