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‘Talking Turkey’ Quotes Page 1 of 4    

The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air: Talking Turkey

112. Talking Turkey

Aired November 19, 1990

When Will's mother, Vy (Vernee Watson), comes to town for Thanksgiving, she thinks the kids have it too easy.

Quote from Vy

Vy: Well, honey, I don't mean to be critical but I don't like what I saw today. Will's got a bunch of grown men doing all the work he should be doing. I haven't seen him lift a finger except to scratch his head.
Vivian: You're not being fair, Vy. Will works very hard at his homework.
Vy: Back home, Will did his homework, mowed the lawn, raked the leaves and cleared the table. I don't think a little work around the house is gonna interfere with his education. From what I see, all he's learning is how to be a rich kid.
Vivian: Philip and I just want Will to have the same advantages that our kids have. I mean, isn't that why you sent him out here?
Vy: I sent him out here to stay out of trouble and get a good education. But, Vivian, I also taught that boy the value of hard work and I don't want him to lose that. All I know is the kids in this house are getting a free ride. A free ride in a fancy car. But I don't mean to be critical.

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Quote from Vy

Vy: Look at my boy. You really have changed.
Will: Yeah, I'm handsome.
Vy: No, you haven't changed. I hope he's not eating you out of house and home?
Vivian: Not at all.
Vy: [to Phil] He's certainly not taking any food out of your mouth.
Philip: Starting already. I don't believe it.
Will: [laughs] That's a good one, Mama. I got to use that one.
Vy: No, you don't make fun of your uncle. That's my job.

Quote from Vy

Hilary: What should I do with these bowls?
Vy: Just put them in the dishwasher.
Hilary: Here? [Carlton shrugs his shoulders]
Ashley: Well, let's just take them up to Geoffrey's room. He'll know what to do with them.
Vy: Lord, have mercy. Just leave them here. I'll take care of them. Now, go on. Honestly, I've never seen such a lazy bunch in my life and I work at the post office.

Quote from Vy

Vivian: How's everything at the post office?
Vy: They made me a supervisor.
Vivian: That's wonderful.
Vy: Honey, they make everybody at the post office a supervisor. You practically have to eat the mail not to get promoted.

Quote from Geoffrey

Geoffrey: "And so the men and women of Plymouth Colony sat at a long table with their new-found Indian friends to celebrate the first Thanksgiving. And at the head of the table, the leader of the pilgrims folded his hands, bowed his head and said--"
Will: [sings] Oh do me baby Do the humpty hump Do the humpty hump Oh dooo doo Do-o-o-o whoo
Geoffrey: And then the village idiot interrupted the prayer ruining the feast for one and all.

Quote from Philip

Vivian: Will, I bet you can't wait till your mom gets here.
Will: Oh, yeah. Thanks a lot for flying her out, Aunt Viv.
Vivian: We had to convince her to accept the ticket. She never lets us spend a penny on her.
Philip: Apparently, that's not a genetic trait.

Quote from Hilary

Vivian: Now, for Thanksgiving do you want to try something different or the traditional turkey?
Hilary: Mother, I have a big problem with turkey.
Ashley: What's wrong with it?
Hilary: Ashley, honey, from the moment they are hatched to the moment they're shrink-wrapped, turkeys are raised to be food, and nothing but food.
Will: Hilary, sweetheart, I don't think too many of them had aspirations to be doctors or lawyers.

Quote from Will

Will: All right, these are your assignments. I'll do the turkey. Ashley, you do the cranberry sauce. Carlton, you do the stuffing. Hilary, you do the yams and the rolls.
Hilary: Oh, I get two things? Why don't you just put a yoke around my neck and hitch me to a plow?
Will: [laughs] Hilary, I don't think it would be the worst thing in the world if you guys did some work around here. I mean, you guys are getting a fancy ride. A fancy ride in a free car.

Quote from Philip

Philip: Boy, holiday traffic is starting already. People are in such a lousy mood. I learned five new words on the way home.
Ashley: Did you know what they meant?
Philip: I think so, Ashley. They were accompanied by very helpful hand gestures.

Quote from Vy

Carlton: Aunt Vi.
Vy: Oh, my goodness, aren't you handsome? And looking less and less like your daddy every day.
Carlton: Ouch. Run for cover, Dad.
Will: Where's he going to hide at?

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