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‘Moving Up (Part 2)’ Quotes

Parks and Recreation: Moving Up (Part 2)

622. Moving Up (Part 2)

Aired April 24, 2014

As the Unity Concert continues, Leslie finds out she can take two employees with her to Chicago. After the faltering first night, Tom wants his restaurant to hit the ground running with a concert after-party.

Quote from Andy

Andy: Also, can you bring back Power Rangers? I don't know what it is you do, but you seem important enough to get that done.


Quote from Andy

Andy: Well, how about this Unity concert, huh, Pawnee? [cheers and applause] I love this town so much, and I'm just so proud to live here. And we're gonna close tonight out with a tribute to Pawnee's greatest treasure. [sings] Up in horsey heaven, here's the thing You trade your legs for angel's wings And once we've all said good-bye You take a running leap, and you learn to fly
All: Bye-bye, Li'l Sebastian I miss you in the saddest fashion Bye-bye, Li'l Sebastian You're 5,000 candles in the wind.
Andy: Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Duke Silver!
Ron Swanson: [plays sax solo]
All: Bye-bye, Li'l Sebastian I miss you in the saddest fashion Bye-bye, Li'l Sebastian You're 5,000 candles in the wind

Quote from Craig

Ron Swanson: Guys, this is the most important night of my life, which means it's the most important night of your lives too.
Craig: Speak for yourself. I once got into a cab that Kyra Sedgwick was getting out of.
Jean-Ralphio: No way, The Closer? Oof!

Quote from Donna

Tom: Ginuwine, it is an honor to be breathing the same air as you. No joke. But real talk... we're both men about town being constantly bombarded with party invitations.
Ginuwine: Who is this guy?
Donna: My friend who's opening a restaurant tonight, and you're going to be there, cousin, unless you want me to get onstage and talk about how we used to take baths together, how you cried whenever I took away your rubber duckies.
Ginuwine: Damn, Donna. Why you got to bring the Quackson 5 into this?
[on stage:]
Ginuwine: How y'all doing? [cheers and applause] Li'l Sebastian, this one is for you, because you're my pony.

Quote from Ron Swanson

Leslie Knope: Ron, I have to ask you something, and I want you to consider it, okay? Really consider it. How would you feel about leaving Pawnee and moving to Chicago?
Ron Swanson: [laughing]
Leslie Knope: Hold on, come on, I'm not done. You'd be working for the federal government.
Ron Swanson: [laughing]
Leslie Knope: You know what, excuse me for wanting my dear friend and ethical mentor to accompany me on the adventure of a lifetime.
Ron Swanson: It's very sweet, Leslie, and the National Parks Service is probably the only branch of government worth a damn, but Diane and I are quite happy raising our family here. Now, if you'll excuse me, there's a booth over there serving something called, "fried sausage quilts," so I'm going to buy the booth.

Quote from Ron Swanson

Zoey Lewis: Daddy, you should play music.
Diane Lewis: Yeah, Ron. Go on. Get up there. Have some fun.
Ron Swanson: I recalibrated the sights on all the rifles in the shooting gallery. I've had enough fun for one day. [sniffing]
Diane Lewis: Oh, I know that look. Where is she?
Ron Swanson: She's near. Hide the children.

Quote from Tammy Two

Tammy Two: Hello, Ron. Hello, Ron's friend.
Ron Swanson: Tammy, what could possibly bring you to a children's performance... preparing a ritual sacrifice of a newborn?
Tammy Two: No, just trolling for some daddy. Oh, sorry. I pronounced that wrong. Trolling for some dad "D."
Ron Swanson: Diane, why don't you take the girls for some ice cream while I dispose of this sewer-dwelling gutter witch?
Diane Lewis: Bye, Tammy. Always a pleasure.
Tammy Two: You're not fooling me, Ron. This little domestic charade of yours hasn't changed you one bit. You're still the same old Ron Swanson, and I will defeat you. I will defeat you right into my pants.

Quote from Andy

Burly: Hey, listen, man, I'm really sorry things ended so weird with Mouse Rat. You know, that's not really how I pictured us breaking up, you know.
Andy: Yeah, I do know. I always figured we'd... you know, whatever... break up 'cause I got drafted by the Colts. And then in the first game, of course, I'd break my leg. Crowd starts chanting my name, and I give 'em the thumbs-up. And then I'd go to the hospital. I'd get really good at chess. I end up beating the computer finally, and then the band just sort of drifts apart. That was how I saw it, but...
Burly: Yeah.
Andy: Take it easy.

