April: [aside to camera] These are the Black-eyed Peas. And I finally killed them. It's a Christmas miracle.

Ann: Merry Christmas, Leslie! We made you this replica of the parks department out of gingerbread.
Leslie Knope: Oh, my God, I love it! Aw, I love it, and I love you guys, and Ann specifically. And all of you! You did all of this together?
Ron Swanson: Yes, except for me. Turns out, I cannot make a gingerbread house, which would bother me if I were an 8-year-old girl. In any case, these people stepped up and helped me out, and that gave me another idea. This is the City Council chambers, and that's you, next may.
Leslie Knope: I don't understand.
Ann: Your campaign advisers quit, big deal. You're running for city council again, Leslie, with our help.
April: April Ludgate, youth outreach and director of new media.
Tom: Tom Haverford, image consultant, swagger coach.
Ann: Ann Perkins, office manager and volunteer coordinator.
Andy: Andy Dwyer, security, sweets, body man. Javelin, if need be.
Donna: Donna Meagle, transpo, AKA rides in my Benz.
Jerry: W- You guys didn't tell me we were doing this. I--I did not know that I was supposed to come up with something. I--
Ron Swanson: Ron Swanson, any other damn thing you might need.
Leslie Knope: Guys, it's so much work. I can't ask you to put your lives on hold.
Ron Swanson: Find one person here who you haven't helped by putting your life on hold.
Leslie Knope: [choked up] I don't know what to say... Except... Let's go win an election! [cheers and applause]

Ron Swanson: [aside to camera] Every year, I give Leslie the same present I give everyone: A crisp $20 bill. And every year, she gets me something thoughtful and personal. It makes me furious. This year, she outdid herself.
[clicks button; Ron's office doors close] She had it installed over the weekend. It's so-- [chokes up] It's so beautiful.

William Barnes: Well, before the scandal, you were at 26%. Now, we knew we'd take a hit, but we figured as long as we're at 15% or above, we're still in the fight.
Leslie Knope: And we're at 15%? We went back to 26%? Whoa, wait. 50%?
Elizabeth: We're at one.
Leslie Knope: One... hundred?
William Barnes: You're polling at 1%.
Leslie Knope: What? No. That can't be right. Okay, well, what we do is we move forward from this. How do we put a positive spin on this?
Elizabeth: There's no way to spin this.
Leslie Knope: Sure there is. You're looking at the glass like it's 99% empty. I'm looking at it like it's 1% full. You know, the last delicious sip of a milkshake at the bottom of the metal milkshakey thing?

Chris: Ron filled me in on everything that happened, and I really wish that the ethics investigation hadn't interfered with your campaign in any way.
Leslie Knope: You don't have to apologize. You were very fair. In fact, I'm the one that needs to apologize. I got you involved in PCP. But I'm starting a new group now, LSD - Leslie's Sorry Division - and I just want to say I'm sorry, Chris.

Leslie Knope: It's so nice to be able to sit here in public and have breakfast with you.
Ben: Yeah.
Leslie Knope: In a way, my suspension from work was kind of a blessing.
Ben: Yeah, I feel the same way about resigning in disgrace.

Leslie Knope: You have a big day. What's this interview for?
Ben: It's a job doing in-house accounting work for an accounting firm, so... could be pretty interesting.
Leslie Knope: Yeah, sounds interesting.
Ben: You know, if I hadn't resigned in disgrace, I might never have explored the private sector. It's like, why didn't I resign in disgrace 12 years ago?
Leslie Knope: You might want to stop saying "resigned in disgrace." Especially during job interviews.
Ben: Good call.

Ben: Mmm, I love me a calzone.

Chris: Leslie Knope!
Leslie Knope: Hey, Chris! Wow, is that a new jogging shirt?
Chris: It is! It's an experimental fabric called bumble-flex. It's made out of synthetic bees' wings.
Leslie Knope: That's cool.

Ann: Leslie wishes she could be here herself to give you these presents, but she's suspended. Oh, and also she said that they're not from her, they're from Santa Claus.
Andy: Can I go first? [gasps]
[aside to camera:]
Andy: Mouse Rat, certified gold! Over 100 copies sold in Pawnee! I need to get a picture of me holding this so I can frame it.