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‘Our Couples’ Quotes Page 1 of 2

Scrubs: Our Couples

908. Our Couples

Aired January 5, 2010

As everyone appears to be pairing off, Lucy is reluctant to admit she's in a relationship with Cole. Meanwhile, Turk and Dr. Cox get competitive over treating a popular patient.

Quote from Cole

Cole: Man, I never noticed how beautiful a smile you have.
Lucy: Thank you.
Cole: That's probably because I'm mostly focused on how small your cans are.
Lucy: Okay, this is why I don't like you talking during foreplay.
Cole: I didn't know we were about to get nasty.
Lucy: Why do you think none of my horses are watching?
Cole: I truly dig how nuts you are. Oh, hey, can I borrow your laptop to do those endocrine system slides for our study group?
Lucy: What's wrong with yours?
Cole: It's super slow right now 'cause I'm downloading every Golden Girls episode. [laughs] Man, those old chicks are insane. All right, there was this one episode...

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Quote from Drew

Cole: I will take a key, thank you very much.
Drew: I would never willingly give you anything that was not some sort of fatal virus.

Quote from Denise

Lucy: [v.o.] While I was pretending to listen, I thought about how everyone at the hospital seems to be coupling up. There was Drew and Denise. They were still in their puppy love stage.
Denise: Ugh. Drew, if I wanted to be with a girl, I could. Save all the emotional crap for your diary.

Quote from Todd

Turk: What the hell, Todd?!
Todd: Well, I had no choice. He found a picture of adult braces Todd. I can't let that get out there. "Rock and a hard place" five?

Quote from Dr. Cox

Dr. Cox: And the winning streak continues! Yes, sir! Thank you for your help, Mr. Sawyer. As a token of my appreciation, I'm gonna come back later and smother you with a pillow.

Quote from Denise

Denise: Listen up, losers. I'm tired of repeating the same procedure to you guys over and over. I want two sugars, one cream, and only a splash -and I mean a splash - of hazelnut. Okay? Now get outta here.
Drew: You are a wonderful teacher.
Denise: I'm getting better, right?

Quote from Dr. Cox

Dr. Cox: Now then, students, our next patient is suffering from a horrible disease known as "being Dr. Cox's bitch-itis." You may ask yourself, how does one catch such a disease? Well, you do so by losing a bet again and again and again and again. And again and again. Until eventually, the disease renders you helpless to say only the following phrase...
Turk: Dr. Coxy is hella foxy. [all laugh]
Dr. Cox: When I play, I play for keeps. Bank on it.

Quote from Dr. Cox

Dr. Cox: I'll tell you what there, Art. Before we do take a look at that shoulder, we've been having just a ton of good clean fun with one thing in particular. Dr. Turk, you have anything to add?
Turk: I don't think it's, uh, particularly appropriate to discuss this in front of a patient.
Dr. Cox: Approprio maximus.
Turk: Dr. Coxy is hella foxy.
Dr. Cox: I so am!

Quote from Cole

Cole: Oh, hey, what did Drew say about me rejoining the study group?
Lucy: He said no.
Cole: Really? Hey, did you remind him I'm 1/18th American Indian?
Lucy: Are you?
Cole: I don't know, but I always tell people that. Makes the white man feel guilty.

Quote from Dr. Cox

Turk: Once we get the CT back on Arthur's rotator cuff, it's gonna show the best way for me to handle it is surgically.
Dr. Cox: You would say that, you slice-happy knife-jockey. Here's actually what's going to happen. We're going to heal him through medication and PT.
Turk: Right, physical therapy, the miracle of stretching.
Dr. Cox: It sure beats cuttin' Arthur open like he's a pig at a luau.
Turk: Why do you always have to be right?
Dr. Cox: I don't have to. I just am.

Quote from Dr. Cox

Turk: What are you doing? This surgery is risky for a patient half Arthur's age and healthier.
Dr. Cox: Listen to me. This could buy him some time. If we don't do it, he is dead in six months. It's worth a shot.
Turk: It's too risky. I'm right, you're wrong, and I'm not doing it.
Dr. Cox: No, I'm right, and you are wrong, and you damn sure are doing it because I am your boss.
Turk: You're pulling rank on me?
Dr. Cox: I am. Now if you would, please say it.
Turk: No, I'm too pissed off!
Dr. Cox: Those aren't the rules.
Turk: [sighs] Dr. Coxy is hella foxy.
Dr. Cox: Good effort. Do well in surgery.

