Lisa: So I say one thing that you don't wanna hear and that's it? You just shut me out without even letting me explain?
Will: "Will, I don't want to marry you" seems pretty self-explanatory.
Lisa: Well, you're wrong. Will, I love you. But I feel like the only reason you asked me to marry you is because you're feeling vulnerable right now.
Will: Well, getting shot kind of has that effect on a brother.
Lisa: I understand that, but what's gonna happen when you're back on your feet and feeling like yourself again? Baby, I don't wanna have to shoot you every six months just to hold on to you.

Philip: Now, now, Vy, I'm sure the boy has a very sound financial plan in mind.
Will: That's right, you tell her, Uncle Phil.
Philip: Right. After all, he is working full time at the college.
Will: It's part time, Uncle Phil, just part time.
Philip: Oh, that's okay. I mean, you have that great hourly wage.
Will: Well, not to mention my tips.
Philip: That's right, that's right- Well, now, just what exactly is 15 percent of a frozen burrito? Oh, never mind. That's okay. I mean, once you graduate and you start your career... Um, what is it that you're majoring in, now?
Will: See, I haven't exactly declared my major yet, Uncle Phil.
Philip: Oh.
Will: You're not giving good examples right now either. Oh. Aha. Ha, ha. I see what you're doing. Hey, I watch The Cosby Show too, Uncle Phil. Ha-ha-ha. This is that episode where Theo drops out of school, right?
Philip: Well, yeah, something like that.
Will: Yeah, well, a couple more Pudding Pops, you'll be there.

Will: Isn't anybody gonna congratulate me?
Vy: Yeah, yeah, come here. My foot wants to congratulate your butt. Boy, no way are you ready for marriage. How are you gonna support a wife?

Will: Thank you, baby. Oh, man, this week has been hell. Remind me to never get shot again.
Jazz: It's always hard the first time. I remember mine. I'd forgotten how much Jewel hates anchovies on her pizza. Well, the rest you can guess.

Therapist: Remember, just because you're going home, doesn't mean you can slack off. The harder you work, the faster you'll regain use of your leg.
Will: Well, hey, you think I'll ever be able to slam-dunk?
Therapist: Sure you will.
Will: Oh, cool, because I never could before.

Vy: [to Will, as he dances] Honey, honey, I don't think what you're doing is good for you. [to Carlton, as he dances] And I don't think what you're doing is good for anybody.
Vy & Will: Psht.

Vy: Hey, babe. Are you hungry, baby?
Will: [sighs] Not especially.
Vy: Come on, you've got to eat something.
Will: All right, just give me the same thing Uncle Phil has. Just make mine a single-sized serving.

Jazz: Check it out, Will. I'm the Black dude on ER.
Lisa: Jazz, that is not a toy.
Jazz: It doesn't have to be a toy to be fun. Check this out. Clear. [screams]

Lisa: Okay, baby, I packed your books and your Walkman. Mm. And this cute little backless gown that you just looked so good in.

Lisa: Oh, Will, you fell?
Will: Oh. Yeah, I fell, uh... in love with you, baby. Lisa, will you marry me?
Lisa: Marry you? Will, did you take another one of those yellow pills?
Will: I'm serious, Lisa. I mean, you've been right here with me all through this thing. The first face I saw every morning, the last face I saw every night. I just want that to go on forever.
Lisa: Will, I don't know what to say.
Will: Your face says it all, baby. Hey, listen, we should probably... Ah. We should probably keep this thing a secret, just spring it on people at the right time. Then it's gonna blow them away.
Lisa: It sure is.
Will: Oh. Oh, babe, I'm sorry I don't have a ring for you. I can give you this one around my collar.