Parks and Recreation Quotes
- Episodes
- Season 1
- Season 2
- Season 3
- Season 4
- Season 5
- Season 6
- Season 7
- 701 2017
- 702 Ron and Jammy
- 703 William Henry Harrison
- 704 Leslie and Ron
- 705 Gryzzlbox
- 706 Save JJ's
- 707 Donna and Joe
- 708 Ms. Ludgate-Dwyer Goes to Washington
- 709 Pie-Mary
- 710 The Johnny Karate Super Awesome Musical Explosion Show
- 711 Two Funerals
- 712 One Last Ride (Part 1)
- 713 One Last Ride (Part 2)
- 714 A Parks and Recreation Special
Parks and Recreation
Parks and Recreation centers on Leslie Knope, a mid-level bureaucrat in the parks department of the fictional town of Pawnee, Indiana, who is determined to use her position to improve the lives of the town's residents.
Starring:
Amy Poehler, Rashida Jones, Aziz Ansari, Nick Offerman, Aubrey Plaza, Chris Pratt, Adam Scott, Rob Lowe, Jim O'Heir, Retta.
Recurring Actors:
Paul Schneider, Billy Eichner, Jay Jackson, Mo Collins, Ben Schwartz, Megan Mullally, Jon Glaser.
Original Run: 2009-2015.
Quote of the Day
Quote from Tom in Campaign Ad
Ben: It's not a negative ad. We're stating facts about him, and, yeah, they happen to be negative because he's a bonehead.
Leslie Knope: Well, I wanted to run an ad that highlights the good things about me, not the bad things about somebody else. Tom, you are our communications director. Weigh in here.
Tom: Leslie, I love your idea. I also love your idea. Two great ideas, two great people.
[aside to camera:]
Tom: I don't know which idea's better, but I do know I'll end up on the winning side. When I bet on horses, I never lose. Why? I bet on all the horses.
Popular Quotes
Quote from Ron Swanson in Gin It Up!
Ron Swanson: That's your will? You need that many pages to say, "Give my stuff to my wife"?
Ben: It's a complicated legal document.
Ron Swanson: It doesn't have to be. I've had the same will since I was eight years old.
Ben: "Upon my death, all of my belongings shall transfer to the man or animal who has killed me." What are these weird symbols?
Ron Swanson: The man who kills me will know.
Quote from Ron Swanson in Ms. Knope Goes to Washington
Ranger Patrick: Hey, Ron. You're not going to slaughter that pig here, are you?
Ron Swanson: Not to worry. I have a permit.
Ranger Patrick: This just says, "I can do what I want."
Ron Swanson: I am the director of the Parks Department, and this is a park.
Ranger Patrick: It's not a Parks thing. It's against, like, three laws and a dozen health codes.
Ron Swanson: Fine. Barbecue is postponed until I can go pick up some meat from the Food 'n' Stuff. Let's go, Tom. No, pig Tom. [Donna laughs]
Quote from Ron Swanson in Partridge
Ron Swanson: [aside to camera] Tom and April were excellent witnesses in my defense. Unfortunately, every single word out of their mouths was a lie. There's only one thing I hate more than lying. Skim milk. Which is water that's lying about being milk.
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Trending Quotes
Quote from Ron Swanson in Anniversaries
Ron Swanson: Can I help you?
Terk: Yeah, I own Lettuce Eat, the vegan restaurant on Lowell Drive, and I wanted to know why you nailed this letter to my door.
[aside to camera:]
Ron Swanson: "Veganism is the sad result of a morally corrupt mind. Reconsider your life."
[back:]
Ron Swanson: Because I believe it. Good day.
Terk: Carnivores. You're all the same.
Quote from April in The Pawnee-Eagleton Tip Off Classic
Ann: I made a special road trip mix CD for us. I hope you like Tori Amos.
April: Oh, cool. [throws CD out the window]
Quote from Ron Swanson in Sweet Sixteen
Ron Swanson: I now officially insist that you take a sabbatical.
Leslie Knope: No, no.
Ron Swanson: Let me finish. I used to work in a sheet metal factory, but then a job came along at the tannery. The hours were better, and I would get paid. Also I'd have the chance to work with leather both before and after it was on the cow, which had always been a dream of mine. I didn't want to give up my sheet metal job, so I tried to do both jobs and finish middle school.
Leslie Knope: How old were you?
Ron Swanson: 11. The point is, I was so tired, I tried to puncture an eight-gauge aluminum foil with a leather awl. [laughs]
Leslie Knope: Wow.
Ron Swanson: I learned a lesson. Never half-ass two things. Whole-ass one thing. So if you want to win that seat--
Leslie Knope: Which I do.
Ron Swanson: Then commit yourself 100%. Take a sabbatical.