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‘The Heart Attack’ Quotes Page 1 of 4

The Golden Girls: The Heart Attack

110. The Heart Attack

Aired November 23, 1985

During a ferocious storm, the girls worry about Sophia when she starts experiencing chest pains.

Quote from Blanche

Rose: My grandparents lived till their 90s. One was 102.
Blanche: In Minnesota.
Rose: So?
Blanche: Rose, you know how they freeze dead people to preserve them and then bring them back? That's like living in Minnesota. The cold slows down the aging process. I would move there in a shot if only they had men there.
Rose: We have men in Minnesota.
Blanche: Farmers, Rose. Farmers.

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Quote from Rose

Sophia: You're Scandinavian. What do you know, a thousand ways to make herring?
Rose: Well, not a thousand, but a lot, and I'm famous for my Lindstrom surprise.
Blanche: What in the world is that?
Sophia: Herring pie. The surprise is, you think it's pie, like apple, but when you bite into it, it's herring!
Dorothy: Oh, what fun!
Rose: It was. My cat was named Lindstrom. I used to make it for him on his birthday and other holidays.
Blanche: Wait, your last name was Lindstrom. You named your cat Lindstrom Lindstrom?
Rose: Yes, it was less confusing for him.

Quote from Blanche

Rose: This is a very depressing conversation.
Blanche: Well, I want a fancy funeral. I want a big parade with a riderless horse. And I want to lie in state, and then be buried in Arlington Cemetery.
Rose: Why Arlington Cemetery?
Blanche: Because it's full of men.
Rose: But they're all dead.
Blanche: So are the men I date.

Quote from Dorothy

Dorothy: Boy, what a night.
Blanche: You said it. It sure makes you think.
Dorothy: Sure does.
Rose: About what?
Dorothy: About our policy in Guatemala. About death, Rose.

Quote from Blanche

Dorothy: You know, I knew someone who went to this fabulous restaurant in Paris and just had watercress for lunch because, you know, she didn't want to gain weight. And then after lunch, she walked out of the restaurant and a gargoyle fell off the building, hit her on the head, and killed her.
Blanche: Oh, no.
Dorothy: I mean, look at what her last meal was.
Blanche: That is tragic, just tragic. Here, honey, dig in.
Dorothy: 'Course, it will be just my luck. I'll eat, I'll gain 40 pounds, and live to be 90.
Rose: Me, too. I'm healthy as a horse. Unfortunately, I'll wind up looking like one.
Blanche: You know, all it takes is one little dessert and my panties cut off my circulation.
Dorothy: I pass.
Rose: Me, too.
Blanche: I'm not touching that.
Dorothy: I mean, I put on 12 pounds just from dinner alone.
Blanche: Let's go for a walk.
Rose: Right, burn it off.
Dorothy: Are you kidding? After what we ate, we'd have to walk to Canada.
Blanche: Oh, Mounties. I love Canadian men!

Quote from Blanche

Blanche: Did you see that Emma Jane eat?
Dorothy: Oh!
Blanche: I could not believe my eyes! That woman must weigh 275 pounds. She never stopped shoving it in. And then she had to talk the entire time. She just sprayed food all over the table, like a mist! I got it in my hair. It was hitting me like pellets. I got a piece of rice in my eye. She could have put my eye out.

Quote from Blanche

Rose: Well, I never had food like that in my life.
Blanche: Now, I spent a summer in Italy four years ago. I never ate this well. 'Course, I never ate. Who'd have the time or the energy, if you get my drift.
Rose: No.
Blanche: Oh, Rose. Italian men are just the sexiest, most romantic, most gorgeous men in the world. Of course they just worshiped me because I'm blonde and feminine and young, with a great body.
Dorothy: What mirror do you use?

Quote from Sophia

Sophia: Oh, boy. I ate too much scungilli.
Dorothy: What's the matter?
Sophia: I got a bubble.
Dorothy: Why are you rubbing your chest?
Sophia: The bubble is in my chest.
Dorothy: What do you mean, you have a bubble? Is it pain?
Sophia: If it was pain, I'd call it pain. I have a bubble.

Quote from Sophia

Dorothy: Blanche, do you know what a bubble is?
Blanche: I know what a bauble is.
Rose: I know what it is. I've had a bubble.
Sophia: In your head.

Quote from Sophia

Dorothy: Ma, you know, you don't look good.
Sophia: I'm short and I'm old. What did you expect, Princess Di?

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