Previous Episode Next Episode 

‘I, Bowl Buster’ Quotes Page 1 of 2

The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air: I, Bowl Buster

616. I, Bowl Buster

Aired February 26, 1996

When Carlton finally gets accepted at Princeton, he freaks about measuring up to Uncle Phil.

Quote from Will

Will: Your son is about to throw his life away and all you can say is "fine"?
Philip: Look, if I stop him from bowling, I will be doing exactly what he's accusing me of. He just needs a little space. He will get over this.
Will: Uncle Phil, man, I think we need to nip this thing in the bud.
Philip: Oh, it's just a phase, Will. Just a phase.
Will: Just a phase? We worked our fingers to the bone to put him through school. He's about to throw it all away and I'm the only one who wants to do anything? It is a sad, sad day when Will Smith becomes the voice of reason.

Rate

Quote from Will

Will: Hey, G, come on, man. Can I get some spare change?
Geoffrey: No. Use your own money.
Will: G, come on. It's dime-a-frame bowling day. It's always more fun when you use other people's dimes.
Geoffrey: For the last time, Master William, I have no spare change.
Will: What about that piggy bank in your closet under them issues of Big Butted Butler Babes? That was just a lucky guess, man.

Quote from Hilary

Hilary: Here is the church. Here is the steeple. Open the door and... Where are all the people?!

Quote from Hilary

Hilary: Why didn't anyone remind me that I hate children?
Philip: My God, Hilary, what happened to you?
Hilary: I went on a nature walk with those little blue people. It was awful. We were startled by a deer, swarmed by butterflies. And I have such a headache from that babbling brook.

Quote from Hilary

Will: Oh, Hil, why so blue?
Hilary: Ha, ha. I volunteered to spend the weekend with a flock of Blue Birds.
Will: Well, just keep them away from my car. I just got it waxed.
Hilary: They're not real birds. They're like Girl Scouts. And I am the honorary Hen Mother.
Philip: Hilary, that's wonderful. What do you have planned?
Hilary: Planned? I don't know. I thought I'd just watch them run around.
Philip: Sweetheart, I think groups like this usually like to do outdoorsy things. You know, like camping, hiking, horseback riding.
Hilary: They do? Oh.

Quote from Carlton

Philip: Oh. A Afro pick. I wonder who this belonged to.
Carlton: Hey, look, it's Dad's Phi Beta Kappa key.
Will: Man, look, defensive player of the year.
Carlton: Wow, look at all this stuff. Valedictorian, voted most popular, captain of the debating team.
Will: Yo, Uncle Phil was just straight up the man around that joint.
Carlton: Oh, my God. He's shaking hands with President Johnson. Will, I don't know if I can do this.
Will: I don't think you wanna be shaking hands with President Johnson right now.
Carlton: That's not what I mean. I mean, I knew Dad was, you know, a big deal and everything, but my God, how do you follow this?
Will: Carlton, what are you talking about?
Carlton: Well, as hard as I work and as well as I do the best that I'll ever be is not quite as good as Dad. I don't know if I can do this. I don't know if I could ever fill Dad's shoes. I don't know if I could ever be... good enough.

Quote from Will

Will: Hey, hey, hey. What's all the noise, Big Birds?
Girl Scout: It's not Big Birds, Big Ears. It's Blue Birds.
Will: Big Ears. That's funny. I'm gonna remember that when cookie time roll around.

Quote from Geoffrey

Hilary: Oh, Geoffrey, who am I kidding? I can't do any of this. I've even heard rumblings that I'm not any fun.
Geoffrey: Nonsense, Miss Hilary. Now, Master Carlton, he's no fun. But you're a splendid young lady with a lot to offer. If you just pick something you like and are good at those girls will have a wonderful time with you.
Hilary: Geoffrey, do you really mean that?
Geoffrey: No. It just seemed the right thing to say.

Quote from Will

Will: What happened to the guy whose biggest dream was to go to Princeton University?
Carlton: Look, I used to have a lot of dreams, Will. I used to dream that I was being chased by hot dogs and doughnuts. But it's just a dream. It means nothing. This is reality.
Will: Carlton, this isn't reality. This is stupid.
Carlton: Will, my dad supports me. Why can't you?
Will: Your dad isn't thinking straight. The man's hopped up on a 25-year-old Twinkie.

Quote from Hilary

Philip: Hilary, how's it going with your little Blue Birds?
Hilary: Terrific. We finally found something that we can really connect on. Where are they? Come on, girls. Hurry it up. Last one in the sauna is gonna get clogged pores.

Quote from Will

Philip: Like I said the best thing we can do is just to steer clear of him.
Will: Uh-huh. Okay. Well, see I kind of took a different approach. I kind of, like, steered right at him, you know what I'm saying? You know, I think I may have strengthened his resolve to throw his whole life away. But I just wanna say to you, I don't think that should affect our relationship.
Philip: What are you talking about?
Will: Oh, so you need further elaboration. Well, see, Uncle Phil, now, you know I know I can beat Carlton at any sport, right? But then I had found out bowling ain't no sport. Shh. You know, so Carlton's not going to Princeton. He's going to join the PBA. I'm gonna go get a grub, want me to make you something?
Philip: Will, I find out that you contributed to my son not going to Princeton you will be picking my shoe leather out of...

Quote from Philip

Philip: Son, I think it's about time we had a little talk.
Carlton: Oh, I think we should.
Will: You're darn skippy, we should. You're darn skippy y'all should.
Philip: Carlton, you're right. It's always been my dream for you to go to Princeton. But it's been yours also. I never pushed you.
Carlton: I know. I just freaked out. When I got accepted and you brought down that box of achievements I just realized that I could never measure up to you. I got scared.
Philip: Son, this is not a competition. And it's perfectly natural for you to feel the pressure and get mixed up and start bowling. But bowling never solves anything, it just makes things worse.

Quote from Carlton

Will: Better watch yourself, boy. Here I come. Penny, down low to Shaq. Shaq, back out to Penny for three. Boom, in Clyde's face. Ten bucks. Now give me my money, Pee Wee.
Carlton: Come on, double or nothing. This time, you're going down.
Philip: I can't believe you two, wasting your time. Aren't you both a little old to be playing video games?
Carlton: This isn't just a video game, Dad. This is the new 32-bit super system with digitized sound, VGA graphics and full-motion video.
Will: Yo, and it's real cool too.

Quote from Will

Geoffrey: This has just arrived for you, Master Carlton. It's from Princeton.
Philip: Princeton? Open it up.
Carlton: I can't. What if it's a rejection?
Will: You've been rejected your whole life. You should be used to it by now.

Quote from Philip

Philip: Pa-yow! Passes down the court. There he goes. Blinding speed. Goes up for the lay... Ha, ha. Well, you see, you two left the TV on, and... And, well, I, you know You want a piece of me?

Next Page 

 Previous Episode Next Episode 
  View another episode