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‘Viva Lost Wages’ Quotes Page 1 of 2

The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air: Viva Lost Wages

608. Viva Lost Wages

Aired November 13, 1995

Will joins Carlton as he celebrates his 21st birthday in Las Vegas. Meanwhile, Vivian, Hilary and Ashley have a girls' weekend.

Quote from Carlton

Carlton: [v.o.] Somebody pinch me. I'm in the same city with Tom Jones, Wayne Newton, and Engelbert Humperdinck. So many shows, so little time. Ugh.

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Quote from Hilary

Hilary: I just know that one day Thelma and Louise will make it to the other side of the canyon.

Quote from Carlton

Carlton: All right, I get it. We'll gamble for about an hour or so, but then we have to hit the hay. We don't wanna miss sunrise at Hoover Dam. They say it starts out mauve.
Will: You're an odd little man, aren't you?

Quote from Nicky

Will: So this is what you wanna do, huh? You think you want some of me, huh? Let's go.
Nicky: Blackjack.
Will: Man, that's three in a row. I should be taking you to Vegas with me instead of Carlton.
Nicky: Yeah, yeah, whatever. Pay the man.

Quote from Will

Philip: Okay, guys. Here you go. Here are your airplane tickets and your hotel confirmation.
Carlton: Thanks, Dad. This is gonna be the greatest birthday present ever. Yeah, it's a shame you have to go to Sacramento.
Philip: Oh, I know. I know. But, son, this isn't just a birthday, this is your 21st birthday. And this isn't just a trip, it's a rite of passage. You know, the Cheyenne Indians used to take a young brave and leave him in the desert and he'd have to fend for himself with nothing but a knife. But when he left that desert, he was a man.
Will: There's certainly some places in this desert where a brother can become a man, you know... I don't know where none of them at, you know, you know, but I'm gonna go ahead and get my knife.

Quote from Geoffrey

Philip: Okay, ladies, I'm leaving. They don't hear you, sir.
Geoffrey: They've begun their women's weekend. Right now, they're in phase one. Chick flicks and mint Milanos.
Philip: I said, I'm leaving.
[Vivian, Hilary and Ashley go up an kiss Philip without taking their eyes off the TV]
Geoffrey: Well, it's not like you're going off to war, sir.

Quote from Vivian

Hilary: "You're at a friend's house for Christmas dinner and you find a dead cockroach in your salad. What do you do?"
Vivian: I eat around it, because cockroaches go straight to my thighs.
Ashley: I'd switch plates with Carlton.

Quote from Hilary

Ashley: Okay, Hilary, it's your turn. I'll ask you a question. "Would it bother you much if upon your death your body was simply thrown into the woods and abandoned?"
Hilary: Does it say what I'm wearing?

Quote from Geoffrey

Ashley: Okay, Geoffrey, fine. A question for you. "If you could use a voodoo doll to hurt anyone you chose, would you?"
Geoffrey: Miss Ashley, if it hasn't worked by now...
Hilary: Aah!
Geoffrey: Perhaps it's kicking in.

Quote from Hilary

Hilary: No, I saw a mouse.
Ashley: Are you sure?
Hilary: Of course, I'm sure.
Ashley: What'd it look like?
Hilary: Like Mickey, only without the big white gloves.

Quote from Carlton

Will: Come on, aren't you gonna bet something?
Carlton: Yes, I put $5 on red and 5 on black.
Will: Carlton, that'll cancel your bet out. You can't win like that.
Carlton: Maybe so, but I can't lose either.
Will: Well, not unless it comes up...
Dealer: Double zero, green.

Quote from Hilary

Ashley: Okay, tell me something. Now, are all men hard of hearing or is it just that they don't wanna listen to anything we have to say?
Vivian: Right. We have to listen until we're blue in the face about cars, sports money, their precious careers, and then if we wanna talk about something that's really important to us, they can't be bothered.
Hilary: Wait, how about this? How about when they never listen? [scoffs]

Quote from Carlton

Carlton: You know what that is?
Nicky: Irritating.
Carlton: It's energy generated by the most awesome source of natural power in the world.
Will: What, the static from Uncle Phil's corduroys?
Carlton: The Hoover Dam. Here, I got you this book so when we get to Vegas, you'll be Hoover savvy.
Will: I'm getting goose bumps.
Carlton: You too?

Quote from Will

Will: [v.o.] I can't believe I'm in the same city as Girls, Girls, Girls. Oh! So many shows, so little time.

Quote from Will

Will: Whoo-hoo! Bells ringing, money flowing. We are certainly not in Kansas anymore. Oh, Auntie Em, Dorothy got a miniskirt on.

Quote from Will

Carlton: We've entered the world of temptation. A word to the wise, beware.
Will: All right, here's the plan. First, we split up...
Carlton: And?
Will: That's it. We just split up.

Quote from Carlton

Carlton: Change for a dollar, please. There's a $5 minimum, sir.
Dealer: Outrageous. We're out of here, Will.
Will: Whoa, wait a minute, Carlton. Relax, man. Can I get change for 100, please?
Carlton: A hundred? Are you insane?
Dealer: Change 100.
Carlton: See, she can't believe it either.

Quote from Will

Will: Hey, Carlton. Oh, man, you are never gonna believe this. Let me tell you, I'm at this crap table, right? It's crazy. I'm just barking numbers like, boom, seven, boom, 11. The crowd is going crazy. The girls are like, "Willy Smith, is that you?" I'm like, "Who you think it is?" They're going crazy. They all love me. I'm throwing back doors, yos, Little Joes, all that kind of stuff. I'm just straight jacking the casino for their loot. Man, I was like a crap Mandingo.
Carlton: So, what happened?
Will: Hey, can you spot a brother 20?

Quote from Carlton

Will: I cannot believe you froze me up right in the middle of my comeback.
Carlton: Hi, my name is Will Smith, and I'm a gambleholic.
Will: Carlton, come on, man. Didn't you feel the juice?
Carlton: Will, that's the devil's juice.
Will: I'm about to have me some of the devil's eggs and bacon too.
Carlton: Very funny, Will. Now hand it over.
Will: What?
Carlton: You were right there when Dad said it. "Keep an eye on Will. Make sure he doesn't get out of control.
Make sure he doesn't drink the devil's juice."
Will: Man, he ain't say none of that.

Quote from Will

Carlton: Now let's get some shuteye.
Will: Look, man, I ain't tired.
Carlton: Do you want to miss Hoover Dam?
Will: Hoover Dam. [giddily jumps into bed]

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