TV Quotes

Dorothy: Ma, you wear those shoes because they're the only shoes you say you can wear. Whenever we get you other shoes, you say they're uncomfortable.
Sophia: I'm cursed with these square feet. When I was a girl in Sicily, we were too poor for shoes, so I wore olive oil cans.

Rose: Don't you just love waking up with rain tapping on your bedroom window?
Blanche: Oh, absolutely. I always throw open the window, uncork a bottle of Cold Duck and slip into my Frederick's of Hollywood ostrich-feather nightie.
Dorothy: Just because of rain tapping at your window?
Blanche: Oh, I thought she said, "Wayne." My mistake.

Rose: Boy, life sure has a way of throwing you curve balls. When I was younger, I never would have imagined that I'd be worrying about money at this stage of my life.
Dorothy: I used to think Stan would take care of me. I mean, we didn't have much saved, but he was a darn good novelty salesman. Sounds naive now to think that I placed my hopes for the future on a bald pinhead with the morals of a maggot who made his living selling plastic dog-doo. Well, at least I'm not bitter.

Blanche: Why did George cheat on me?
Rose: Why does any man cheat?
Dorothy: Well, there are two popular theories. One, men are victims of an evolutionary process which genetically programs their sexual habits.
Blanche: What's the other theory?
Dorothy: Men are scum.

Dorothy: Ma, what do you think you're doing?
Sophia: Oh, look who's here. Everybody remembers my daughter Dorothy. Or maybe you know her by her Indian name, "Dances With Nobody."

Blanche: What is happening between Sophia and Angela is not unlike an incident which occurred between my sister Virginia and me when we were in high school. Now, can you believe that one's very own sister could seduce her sibling's boyfriend on the eve of that sibling's senior prom?
Dorothy: Virginia did that to you?
Blanche: No, I did that to Virginia. She deserved it. She borrowed my saddle shoes without asking. Well, what are you looking at? She scuffed those shoes. I hardly left a mark on that boy.

Blanche: Oh, girls, girls, can I please share your electric blanket?
Dorothy & Sophia: No.
Blanche: Oh, come on. I can't sleep. My bed's never been so cold. Especially on a Saturday night.