The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air Quotes

The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air

The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air

After getting into a fight back home in Philadelphia, Will is sent to live with his wealthy uncle and aunt in their Bel-Air mansion.

Starring: Will Smith, James Avery, Janet Hubert, Daphne Reid, Alfonso Ribeiro, Karyn Parsons, Tatyana Ali, Joseph Marcell.
Recurring Actors: DJ Jazzy Jeff, Ross Bagley, Vernee Watson, Jenifer Lewis, Nia Long.
Original Run: 1990-1996.

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Quote from Geoffrey in Not with My Pig, You Don't

Geoffrey: Oh, dear.
Vivian: Good, Geoffrey. You got the paper.
Geoffrey: Yes, madam.
Vivian: Make sure you buy the 100 copies that Mr. Banks wanted.
Geoffrey: Before we make such an investment, perhaps it might be wise for you to peruse the contents of this article.
Vivian: Oh, dear. Geoffrey, how on earth did they get a hold of all these stories?
Geoffrey: Madam, the press is made up of a very low type of person. You see what they've done to Fergie.

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Quote from Will in Papa's Got a Brand New Excuse

Will: Hey, you know what, you ain't got to do nothing, Uncle Phil. You know, it ain't like I'm still 5 years old, you know. It ain't like I'm going to be sitting up every night asking my mom: "When's Daddy coming home?" You know, who needs him? He wasn't there to teach me how to shoot my first basket, but I learned, didn't I? And I got pretty good at it too, didn't I, Uncle Phil?
Philip: Yeah, you did.
Will: Got through my first date without him, right? I learned how to drive. I learned how to shave. I learned how to fight without him. I had 14 great birthdays without him. He never even sent me a damn card. To hell with him! I didn't need him then and I don't need him now.
Philip: Will-
Will: No, you know what, Uncle Phil? I'm gonna get through college without him. I'm gonna get a great job without him. I'm going to marry me a beautiful honey, and I'm gonna have me a whole bunch of kids and I'm gonna be a better father than he ever was. And I sure as hell don't need him for that, because there ain't a damn thing he could ever teach me about how to love my kids. How come he don't want me, man?

Quote from Hilary in Where There's a Will, There's a Way (Part 2)

Vivian: Look, there he goes.
Trevor: [on TV] Hilary Banks...
Hilary: Yes, Trevor?
Trevor: [on TV] Will you marry me? [thud]
[As the TV picture turns to static, the family are stunned into silence]
Will: I ain't no bungee expert or nothing... But I don't think he's supposed to be slamming into the ground like that.
[A title card appears on the TV]
Hilary: "Please stand by"? Great. The president's about to interrupt my marriage proposal.

Quote from Carlton in Just Say Yo

Carlton: Where am I? Last thing I remember, I was doing the running man to I Will Always Love You.
Will: Carlton, you're at a hospital.
Carlton: Wow, I feel terrible. I never thought losing my virginity would be this painful.
Will: Carlton, I got some bad news.
Carlton: Oh, God, I malfunctioned.
Will: No. See, you never made it past the dance floor. Those pills that you took weren't vitamins.
Carlton: What were they?
Will: Look, you gotta promise you're not gonna overreact.
Carlton: What could be worse than finding out I'm still a virgin?
Will: It was speed.
Carlton: Oh, my God. I'm a drug addict and a virgin!

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Quote from Philip in Will Gets a Job

Philip: I don't get it, Will. Why the job?
Will: I just wanted to pay for the homecoming myself.
Philip: But I gave you a check.
Will: I tore it up.
Philip: Why?
Will: 'Cause you were right, Uncle Phil. Man, I'm getting soft. I'm a man, and a man should be able to stand on his own two feet make his own way, like you did. I mean, a man does it for himself. I mean, it's a hard road to travel, but after you travel it and you look back on what you accomplished, you can say, "l did that. I'm a man."
Philip: That's the biggest load of bull I've heard since I left the farm. Nobody does anything without help, Will. People opened doors for me, and I've worked hard to open doors for you. It doesn't make you any less of a man to walk through them.

Quote from Philip in Best Laid Plans

Philip: I can't imagine what kind of excuse you could come up with. Do you have anything to say in your own defense?
Will: Nothing. It's shameful, Uncle Phil. I mean, here you are busting your hump trying to impart values and teach basic human decency and I turn around and do some mess like this.
Philip: I just don't get it, Will. I mean what is going on in that head of yours?
Will: I don't know, Uncle Phil. I'm out of control. Please stop me before I disobey again.
Philip: Don't you ever stop to think before you do these disgusting things?
Will: Of course, I do, Uncle Phil. Do you think I like being the way I am? I'm a victim. I'm a victim of my imagination. Help me.
Philip: Well all right, since you put it that way. I'm not going to punish you, Will.
Will: You know, that's radical, Uncle Phil, but it just might work.
Philip: I'm not going to punish you today, maybe not even tomorrow. You see, I need to think a long, long time about just what I'm going to do with you. I don't know, it might come to me in the middle of the night or maybe next week, or a few years from now. In the meantime, why don't you worry about it? Be afraid, Will. Be very afraid. [laughs maniacally]
[sometime later:]
Philip: [reading a book of Medieval Tortures] I've got it. Will!

Quote from Jazz in You Bet Your Life

Will: I mean, Jazz, we was right for leaving Carlton, right?
Jazz: Absolutely.
Will: I mean, I've been looking forward to this weekend for a long time. And there ain't no way that I should miss out on it just cause he got the hots for the slots.
Jazz: You on a roll with a side of slaw.
Will: I mean, what? He expect us to babysit him while he have a nervous breakdown? He's so selfish, man.
Jazz: That boy put the "E" in ignorant.