Quote from Cole

Drew: Crazy idea. How about we just who study in study group?
Cole: Uh, no can do. I gotta take a walk to clear my head, maybe grab a fruit roll-up. I don't even know right now.

Quote from Drew

Lucy: Drew, why would you tell everyone about me and Cole?
Drew: There has never been anything in the entire world I care less about, except maybe this moment and American Idol. Cole told us.

Quote from Turk

Dr. Cox: Don't say anything. Please.
Turk: I don't think I have to. You'll beat yourself up.

Quote from Cole

Cole: Damn, girl! You can't just jump in front of golf carts. That's how gardeners die.

Quote from Turk

Dr. Cox: Came to get your licks in, huh? I get it. I damn sure deserve it. You may fire at will.
Turk: Actually, I came to say thank you. You showed a lot of stones in making that hard call for Art. It was the right choice. I was just scared to take it.
Dr. Cox: It cost him his life. We stole six months from that guy.
Turk: You and I both know that he would've spent most of that time in this hospital, just waiting to die. You pushed me to give him a chance. You had my back on this one, and I want you to know that you can always count on me to have yours.
Dr. Cox: I appreciate you saying that. Now I know exactly what it feels like to be in a Morgan Freeman movie. Hey. Come here. To Art. [they toast]

Quote from Cole

Cole: You're my number one shorty, yo.
Lucy: Yeah, that actually leads perfectly into what I wanted to talk to you about.
Cole: All ears, boo.
Lucy: See, now that we're officially a couple, we're gonna have to start, well, changing you. Okay, boo?
Cole: [chuckles] Wait, what now?
[later, Lucy lectures Cole in front of a whiteboard:]
Cole: Man, this is so hard! How am I supposed to remember all this?
Lucy: While you're my boyfriend, please refrain from using the following words and phrases: Crushing it, ghost riding the whip, hunting the big dawg, redonkulous, wrangle dangle, shtoops, the "donk" show, gittin' right, homeskillet, broseph, brosephine and sexting.
Cole: On the serious?
Lucy: There's another one. Also, substituting your name for words that sort of sound like your name. Stone Cole, Cole War, Piña Cole-lada. You know what I'm saying.
Cole: Girl, I can't give this all up cole turkey.
Lucy: Why don't we just call it a day? And we'll, uh, start fresh in the morning.
Cole: Sizzle.

Quote from Turk

Lucy: Then their was our dysfunctional mom and dad.
Turk: How you holding up?
Dr. Cox: Fine. You?
Turk: All good. There's no way in hell you're beating me At "hands on a coma patient," so take your hands off. Quit.
Dr. Cox: I don't quit.
Turk: I don't quit more. [quietly] Oh, no, it's his grandson.
Boy: What are you doing to my grandpa?
Dr. Cox: Nice try. That's Dr. Etten's kid. Hey, you, next time try dialing down the acting a notch. Less is more. Go on, get outta here. Fake grandson? That is some weak sauce.

Quote from Lucy

Drew: She told me you two were sleeping together.
Lucy: Denise, that was girl talk! You have broken a sacred bond between sisters.
Denise: Oh, no. Now I'm not gonna get to wear the traveling pants this week. Look, I know that you've got Daddy/food/body/confidence/horse issues. But Cole? Really?
Lucy: He's only a booty call. It's just I can't stop. It's like having a scab you know you're not supposed to pick at, but you just can't help it 'cause you have to know what's under that pus-y filled mess.
Drew: Call me crazy, but I think you kids might just make it.
Lucy: You think?
Drew & Denise: No.

Quote from Drew

Drew: Our presentation is at 7:00 a.m. Cole's supposed to do all the slides, Lucy, where the hell is he?
Lucy: Why are you asking me? Maybe he's napping. Maybe he's training to be a pastry chef. I don't know what his dreams are, Drew.
Drew: This is why I skipped junior high.
Maya: I'm sick of Cole. He's always running late. And I'm tired of him asking me to hook him up with Russell Crowe.
Trang: Yeah, and he's always making light of my family for coming to this country on a boat.
Drew: Trang, your dad owns, like, eight Hometown Buffets. Get over it.

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