The Golden Girls Quotes

The Golden Girls

The Golden Girls

Four older women share friendship and a home in Miami as they show that life doesn't stop at fifty.

Starring: Bea Arthur, Betty White, Rue McClanahan, Estelle Getty.
Original Run: 1985-1992.

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Quote from Dorothy in Valentine's Day

[flashback:]
Blanche: Well, we are going away for a romantic weekend to the Bahamas with Jeff and Rich and Randy. In this day and age it might be a good idea to take along some protection.
Rose: What kind of protection?
Dorothy: Two armed Pinkerton guards. No, Blanche is talking about, uh...
Rose: A Nestle's Crunch?
Dorothy: One over.
Rose: An enema bag?
Dorothy: To the right.
Rose: Dentu-Grip?
Dorothy: Condoms, Rose. Condoms, condoms, condoms!

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Popular Quotes

Quote from Blanche in Hey, Look Me Over

Rose: Wait a minute. If you didn't sleep with any of the men in these journals, then how come it says "Bed" on the cover?
Blanche: [laughs] Oh, that doesn't say "Bed."
Rose: Right there, it does.
Blanche: Oh, silly, those are my initials. Blanche Elizabeth Devereaux.
Dorothy: Your initials spell "Bed"?

Quote from Dorothy in The Way We Met

[flashback:]
Rose: I'll make it up to you, Dorothy, I promise. Listen, if there's ever a night where you can't sleep, I'll come to your room and sing "Kumbaya."
Dorothy: Rose, I don't know what to say. Yes, I do. Don't ever do that.

Quote from Blanche in It's a Miserable Life

Blanche: Wish me luck.
Dorothy: Wait. Blanche, why should you do it?
Blanche: Because we'll have a better chance. I happen to be a wonderful orator. And two of the commissioners can verify that.
Dorothy: Blanche, "orator" means "speaker".
Blanche: Really? Oh. Well, somebody else do the talking.

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Quote from Blanche in Guess Who's Coming to the Wedding?

Blanche: I want to talk to you, Dorothy. Listen, I know this isn't easy for you, so I'm gonna let you in on a sorority secret that was passed on to me at Miss MacGyver's Finishing School. Now, whenever you feel you're about to lose control, just take my hand and give it a little squeeze. I guarantee you'll feel 100% better.
Dorothy: And that's the big secret?
Blanche: Oh, no! The big secret was that Miss MacGyver and Miss McKinney were sharing a one-bedroom apartment off campus.
Dorothy: Oh, will you..!

Quote from Rose in Mary Has a Little Lamb

Blanche: Rose. Oh, Rose!
Rose: Blanche, what's wrong?
Blanche: I never finished reading this letter from Merrill till just now. Read that last paragraph.
Rose: "My sentence has been overturned on a technicality. I'm getting out on the 21st. Now, finally, we can make all our dreams come true."
Blanche: Isn't that terrible?
Rose: Well, he's written catchier stuff, but I wouldn't call it terrible.
Blanche: I'm not asking for a literary critique, you dweeb!

Quote from Rose in One for the Money

[flashback:]
Blanche: You know, this is boring.
Rose: I know how we could make the time go faster. We could sing a work song, like they do on the railroad. Just follow my lead. [singing] Gonna stuff a chicken.
Blanche & Dorothy: Gonna stuff a chicken
Rose: Like my mama taught me
Blanche & Dorothy: Like my mama taught me
Rose: Gonna take the chicken, [high-pitched] down to Mississippi
Sophia: Rose. Rose, just stuff it.