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‘Will Gets Committed’ Quotes Page 1 of 2

The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air: Will Gets Committed

302. Will Gets Committed

Aired September 21, 1992

Philip encourages his family to volunteer to clean up their old neighborhood.

Quote from Will

Noah: Hey, so what time you coming back tomorrow?
Will: Oh, I can't make it tomorrow, man. I got school and everything, you know.
Noah: Oh, yeah, yeah. Well, I'll get with you next weekend, then.
Will: Oh, man. Well, I can't make it next weekend, you know I got a date on Saturday and then I got a ball game on Sunday. So, you know how it is, man.
Noah: Yeah, I know how it is. You're not coming back.
Will: Wait, whoa, whoa. Hold up, man, I'm coming back.
Noah: No, you're not, man. I bet you feel pretty good about yourself, don't you? I mean, you come down here, do the right thing then you go home patting yourself on the back 'cause you helped out the poor folk.
Will: Wait. Hold up, man. Yo, I'm from Philly. We had to save up to be poor. Why you sweating me like this man, what's up?
Noah: 'Cause, you're just like all the rest of them. You come around here with the X cap and them cool Doc Martens and you're all "dope" and "word to your mother." And you think that makes you committed? Let me tell you something, this ain't no game. And if you think that it is, then maybe you should go home 'cause you're not welcome here. Tell Dan Quayle I said, "What's up."
Will: Oh, oh, oh, oh! Now I'm not welcome here, right? Well, you got your story a little wrong, homey. This community appreciates me. I don't even know Dan Quayle.

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Quote from Carlton

[flashback:]
Young Carlton: Mom, Dad, I've been thinking it over and I've decided what I want to be when I grow up.
Young Will: What, tall?
Young Vivian: That's nice, honey, what?
Young Carlton: President of the United States.
Young Philip: Well, that would make me very proud, Carlton. Imagine, my son, the country's first Black president.
Young Carlton: I'm Black?

Quote from Will

Philip: Will, get your feet off the furniture.
Will: Oh, I'm sorry about that, Uncle Phil.
Philip: Why aren't you doing your homework?
Will: No, see, I was just-
Philip: How many times have I told you not to eat on the couch? And while we're on the subject...
[Will zaps Uncle Phil with the remote and he disappears]
Will: [to camera] It's kind of fly, right? Don't you wish you lived on TV? Shabba!

Quote from Will

Will: Boy, Uncle Phil and Aunt Viv sure are hyped up about going down to their old neighborhood.
Carlton: Brother, I can just hear them now: "Look, kids, this is where we lived when we first got married. And this is the little park where we walked little Hilary."
Will: "And, oh look, there's the pet store where we bought little Carlton."

Quote from Philip

Ashley: I think it's cute. They're going to be mushy and lovey-dovey all day.
Philip: Vivian, what the hell is the matter with you? You've been avoiding me ever since I got home yesterday. What did I do? Come on, tell me. Is it something that I did, or something that I didn't do or... Oh, my God. [takes artificial flowers out of a vase] Happy anniversary, sweetheart.
Vivian: It's not our anniversary, Philip.
Philip: Oh, God, good.

Quote from Carlton

Carlton: Listen, Simone, why don't you come by the school on Monday we're debating Roe v. Wade.
Simone: Oh, reproductive rights!
Carlton: No, row versus wade, the best way to cross a stream. [laughs]
Simone: You've got a great sense of humor.
Carlton: Yeah, I know.

Quote from Philip

Philip: It's Vivian. I don't know what's gotten into her. This morning she told me that I've become too...
Geoffrey: Predictable, sir?
Philip: Yes, that's exactly what she said. She said that I wear the same...
Geoffrey: Blue shirt every weekend, sir?
Philip: Yes, I mean, just because a man has...
Geoffrey: Froot Loops every morning.
Philip: Just because I watch...
Geoffrey: Legal Beagles every night.
Philip: Does that mean that I've become predictable?
Geoffrey: Absolutely not, sir. Why, you're a regular hotbed of spontaneity. You're welcome.
Philip: Thank you.

Quote from Hilary

Hilary: I had a fabulous time, Wesley. Why don't you come in? Oh, don't be silly, they won't be up for hours. [sees Philip] Night, Sister Mary Margaret. Daddy, have you lost weight?
Philip: Hilary.
Will: Whoa, Sister Mary Margaret drives a Porsche? Man, they must got it going on down at the convent, huh?
Philip: Hilary, what were you doing out all night?
Hilary: Oh, I wasn't out all night, I just got up early to go to mass.
Philip: We're not Catholic.
Hilary: Well, is my face red. Good night.