Quote from Joan Callamezzo

Tom: Can I get you a drink?
Joan Callamezzo: I'll have the Joan. It's a tumbler of gin, and it's got crushed aspirin around the rim.
Perd Hapley: And I would just like an empty glass.

Quote from Ben

Barney: Hi, Ben. [chuckles] It's me, Barney, from the accounting firm.
Ben: Yes. Hi, Barney. You don't have to introduce yourself every time.
Barney: I was gonna wait until your birthday to give this to you, but I'm just too excited.
Ben: This is the copyright to Cones of Dunshire.
Barney: After you gave it to us as a gift, we saw its potential, so we formed a "C" corp and registered it in your name.
Ben: This is amazing. How can I ever repay you?
Barney: Come work for us at the accounting firm.
Ben: Okay.
Barney: Oh! ( Laughs ) Oh!
Ben: No, sorry. I can't.
Barney: Wow. Shortest one yet.
Ben: Thank you.

Quote from Tom

Tom: This is amazing. Practically everyone we invited came, except for Liam Hemsworth and Miley Cyrus. I was hoping tonight would be magical enough to get 'em back together.
Craig: Let it go, friend. He's not good enough for her, and vice versa!

Quote from Ron Swanson

Ron Swanson: You look sad, Knope. Couldn't find any takers for Chicago?
Leslie Knope: Everybody turned me down but Larry.
Ron Swanson: Ouch.
Leslie Knope: Yeah.
Ron Swanson: Well, cheer up. You got a new job, new challenges, all that crap you like.
Leslie Knope: Man, I'm gonna miss Pawnee. I wish I could stay, you know, keep an eye on it, raise my kids here. And let's be honest, am I ever gonna find a better breakfast than JJ's Diner?
Ron Swanson: You will not, no. I know it's not easy to leave, but this job does seem perfect. Of course, I'd prefer you use your talents elsewhere. You know, with your courage and small frame, you'd make an excellent coal miner.
Leslie Knope: Thank you, Ron. That's very sweet.

Quote from Leslie Knope

Ron Swanson: It's time for you to move up in the world. Your ambition was bound to take you away from the town you love sooner or later, and you can't have everything you want.
Leslie Knope: Oh, my God. [laughs] I can have everything I want! Thank you.
Ron Swanson: I feel like you're not listening to me.
Leslie Knope: Oh, and by the way, don't think that we are not discussing Duke Silver. When were you going to tell me about that? Unbelievable! I am so furious at you, but I've already forgiven you, and you need to teach me how to play the saxophone. Okay, bye.

Quote from Leslie Knope

Leslie Knope: [aside to camera in a barren office] Sometimes you have to make the hardest climb to see the most beautiful sunrise. I read that once on an old lady's decorative pillow. But it is really how I feel today. I've climbed a very weird and rocky mountain, and it was a pain in the ass, and my legs are tired, and I'm starving, but the sun is rising over a sea of love and waffles and possibility. So I'm just gonna relax and take a deep breath and enjoy this view for as long as I possibly can.

Quote from Leslie Knope

[three years later:]
Leslie Knope: Call Ken and Rebecca, and no statements to the press unless I personally release them. We are on a media lockdown. Where is Ed with the file? Ed!
Ed: I'm sorry, Miss Knope, I lost the file. It's gone.
Leslie Knope: Ed, you're a nice guy, but you're the most incompetent person I've ever worked with, and that includes Terry.
Jerry: Jeez! Get it together, Terry.
Leslie Knope: Clean out your desk. You're fired.
Ed: I understand. Thank you for the literally hundreds of opportunities you've given me. Good-bye, everyone. It's been a great three years.
Leslie Knope: Cancel my flight to South Dakota. We'll do it next month. Babe, what's our play here?
Ben: Everyone's waiting downstairs in my office. Let's just go hear what they have to say.
Leslie Knope: But honey, tonight's your big night.
Ben: No, this is more important. Where are the kids?
April: Right here.
Leslie Knope: Hey, guys! Mommy and daddy had to do a little work, and you're gonna have a fun play date with Uncle Andy and Aunty April, okay?
Andy: Let's go, munchkins. I forgot, Ben... how many bags of marshmallows do I give them?
Ben: None! Just let April do everything.
Leslie Knope: One day, in the distant future, things will be calm and normal, right?
Ben: Probably not. But that's okay. You ready?
Leslie Knope: Not at all. But that's never stopped us before.

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