Previous Episode Next Episode 

‘Rose: Portrait of a Woman’ Quotes Page 1 of 2

The Golden Girls: Rose: Portrait of a Woman

721. Rose: Portrait of a Woman

Aired March 7, 1992

Blanche talks Rose into giving Miles a "boudoir photo" for his birthday. Meanwhile, Dorothy is offered a job by a former student.

Quote from Rose

Rose: Oh, speaking at Career Day is quite a responsibility. I still remember Career Day back in St. Olaf.
Sophia: Check, please.
Rose: Gunther Hanchap, St. Olaf's leading shepherd and notary, came to speak. It was so moving when he talked about his solitary existence with the sheep. No human contact for months at a time. Ugh. Just building a special relationship with God's simple creatures. I really wanted to help.
Blanche: So you decided to become a shepherd?
Rose: No. I decided to give Gunther a case of Scotch. And he really appreciated it, until he discovered what mean drunks sheep are. They're kind of like cows when they're drunk. You know what I mean?

Rate

Quote from Sophia

Sophia: Oh, wait a minute, pussycat, I almost forgot. I packed your lunch.
Dorothy: Oh, Ma, you didn't have to do that.
Sophia: I wanted to. Besides, it's the exact same lunch I packed you on your first day of school. Oh. Salami and a thermos of wine. Remember, Dorothy, when you go to work today, be proud. You're a Petrillo, which in Italian means, "Hey, I'm on a break here."

Quote from Dorothy

Rose: Oh, Dorothy, how would you feel about a birthday present of a picture of me in sexy lingerie?
Dorothy: I'd rather have the cash.
Rose: Actually, it's not for you. It's for Miles.
Dorothy: He'd rather have the cash.

Quote from Rose

Blanche: What are you doin', Rose?
Rose: I'm wrapping Miles' birthday present. I got him a golf club. But don't tell him. It's a surprise.

Quote from Rose

Blanche: Rose, honey, you've got to use some imagination. Now, I know what men like for their birthdays. They like a surprise that makes their libidos stand up and say, "Hello, there." Oh, I know! You can give Miles one of those boudoir photographs. You know, where you pose for pictures in sexy lingerie?
Rose: Oh, I don't know. I'd feel cheap like... Well, like you.

Quote from Blanche

Blanche: Oh, Rose, come on, it's a great idea. The pictures are just an intimate way to let a fellow know he's the one and only man in your life. I've done it 20, 30 times.

Quote from Blanche

Sophia: Wait a minute. Are you talking about those ridiculous pictures Blanche puts on her Christmas cards?
Blanche: Those cards are a moving tribute to the spirit of the season.
Dorothy: A moving tribute? The three wise men and you in a teddy following the Christmas star?

Quote from Blanche

Dorothy: Well, how do I look?
Sophia: Look at Dorothy, ready for her first day as a successful businesswoman. Go get 'em, tiger.
Blanche: You look wonderful, Dorothy, but don't you think those shoulder pads make you seem a little aggressive?
Dorothy: I'm not wearing shoulder pads.
Blanche: Oh. [laughs] Well, in that case, go get 'em, tiger.

Quote from Rose

Rose: Do you really think that's right for Miles? He's never seen that side of me before.
Blanche: You mean, the wanton Rose? The harlot? The elemental woman who cries out for the fiery, passionate response of an elemental man? Is that the side you mean?
Rose: Actually, I meant my heinie. Miles and I always make love with the lights off.
Blanche: Always?
Rose: Always. Well, except for the time we were listening to this concert on radio. [laughing] And when the applause started, his Clapper went crazy. The lights went on, off, on, off, on, off. And Miles did his impression of the old King Kong, and we laughed and laughed. So I pretended I was Godzilla, and we wrestled, got all sweaty. Come to think of it, we never did make love that night.
Blanche: If you didn't make love, what did you do?
Rose: Destroyed Tokyo.

Quote from Dorothy

Randy: Hey, listen, if there's anything I can ever do for you, you let me know, huh?
Dorothy: Well, you know, actually, I I do have an idea for a new video game.
Randy: Really?
Dorothy: Yeah. See, there's this very old, white-haired mother who keeps talking and talking and talking, and there're all these different ways to kill her.
Randy: Sounds kind of weird.
Dorothy: No, I've thought it all out. And then when you arrive at level four, then you get to just nuke her. I mean, just nuke the hell out of her!

