The Golden Girls Quotes

The Golden Girls

The Golden Girls

Four older women share friendship and a home in Miami as they show that life doesn't stop at fifty.

Starring: Bea Arthur, Betty White, Rue McClanahan, Estelle Getty.
Original Run: 1985-1992.

Quote of the Day

Friday, July 30, 2021

Quote from Blanche in Vacation

Dorothy: Oh, Blanche, get a hold of yourself.
Blanche: I don't want to get a hold of myself. They invite us to go out on a boat and then they sail us right out in the middle of a storm. And we end up shipwrecked on this godforsaken island.
Rick: Hey, so, we made a few mistakes. Nobody's perfect, huh.
Dwayne: Yeah, what's the big deal?
Blanche: "What's the big deal?" You almost killed us, you nitwits. I hate you. I curse the day I ever laid eyes on you. I curse the day your momma ever laid eyes on your daddy. I curse the day your daddy ever lay down with your momma.

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Quote from Sophia in The Engagement

Rose: I don't drink before bedtime. I stop all liquids at noon and I still wake up.
Sophia: I never have that problem. Never. I sleep like a log. I never get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom. I go in the morning. Every morning like clockwork, at 7 am I pee. Unfortunately, I don't wake up till 8.

Quote from Blanche in Hey, Look Me Over

Rose: Wait a minute. If you didn't sleep with any of the men in these journals, then how come it says "Bed" on the cover?
Blanche: [laughs] Oh, that doesn't say "Bed."
Rose: Right there, it does.
Blanche: Oh, silly, those are my initials. Blanche Elizabeth Devereaux.
Dorothy: Your initials spell "Bed"?

Quote from Sophia in The Flu

Blanche: You don't have to worry about me. I never get sick. I take very good care of myself. I treat my body like a temple.
Sophia: Yeah, open to everyone, day or night.

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Quote from Dorothy in 72 Hours

Dorothy: What an idiot! Of all the lamebrained, moronic dopes. I mean, if ever I wanted to reach right through the phone and strangle somebody.
Sophia: Not really a morning person, are you, pussycat?
Dorothy: It's this caterer that I hired for my Save the Wetlands banquet. He's a week late with the menu, now he tells me that he's going to serve wild duck and crayfish. They come from the wetlands. It's like holding a Save the Whales function on a Japanese trawler.

Quote from Blanche in The Actor

Patrick Vaughn: The moon is hanging awful low in the sky tonight, isn't it, Busty? Josie.
Blanche: It sure is, Biff.
Patrick Vaughn: It makes me want to kiss you, Jose.
Blanche: Oh, mind your manners, Biff. Why, we at the 4th of July picnic. The whole town is here.
Patrick Vaughn: To hell with this town. Come away with me.
Blanche: But you're a drifter, Biff. I can't just pull up stakes and run off with you.
Patrick Vaughn: Please reconsider, Josie. You're the prettiest girl in the county. I need to have your answer now. What's it gonna be?
Blanche: I want you to take me, Biff. [As they hug, Blanche's breasts begin to deflate] Oh. Oh.
Patrick Vaughn: Blanche, I am sorry. I'm afraid I popped your bosom.
Blanche: Don't you worry about a thing, Patrick. My backup pair can take a lot more punishment.

Quote from Blanche in Take Him, He's Mine

Dorothy: And I was feeling jealous and Ionely and... God knows what else.
Blanche: Magenta.
Dorothy: Excuse me?
Blanche: Magenta. That's what I call it when I get that way. All kinds of feelings tumbling all over themselves. Well, you know, you're not quite blue because you're not really sad and although you're a little jealous, you wouldn't say you're green with envy, and every now and then you realize you're kinda scared but you'd hardly call yourself yellow. I hate that feeling. I just hate it. And I hate the color magenta. That's why I named it that. Magenta. No way to really explain it but, fortunately, between friends, you don't have to.