Scrubs Quote of the Day

Sunday, April 14, 2024

Quote from Dr. Kelso in My Fruit Cups

Dr. Simon Reid: So, did Dr. Gerson ever contact you?
Elliot: You told her to talk to me?
Dr. Simon Reid: She went to med school with a colleague at my hospital. Come on, I want to go see the department.
Dr. Kelso: Paging Dr. Backbone to the Bajingo Ward. [laughs]

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Recent Quotes

Saturday, April 13, 2024

Quote from Kim in My Mirror Image

J.D.: You know what's so messed up about this whole baby thing? I mean, I feel like I'm drowning, and it hasn't even fazed Kim.
[meanwhile, Kim is crying as she operates on a patient:]
Kim: [sobbing] Okay, let's, uh, close her up.
Nurse: Dr. Briggs? Why are you crying?
Kim: This song always gets me. My brother was killed by a funky cold medina.

Friday, April 12, 2024

Quote from Dr. Cox in His Story

J.D.: Morning, Dr. Cox.
Dr. Cox: [v.o.] Gladys, Ginger, Tiffany, no. Cheryl, Betsy... Betsy. Ooh, that's new.
Dr. Cox: Betsy, good morning. Let's make with the chop-chop.
J.D.: You already used Betsy like six months ago.
Dr. Cox: I don't care.
Dr. Cox: [v.o.] Dammit!

Thursday, April 11, 2024

Quote from Dr. Cox in My Malpractice Decision

Neena: So my dad's gonna be okay?
Dr. Cox: He's great.
Neena: Thank you. And I hope I didn't ruffle your feathers too much while I was here.
Dr. Cox: Sweetheart, I find it amusing that you think you're so much as a blip on my radar. You better go ahead and jot this down in your little lawyer notebook: Nothing you could possibly do could ever, hee-hever get to me.
Neena: I should probably thank him, too. [kisses J.D.]
Dr. Cox: Oh, my God. I'm gagging and vomiting at the same time! I'm- I'm gavomiting!

Wednesday, April 10, 2024

Quote from Dr. Cox in My Screw Up

Ben: I'm glad you made it. Listen, there's one more thing you have to do for me.
Dr. Cox: You can't keep me from getting drunk.
Ben: You have to forgive yourself for everything that went down the other day.
Dr. Cox: God, you're, you're so annoying.
Ben: Yeah.
Dr. Cox: OK.
Ben: Good.
Dr. Cox: [to Ben] Hey, where's your camera? Aren't you gonna take some pictures?
J.D.: Pictures of what?
Dr. Cox: You know, crying babies covered in chocolate. People singing happy birthday to my son who've never met him before. You know, the whole routine.
J.D.: Where do you think we are?
[When Dr. Cox turns around, Ben is no longer there]

Tuesday, April 9, 2024

Quote from Dr. Cox in My Clean Break

Woman: Hi, cutie! Since you have so many balls and too many toys can be over-stimulating for an infant, Brantley here was wondering if he could borrow one to play with!
Dr. Cox: Oh, that's funny, because Jack here was just wondering why the crazy lady who just spent the last hour chain smoking and talking on her cell phone while her kid ate sand would come over to two complete strangers and give them parenting advice!
Jordan: Oh, he also thanked me for not naming him "Brantley"!
Dr. Cox: Yeah. [to Jordan] I love our family.

Monday, April 8, 2024

Quote from J.D. in My Philosophy

Elaine: You know, it always feels so weird to be sitting around, hoping someone's family pulls them off life support.
J.D.: I honestly believe in hospitals there's like this balance, you know? It's like when one person dies, another person gets a chance to live. I like to call it the Circle of Life.
Dr. Cox: Oh, my God, you must stop watching The Lion King.
J.D.: I like that baby lion cub. What's his name?
Dr. Cox: Simba.
J.D.: Trick question! You like it too.

Upcoming Quotes

Monday, April 15, 2024

A quote from J.D. in the episode My Old Lady.

Tuesday, April 16, 2024

A quote from Turk in the episode My Lucky Charm.

Wednesday, April 17, 2024

A quote from Turk in the episode My New Game.

Thursday, April 18, 2024

A quote from Janitor in the episode My New Old Friend.

Friday, April 19, 2024

A quote from J.D. in the episode My Heavy Meddle.