Scrubs Quotes
- Episodes
- Season 1
- Season 2
- Season 3
- 301 My Own American Girl
- 302 My Journey
- 303 My White Whale
- 304 My Lucky Night
- 305 My Brother, Where Art Thou?
- 306 My Advice to You
- 307 My Fifteen Seconds
- 308 My Friend the Doctor
- 309 My Dirty Secret
- 310 My Rule of Thumb
- 311 My Clean Break
- 312 My Catalyst
- 313 My Porcelain God
- 314 My Screw Up
- 315 My Tormented Mentor
- 316 My Butterfly
- 317 My Moment of Un-Truth
- 318 His Story II
- 319 My Choosiest Choice of All
- 320 My Fault
- 321 My Self-Examination
- 322 My Best Friend's Wedding
- Season 4
- Season 5
- Season 6
- Season 7
- Season 8
- Season 9
Scrubs
Scrubs follows a group of medical students, J.D., Elliot and Turk, as they begin work at Sacred Heart teaching hospital.
Starring:
Zach Braff, Sarah Chalke, Donald Faison, Neil Flynn, Ken Jenkins, John C. McGinley, Judy Reyes.
Recurring Actors:
Robert Maschio, Sam Lloyd, Aloma Wright, Christa Miller, Johnny Kastl, Nicole Sullivan, Heather Graham, Tom Cavanagh, Elizabeth Banks, Eliza Coupe, Kerry Bishé, Michael Mosley, Dave Franco.
Original Run: 2001-2010.
Quote of the Day
Quote from Dr. Cox in My Absence
Dr. Cox: Moving on to our next patient. Mr. Francone has been in a coma for well over a year. His organs are starting to fail, and he probably won't be with us very much longer. The most important thing to remember during his final hours here on earth is do not ever come to me and ask me questions about how to treat him. He's a potato. If you do, my answer will always be the same. Sour cream, chives, and if I haven't had any protein that day, maybe just a sprinkling of some of those bacon bits. Oh, my God. His hand. It- It moved. Kidding. [whispers] The man's a potato.
Popular Quotes
Quote from Turk in My Advice to You
J.D.: [v.o.] It's always nice when someone from Carla's family comes to town. Mostly because she cleans our apartment.
Carla: Why is there a pancake in the silverware drawer?
Turk: You mean, why is there silverware in the pancake drawer? Wuh-huh!
Quote from Janitor in My First Day
Janitor: The door is broke. Probably the fifth time or so it don't open.
J.D.: Maybe a penny's stuck in there.
Janitor: Why a penny?
J.D.: I don't know.
Janitor: Did you stick a penny in there?
J.D.: No, I was making small talk.
Janitor: If I find a penny in there, I'm taking you down.
Quote from Dr. Cox in My Student
J.D.: [v.o.] It's hard trying to figure out how to reach somebody. I guess the thing I can do is to think of someone I look up to, and remember how they got through to me.
Dr. Cox: Newbie, the only way you could be less productive right now is if you were in fact the wall on which you're leaning. Of course, then you'd be providing some jackass with a wall on which to lean against and reflect on what a jackass he truly is. I know. Here it's a conundrum.
Quote Collections
-
“Elliot Reid: The Bajingo Monologues”
A collection of quotes featuring Elliot's colorful alternatives to clinical terms for the reproductive parts.
14 quotes
-
A collection of quotes featuring J.D.'s best fantasies.
35 quotes
Trending Quotes
Quote from Turk in My Advice to You
J.D.: [v.o.] It's always nice when someone from Carla's family comes to town. Mostly because she cleans our apartment.
Carla: Why is there a pancake in the silverware drawer?
Turk: You mean, why is there silverware in the pancake drawer? Wuh-huh!
Quote from Janitor in My First Day
Janitor: The door is broke. Probably the fifth time or so it don't open.
J.D.: Maybe a penny's stuck in there.
Janitor: Why a penny?
J.D.: I don't know.
Janitor: Did you stick a penny in there?
J.D.: No, I was making small talk.
Janitor: If I find a penny in there, I'm taking you down.