Quote from Philip

Philip: I guess you're really disappointed in me, huh, Vivian?
Vivian: Why?
Philip: 'Cause I sold out. Did everything I said I wouldn't do. Became a high-powered lawyer, bought that house in Bel-Air, and never looked back.
Vivian: Philip, honey, you shouldn't feel guilty about your success. Baby, nobody gave you anything. You have worked hard for everything you've got. You've been generous and you've contributed to a lot of causes.
Philip: It takes more than just writing a check. I've lost myself, I've lost my fire, my passion. You're right, Vivian, I have become dull and predictable.
Vivian: Philip.
Philip: I want to be the kind of man you fell in love with. I want to be open to risks, I want to take chances.

Quote from Ashley

Carlton: What's with Dad, anyway, waking us up at 6:00 a.m? Now I'll never know how that dream ends.
Ashley: She dumps you, Carlton.

Quote from Carlton

Will: Help!
Hector: Shut up, bad man. Put your hands up and put down the toaster. Put your hands up in the air, put down the toaster.
Will: Make up your mind, man. What do you want me to do first?
Philip: Will! What the hell is going on in here?
Carlton: Dad, don't do anything stupid, you haven't updated your will yet.

Quote from Will

Hector: Stay where you are, punk. I caught this little creep stealing.
Philip: Oh, I'll go call the police.
Carlton: I got a quarter.
Vivian: Now, hold on. Hector, there must be some mistake. This is...
Philip: Yeah, this is our nephew, Will.
Hector: You mean little Willie from Philly? But, of course, who else could it be with those muy grandes orejas? [all laugh]
Will: What does that mean?
Carlton: Big ears.

Quote from Will

Philip: Come on, now, kids, you remember Hector.
Ashley: I'll remember him now!
Philip: Sweetheart, before you were born, we used to live here. Right above Hector's grocery store.
Hilary: Wait, this is the old apartment? Oh, Hector, I love what you've done with the place.
Vivian: Well, we didn't have a lot, but we always had enough to eat thanks to Hector.
Philip: That's right. Even if you didn't have any money, you had all the food you needed long as he liked you.
Will: I guess y'all was in love then, huh, Uncle Phil?

Quote from Will

Hector: So, Perry Mason, how is the crusading business coming, man? Are you still fighting for little guys like me?
Philip: Well, I'm still fighting, but it's corporate mergers mostly.
Hector: Oh, so you're not working out of a little storefront anymore?
Philip: Well, no, my office has gotten a little bit bigger but it's just a few miles from here.
Will: Uh, you work in Beverly Hills, Uncle Phil.
Hector: Beverly Hills. Hey, Curly, that's terrific! Hey, maybe now you can pay me back for some of those Ring Dings?
Will: He ain't doing that well.

Quote from Will

Will: Hey, you know, Aunt Viv, Uncle Phil, I used to love coming out here to visit y'all. Hey, Ashley, check this out. This is where Aunt Viv used to measure how tall we was getting.
Hilary: Oh, look, here's me.
Ashley: Will, there's you.
Will: [points low to the ground] Look, there's Carlton.

Quote from Hilary

[flashback:]
Young Vivian: Hilary, time to set the table. Baby, why are you throwing your doll in the garbage?
Young Hilary: Well, I tried flushing her down the toilet, but the little creep floats. I want a new doll.
Young Vivian: Baby, it's all we can afford right now. With all the free legal aid your daddy gives, we're barely covering expenses. But there are more important things in life than fancy clothes and big houses.
Young Hilary: What have you been smoking?

Quote from Will

[flashback:]
Young Will: Yo, yo, yo, Uncle Phil, how you going to play a nephew?
Young Philip: On his behind, Will.
Young Will: That honey was about to invite me up for some milk and cookies.
Young Philip: That honey was old enough to be your mother.
Young Will: Word up, and she was divorced, too. [to camera] Parents just don't understand.

Quote from Carlton

[flashback:]
Young Carlton: Hey, big guy, got time to read me a bedtime story?
Young Philip: Sure, Carlton, what's it going to be? Cat in The Hat or Curious George?
Young Carlton: No, The Wall Street Journal, the part where AMC goes belly up.
Young Will: Are you sure we're all related?

Quote from Vivian

Vivian: Philip, I was afraid to tell you because I didn't think you could take it.
Philip: [laughing] You didn't think I could take it.
Vivian: No. But now I know you can. Philip, I was at the doctor's yesterday.
Philip: [still laughing] The doctor's!
Vivian: Philip, I'm pregnant!
[Philip stops laughing and passes out]

Quote from Geoffrey

Geoffrey: [sings] Good morning, Good morning, We danced the whole night through, Good morning, Good morning, To you.
Will: Must be what it sounds like to wake up in Little Richard's crib.

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