Quote from Rose

Miles: Ah, well, no. Look, sweetheart, about the- About the age thing. Something I read someplace, I've always believed. You know, when you're When you're young and beautiful, it's an accident of nature, but when you're beautiful older, you've earned it. That you created yourself.
Rose: Do you really think my picture is beautiful?
Miles: Rose, if I still had a locker, you'd be in it.

Quote from Sophia

Dorothy: Ma, I quit my job at Borealis. I'm going back to teaching. Which means I'm really gonna have to tighten the purse strings around here.
Sophia: And this affects me how?
Dorothy: Ma, you're not making this any easier. I quit because I wasn't happy there. Would you want me to stay someplace I was unhappy just because it paid well?
Sophia: Yes, and I would encourage you to moonlight.

Quote from Sophia

Photographer: You know, Mrs. Petrillo, I've never had a woman your age do a boudoir photograph.
Sophia: Yeah, well, I want to have a good one for the obit.

Quote from Dorothy

Dorothy: Actually, that shepherd was probably better qualified to speak at Career Day than I. I mean, how can I tell the kids how rewarding teaching is when I really don't feel that way anymore? And I'm I'm so frustrated.
Budgets are tight. Classes are crowded. If I'm lucky, I get to substitute an English class. But usually it's- Oh, I can't even say it.
Blanche: Driver's Ed?
Dorothy: God, how I hate putting up those damn cones.

Quote from Dorothy

Dorothy: Do I know you?
Randy: Oh, you probably don't remember. Randy Becker? American Lit?
Dorothy: Of course I- My God, what are you doing here?
Randy: That's my booth over there, Borealis.
Dorothy: Ah, Randy "Mr. Ditch" Becker. And I knew where you were ditching every time, too. At the arcade, wasting hour after hour, day after day playing those senseless pinball machines. Boy, look at you now. Tell me, what business are you in?
Randy: Video games. I've made millions in video games.

Quote from Dorothy

Dorothy: Oh, this is so strange. You know, you teach kids year after year, but you... You never know how they turn out. Look at you. You turned out just great.
Randy: Hey, '75 was a big year for me. My grades were in the toilet. I was ready to bail. Till they brought in "Atilla The Sub."
Dorothy: I loved that name. I earned that name.

Quote from Dorothy

Randy: You know, I just had the craziest idea. If you can inspire goof-off kids like me, think what you could do with my sales force.
Dorothy: What're you talking about?
Randy: Well, it just so happens that I need a motivational trainer, a teacher. You'd be perfect.
Dorothy: Randy Becker, are you offering me a job?
Randy: The benefits are pretty good, the pay's great, and you'd have a health plan. Well I just have to see what Joe has to say about all of this.
Dorothy: Oh, you You just have to see what Joe has to say about all this, huh? And this Joe, would he happen to be "Jo mama"?
Randy: Uh, Joe Stewart. He's my business partner.
Dorothy: Oh, of course. No, Joe Mama's with IBM.

Quote from Sophia

Rose: Are you going to take Rose to that dirty picture place?
Blanche: Yep. I'm just sorry I didn't think of it in time to have her picture painted. I've always wanted to sit for a portrait. An artist could use his palette to bring out my distinctive personality, my Southern fieriness. He could showcase my inner beauty.
Sophia: Plus, he could cheat and paint your head to scale.

Quote from Sophia

Dorothy: You know, Ma, I've been thinking. Since I got a raise in salary, you should get one in your allowance, too.
Sophia: And you ask why I love this woman? Somebody deserves a hug for that. But before I do, let's find out exactly how much I love you. [Dorothy hands Sophia a note] Ah, come on. I love you more than that. Stan loved you more than that. [another] Love, love, love that woman.

Quote from Sophia

Blanche: Where are you going with that thing?
Rose: This is what I'm wearing for the photographer. It's the nightgown that makes Miles, you know, hot.
Sophia: Maybe it's the, you know, flannel.

Page 2 

 Previous Episode Next Episode 
  View another episode