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‘Boxing Helena’ Quotes Page 1 of 2

The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air: Boxing Helena

612. Boxing Helena

Aired January 8, 1996

Will, Carlton, Hilary and Nicky follow through on their New Year's resolutions by joining a gym. Will is embarrassed when a female boxing trainer beats him up.

Quote from Nicky

Will: Never in the history of pugilistic pursuit has one so completely dominated. Muhammad, what do you have to say?
Nicky: I'm the greatest and I'm pretty. You know I made you, Howard.
Philip: What is going on here?
Will: Oh, you know, the family vowed to get in shape for the new year, so we gonna go to the gym. I'm gonna take Nicky and put him in a boxing class.
Philip: Oh, that's fine. Just make sure he learns that boxing is about athleticism and sportsmanship, not violence.
Nicky: [punching the inflatable] Now I'm gonna get medieval on you.
Will: We ain't really get to the sportsmanship part yet.

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Quote from Philip

Will: Well, hey, Uncle Phil, why don't you come to the gym with us?
Philip: Oh, I'd love to, I really would, but I have so much work to do on the trial this morning.
Will: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Philip: Okay, okay, fine. I'm not going because I don't want to. And you can't make me.

Quote from Geoffrey

Carlton: Geoffrey, what do you think? Honestly.
Geoffrey: I think it's the most ridiculous costume I've ever seen.
[Ashley comes downstairs in her hot dog uniform]
Geoffrey: I stand corrected.
Will: Hey, Ashley. All ready for your first day at work?
Ashley: What was I thinking telling Daddy I'd pay for half my car? I feel like a dork. And I have to wear this same stupid uniform day after day after day.
Geoffrey: Gee, wouldn't that suck?

Quote from Will

Will: Hey, hey, Nicky. Got you all signed up for your boxing lesson. So I'll meet you over by the ring later?
Nicky: Okay. I'm gonna float like a butterfly and stink like a bee.
Will: That's close enough, all right.

Quote from Hilary

Hilary: Will, how do you turn these on?
Will: You gotta work them yourself, Hil.
Hilary: Oh. Ew! I'm starting to sweat.

Quote from Will

Will: Big Nick, what's up, man? How's your boxing lesson?
Nicky: Great. Helena said I was the best in the class.
Will: Helena? Wait a minute, you're the boxing instructor?
Helena: You got a problem with that?
Will: Oh, no, no. You know, cute little gloves, nice tight little outfit. Works for you, cutie.
Helena: Now, there's a typical male attitude.
Will: Oh, no, no, no. No disrespect. I'm just saying, you know, female boxers ain't exactly common. Ain't nobody ever heard of Muhammad Ali Sheedy, you know. You know, it's Sonny Liston, it's not Sonny and Cher Liston. You know what I'm saying.

Quote from Philip

Philip: So how you feeling, Will?
Will: Not great.
Philip: Son, there's a lesson to be learned here. Just because you got defeated by a, heh, woman, doesn't make you any less of a man.
Will: Yeah, I know that, Uncle Phil.
Philip: I mean, I can understand your being embarrassed by being clocked by someone half your size, but you'll get past it.
Will: I'm feeling better already.
Philip: The sheer humiliation alone...
Will: You know, I get it, Uncle Phil.

Quote from Hilary

Hilary: I have my whole agenda planned. First, I have an apple wrap then a hot-oil massage, finishing with an aroma-therapy facial. I'll be lucky if I'm able to walk tomorrow.

Quote from Will

Will: Big Nick, what's up, man?
Nicky: I'm working on the model I got for Christmas.
Will: Oh, yeah, I wish I got a model for Christmas. Mm! Five-nine, 120. You know, bloo-bloo-blap-blap! Boom!
Nicky: Wouldn't that be hard to put together?
Will: I'm just kidding, Nick. Don't worry. Here, let me help you with this model.
Nicky: It's pretty complicated, Will.
Will: Please, boy, I was putting models together before you was born. Come on, pass me that glue.
Nicky: It's pretty strong stuff, Will.
Will: [scoffs]
[cut to Will with pieces of the model glued all over his body]

Quote from Hilary

Hilary: So how do I look?
Will: Hilary, we're going to the gym.
Hilary: Oh, you're right, fluorescent lights. I should put on more blush.

Quote from Carlton

Carlton: [sings] I'm a maniac, maniac on the floor I'm a maniac, maniac
Will: You're an idiot.
Carlton: This is the latest design in workout wear. Gore-Tex, breathable. Specially designed to stop any riding up while on the stair climber. So, what do you think?
Will: I think you look like a family-size tube of Aquafresh.

Quote from Will

Carlton: Oh, yeah. I'm already starting to feel the burn.
Will: Tight as them pants are, you probably started a forest fire in your drawers.

Quote from Carlton

Stan: You okay?
Carlton: Me? Of course, I'm fine. I always scream like a girl when I'm working out.
Stan: [laughs] Stan Callahan. I'm the gym's personal trainer. Have you given any thoughts to private sessions?
Carlton: Well, I don't really need a personal trainer. As you can see, I've already got a good base.
Stan: Yeah, well, let's take a look. [uses calipers on Carlton's arm] Well, according to this, you're a can of Crisco.
Carlton: But spread over a good base, right?
Stan: Hey, I think you're just right for the gold package, huh?
Carlton: Gold? I think I like the sound of that.

Quote from Carlton

Stan: Okay, let's get you started with a little aerobic exercise just to get the heart rate up.
Carlton: Sounds like a plan, Stan.

Quote from Ashley

Joel: Now, remember, a clean uniform is a happy uniform. Ha, ha. Okay. Now, what's our motto?
Ashley: I represent Dippity Do Dog the best doggone dog-dipping restaurant in the world.

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