TV Quotes

Blanche: It's gonna be different this time. See, I'm on this drink-it-off diet. "You have two shakes and a sensible meal every day, you lose weight the fast easy way."
Sophia: I prefer the Italian diet. You drink a bottle of wine, make a smart remark, then get your jaw wired.

Rose: Well, maybe tomorrow. Why don't you take a little nap while I fix you something to eat.
Mrs. Lindstrom: Rosie! I'm not a child. I don't need a nap!
Rose: Oh, there's nothing wrong with taking a nap. Bob Hope takes naps.
Sophia: Unless he's in the bedroom now, taking one, I think she'd rather stay here with us.

Rose: Blanche, you dropped these.
Blanche: Oh, thanks.
Dorothy: Men's underwear?
Sophia: Getting a little misty, are you, Pussycat?

Dorothy: Oh, honey, I hope you're not too upset about not fitting in with those dreadful people today.
Blanche: Those small-minded peckerwoods aren't real Southerners. I am a real Southerner. Real Southerners are compassionate people. They're wise and gentle, and they sit around on porch swings, regaling with stories of Abraham and Moses and all the other people who worked on the plantation.

Blanche: I'm just a little depressed. For the first time in my life, I feel over 40.
Dorothy: You know why that is, honey?
Blanche: Why?
Dorothy: Because you're over 50.

Rose: Pepperoni!
Blanche: Uh-oh.
Dorothy: Don't tell Mom.
Rose: That could be an appetizer.
Blanche: Well, this is good. This is all food that would have spoiled.
Dorothy: Oh, boy. I am so glad that my date with Barry is tomorrow. The fat won't have time to show.
Rose: It won't?
Dorothy: No. It always takes a few days before it shows.
Rose: Where does it go in the meantime?
Dorothy: To Connecticut! How do I know where it goes?

Dorothy: I have to go to work, and I don't want you to worry about me. I'm going to say to you what you said to me the very first day you dropped me off at school. "See if you can find someone who looks clean to drive you home."