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‘The Engagement’ Quotes Page 1 of 3

The Golden Girls: The Engagement

101. The Engagement

Aired September 14, 1985

Dorothy and Rose are concerned when Blance considers marrying a man she met only a week ago. Meanwhile, Sophia arrives at the girls' house after her retirement home burns down.

Quote from Sophia

Rose: I don't drink before bedtime. I stop all liquids at noon and I still wake up.
Sophia: I never have that problem. Never. I sleep like a log. I never get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom. I go in the morning. Every morning like clockwork, at 7 am I pee. Unfortunately, I don't wake up till 8.

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Quote from Dorothy

[Dorothy holds a hand-mirror under Sophia's mouth]
Rose: What are you doing? She's sleeping.
Dorothy: Just checking. You never know.

Quote from Dorothy

Dorothy: Tell me, how is Blanche?
Rose: She didn't go to work again today. It's been three weeks and she just sits in her room. The museum's gonna fire her.
Dorothy: Well, we've tried everything: golf, the movies, theater tickets. She wouldn't even budge for Julio Iglesias.
Rose: I know grief. It takes time.
Dorothy: Please, Rose. Listen, if you're Irish, you have a wake. You eat, you cry, you drink, you vomit, and you're done. If you're Jewish, you cry, you sit, you eat for seven days, you put on ten pounds, and it's over. We Italians scream, dress up a donkey, hire a band, and that's that. It's these southern Protestants who make it a way of life.

Quote from Blanche

Blanche: I just need some cucumbers to put on my eyes.
Dorothy: You'll have trouble seeing, Blanche.
Blanche: It's very good. It reduces puffiness.
Rose: Does it work on thighs?
Blanche: I don't know, honey. I don't need it on my thighs.

Quote from Rose

Dorothy: You know, I had the shock of my life today. I was in the teacher's lounge, talking to a group of girls in their twenties. Oh, they were so pretty. At that age, you don't even have to be pretty and you're pretty. Anyway, we were laughing and giggling and having a great time and I completely forgot that I was older. You know, I just felt like one of the girls. And we had a wonderful time. And then I got into my car and caught a glimpse of myself, and I almost had a heart attack. This old woman was in the mirror. I didn't even recognize her.
Rose: Who was it?
Dorothy: It was me.

Quote from Sophia

Blanche: Everybody, this is Harry. Harry, this is Rose.
Harry: Rose.
Blanche: And Dorothy.
Harry: Dorothy.
Dorothy: Hi, Harry.
Blanche: And this is Sophia.
Harry: Well, you must be Blanche's sister.
Sophia: You must be blind.

Quote from Sophia

Blanche: Sophia's home just burned down.
Harry: Oh, that's terrible!
Sophia: Not to me. It was a retirement home, and you know what they did? They set off the fire alarm in a retirement home. Who can rush? Half the people have walkers, the other half can't get out of their chairs. But they got bells going off like crazy. You know what that does to hearts that only beat a few times a week? It's not pretty.

Quote from Dorothy

Rose: Maybe that's why he left, because you forced him into it.
Dorothy: Rose, he left me 38 years later. For a stewardess that he met on a business trip to Hawaii. It was her first flight. They said, "On arrival, give the passengers a lei." She got confused... He got lucky, and they now live on Maui. It's really wonderful. A 65-year-old man with gout learning to windsurf. I hope he trips on his thongs and falls into a volcano.

Quote from Sophia

Dorothy: Ma, Ma, the cab driver said you promised him a $67 tip!
Sophia: Don't be silly. I said a six, seven dollar tip. Why don't these people learn English if they're gonna live here? This is Miami. I'd have less trouble getting around Ecuador.

Quote from Dorothy

Rose: Who's she going out with?
Coco: Harry again.
Dorothy: Harry? Who is this Harry?
Rose: All Blanche said was he still has his own teeth and hair.
Dorothy: Oh, it is wonderful dating in Miami. All the single men under 80 are cocaine smugglers.
Rose: You know, I'd kill to be 20 again.
Dorothy: Oh, I would kill to be 40 again.

Quote from Blanche

Blanche: Oh, Rose, I'm borrowing your earrings. Lord, I'd love to get a face-lift by 8:00.
Dorothy: Blanche, who is Harry?
Blanche: Oh, girls, he's just wonderful. He's very gallant, he's a perfect gentleman, he's a great dancer. And he doesn't make noises when he chews.
Dorothy: Chewing, that's way up there on my list. Comes right after intelligent.
Blanche: He doesn't talk loud at the movies, doesn't take his own pulse, and he's still interested.
Rose: In what?
Dorothy: Rose, if you have to ask, it does not matter anymore.

Quote from Dorothy

Dorothy: Blanche, Blanche, your friend Harry wants an answer tonight. What are you gonna tell him?
Blanche: I haven't decided. I guess I'll know when I hear it come out of my mouth.
Dorothy: You'll know when you hear it come out of your mouth? This isn't a belch, Blanche. This is marriage!

Quote from Dorothy

Rose: You mustn't rush into anything, Blanche. You hardly know him.
Blanche: I just wonder what my husband George would think about me and Harry.
Dorothy: Well, if he was alive, he probably would not like it. But since he's dead, I don't think it poses a problem.
Blanche: I just want him to know that I'm happy, but that I could never be as happy with Harry in the same way as I was with him.
Rose: He knows, Blanche. He knows. Your thoughts and feelings go right to him. You can communicate directly from your heart. Can't you, Dorothy?
Dorothy: Oh, don't ask me. I can't get through to New Jersey with MCI.

Quote from Sophia

Sophia: Hi there.
Dorothy: Ma! Ma, what's the matter?
Sophia: Everyone is fine. No one died. The home burned down.
Dorothy: My God, are you all right? How'd you get here?
Sophia: I hitched.
Dorothy: Oh, Ma!
Sophia: A cab. I took a cab.
Dorothy: Well, you should've called.
Sophia: I'm perfectly capable of managing by myself. I don't need help. I'm a totally independent person.
Dorothy: I know, I know.
Sophia: I need $67 for the cab.

Quote from Sophia

Dorothy: $67? Ma, Ma, this is crazy. The home is 15 minutes from here.
Sophia: My cab driver is Cuban. He said there was an additional tax for a bilingual driver.
Dorothy: I'll take care of him.
Rose: Sit down, Sophia. You must be exhausted.
Sophia: Why? I rode in the cab. I didn't push it.

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