Parks and Recreation Quote of the Day

Saturday, March 25, 2023

Quote from Leslie Knope in Farmers Market

Leslie Knope: Ben, do something.
Ben: What do you want me to do?
Leslie Knope: Well, you're the city manager. Kick them out. They're violating every single one of the Farmers Market's rules of conduct.
Ben: By "rules of conduct," do you mean that wooden sign you made that says, "Peas be kind to others"?
Leslie Knope: Yes, and "In case of fire, romaine calm," and "You won't bay leaf how nice olive our vendors are." I don't like vegetables, but I'm very good at vegetable puns.


Recent Quotes

Friday, March 24, 2023

Quote from Ron Swanson in Correspondents' Lunch

Ann: Sorry, the door was open.
Ron Swanson: I wish this office had only walls.

Thursday, March 23, 2023

Quote from Chris in Bus Tour

Chris: [aside to camera while cycling] This has been a difficult year for me, romantically. Millicent Gergich, Ann Perkins, Andy's professor-- lots of disappointment, but if I keep my body moving and my mind occupied at all times, I will avoid falling into a bottomless pit of despair.

Wednesday, March 22, 2023

Quote from Tom in Ron and Tammys

Ben: Look, you guys can swagger around all you want, but businesses need revenue, okay? Unless you start working on an actual plan, you're dead in a month. That's a fact.
Tom: Ben, thanks for your time. But with all due respect, as far as business decisions go, I think we know what we're doing. Don't forget to grab a free iPad on your way out. [Ben walks away] He didn't even have one.

Tuesday, March 21, 2023

Quote from Ron Swanson in I'm Leslie Knope

Ron Swanson: You know, when I was 12, my brother shot me in the pinky toe with a nail gun. Granted, it was a hilarious prank, and we all had a good laugh.
Leslie Knope: That's awful.
Ron Swanson: But I avoided going to the doctor. I hate paperwork. After a few weeks, the toe just kinda fell off. Leslie Knope: You only have nine toes?
Ron Swanson: I have the toes I have. Let's just leave it at that. The point is the doctor said if I had come in right away, they might've saved the toe. You can't run away from your problems.
Leslie Knope: Especially if you only have nine toes. Sorry. That was uncalled for.
Ron Swanson: I'm Ron Swanson. And you're Leslie [bleep] Knope. You with me?

Monday, March 20, 2023

Quote from Leslie Knope in The Camel

Leslie Knope: He likes the shapes, okay? And he's part of the team. So, here. Take these scissors and cut out your favorite shapes. And then we'll put them on a new team mural. We're going to make a new design that takes the best parts of all of our designs.
[aside to camera:]
Leslie Knope: It's like if you got Michelangelo and Andy Warhol and Jackson Pollock and Jim Davis from Garfield to do one painting. Imagine how good that painting would be.

Sunday, March 19, 2023

Quote from Ron Swanson in Live Ammo

Ron Swanson: [aside to camera] All told, we were in there about six hours. And no, I was not meditating. I just stood there, quietly breathing. There were no thoughts in my head whatsoever. My mind was blank. I don't know what the hell these other crackpots are doing.

Upcoming Quotes

Sunday, March 26, 2023

A quote from Ben in the episode Flu Season.

Monday, March 27, 2023

A quote from Leslie Knope in the episode The Cones of Dunshire.

Tuesday, March 28, 2023

A quote from Ron Swanson in the episode Flu Season 2.

Wednesday, March 29, 2023

A quote from Tom in the episode The Cones of Dunshire.

Thursday, March 30, 2023

A quote from Jerry in the episode Park Safety.