Parks and Recreation Quotes
- Episodes
- Season 1
- Season 2
- Season 3
- Season 4
- Season 5
- Season 6
- Season 7
- 701 2017
- 702 Ron and Jammy
- 703 William Henry Harrison
- 704 Leslie and Ron
- 705 Gryzzlbox
- 706 Save JJ's
- 707 Donna and Joe
- 708 Ms. Ludgate-Dwyer Goes to Washington
- 709 Pie-Mary
- 710 The Johnny Karate Super Awesome Musical Explosion Show
- 711 Two Funerals
- 712 One Last Ride (Part 1)
- 713 One Last Ride (Part 2)
- 714 A Parks and Recreation Special
Parks and Recreation
Parks and Recreation centers on Leslie Knope, a mid-level bureaucrat in the parks department of the fictional town of Pawnee, Indiana, who is determined to use her position to improve the lives of the town's residents.
Starring:
Amy Poehler, Rashida Jones, Aziz Ansari, Nick Offerman, Aubrey Plaza, Chris Pratt, Adam Scott, Rob Lowe, Jim O'Heir, Retta.
Recurring Actors:
Paul Schneider, Billy Eichner, Jay Jackson, Mo Collins, Ben Schwartz, Megan Mullally, Jon Glaser.
Original Run: 2009-2015.
Quote of the Day
Quote from Ron Swanson in Freddy Spaghetti
Ben: With current and projected deficits, we need to cut expenditures by 32%.
Ron Swanson: Let's make it an even 40.
Ben: Oh, that's not necessary.
Ron Swanson: [chanting] Slash it. Slash it.
Florence: Ron, a lot of people are going to lose their jobs. Do you mind trying not to gloat?
Ron Swanson: Yes. I do, Florence. I do mind that. I'm very excited about that. I made penants.
[aside to camera:]
Ron Swanson: I am an official member of a task force dedicated to slashing the city budget. Just saying that gave me a semi.
Popular Quotes
Quote from Ron Swanson in Gin It Up!
Ron Swanson: That's your will? You need that many pages to say, "Give my stuff to my wife"?
Ben: It's a complicated legal document.
Ron Swanson: It doesn't have to be. I've had the same will since I was eight years old.
Ben: "Upon my death, all of my belongings shall transfer to the man or animal who has killed me." What are these weird symbols?
Ron Swanson: The man who kills me will know.
Quote from Ron Swanson in Ms. Knope Goes to Washington
Ranger Patrick: Hey, Ron. You're not going to slaughter that pig here, are you?
Ron Swanson: Not to worry. I have a permit.
Ranger Patrick: This just says, "I can do what I want."
Ron Swanson: I am the director of the Parks Department, and this is a park.
Ranger Patrick: It's not a Parks thing. It's against, like, three laws and a dozen health codes.
Ron Swanson: Fine. Barbecue is postponed until I can go pick up some meat from the Food 'n' Stuff. Let's go, Tom. No, pig Tom. [Donna laughs]
Quote from Ron Swanson in Partridge
Ron Swanson: [aside to camera] Tom and April were excellent witnesses in my defense. Unfortunately, every single word out of their mouths was a lie. There's only one thing I hate more than lying. Skim milk. Which is water that's lying about being milk.
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Trending Quotes
Quote from Chris in Bowling for Votes
Chris: I am taking a probiotic tea break. And while that is happening, I thought I might share some big news. I am going to ask Millicent Gergich to move in with me. D-I... I mean, if that's okay with you of course, Jerry.
Jerry: Uh, yeah. [chuckles] Of course. Sure.
Andy: That's awesome, man. Hey, do you guys wanna live here with us and Ben and champion, the three-legged dog?
Chris: That is an amazing offer.
Andy: Yes!
Chris: But I think we're probably gonna get our own place. I'm already working with a Real Estate agent to find an octagonal house. I've done some reading, and an octagon is the optimal shape for a home in terms of energy flow.
Tom: [aside to camera] I was actually only at my prom for 15 minutes. By the time I got my Armani suit pressed and got the little dimple on my tie just right, it was 11:45 P.M. My date was pretty pissed, but, uh, I looked fly as hell.
Quote from Ron Swanson in Prom
Ron Swanson: [aside to camera] I attended prom with Susan Hofler. Picked her up in my truck, we slow-danced to a Merle Haggard song, and then I left early to go to my shift at the quarry. I was 12 years old. Never went again. Felt like I had outgrown it.