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‘Def Poet's Society’ Quotes Page 1 of 2

The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air: Def Poet's Society

107. Def Poet's Society

Aired October 22, 1990

Will joins an after-school poetry club to meet girls.

Quote from Jazz

Jazz: Man, I'm starving. When do we eat here?
Philip: We eat here later. You eat here never.
Jazz: Looks like you eat here often.
[Uncle Phil throws Jazz out of the house]

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Quote from Geoffrey

Will: Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Raphael de la Ghetto.
[Geoffrey walks down the stairs wearing a dashiki, a giant afro and a pair of glasses with the sun-lenses popped out]
Geoffrey: "Listen To the street beat Hear the sound pound Plug your ears Mask your fears Something weird's going down So listen to the street beat Listen to the box shock Listen, or I'll kill you" [applause]
Ned: That was heavy, man. Let's have another one. Encore. [all] Encore.
Geoffrey: "Cannon to the right of them Cannon to the left of them Cannon in front of them Volleyed and thundered"
Toni: Hilary, isn't that your butler?
Hilary: Yeah. Wow, it's a good look for him.
Geoffrey: "Came through the jaws of Death" [chatter] Silence, you ungrateful children. When you're ready to be quiet and listen, I shall return.

Quote from Will

Carlton: I hear someone in this room likes poetry. Try this one on for size. "Roses are red Violets are blue Pansies are poets Will, tell me it isn't true"
Will: That's funny. I got a poem for you, Carl. Try this one on for size. "Roses are red Violets are blue Jazz and I are Black, But Carlton, what are you?"

Quote from Geoffrey

Geoffrey: Master William, I applaud your new interest. Poetry is one of my great loves. I won first prize at the old Devonshire poetry recital of 1963. Master William, you should have been there. The crowd rose to its feet shouting, "Encore! Encore!"
Will: That's interesting.
Geoffrey: "Cannon to the right of them Cannon to the left of them Cannon in front of them Volleyed and thundered"
Jazz: You need a last line for that?

Quote from Vivian

Vivian: Hi, Will. Where's your uncle?
Will: He's throwing Jazz out the house again.
Vivian: Okay. Here are those poetry books you wanted. I used them in the Freshman Lit class I taught last year. If you have any questions about poetry, just ask me.
Will: Yeah, I have a question. I understand why guys get into poetry. To get girls. But why do girls like poetry?
Vivian: Because girls think with their brains.

Quote from Will

Will: [singing] Michael Jordan, Al Capone, Woody Woodpecker, Fred Flintstone. [talks] Hey, come on. Vogue with me, baby.
Ashley: Look, Geoffrey. We're voguing.
Geoffrey: And what is the precise nature of this nervous disorder?
Will: It's for people that want to look cool but ain't really got no rhythm. You should be pretty good at it. Come on, strike the pose.
Geoffrey: Unhand me, you ruffian.

Quote from Hilary

Will: But why did you two come?
Toni: Are you kidding? We heard the buzz about this event on Melrose. I cannot believe your dinky, little school got Raphael de la Ghetto to come.
Hilary: Why didn't you tell me it was poetry night? You know what a great lover of literature I am.
Will: Hilary, I've never seen you read nothing.
Hilary: Oh, that's right. And I suppose I just get my horoscope out of the air.

Quote from Jazz

Christina: Who are you?
Jazz: I am Raphael de la Ghetto.
Christina: Where's your afro? And where's your dashiki?
Jazz: I worked all that out in therapy.
Christina: I don't know who to believe anymore. How do I know you're the real Raphael de la Ghetto?
Jazz: Listen. "My love for you is like a river Like a summer breeze That makes my soul shiver One look from you Is more precious than gold Let's go get some barbecue And get busy"
Christina: Oh, Raphael. Tell me more.
Jazz: [to Will] Works every time.

Quote from Jazz

Will: Jazz, man, I'm glad you're here.
Jazz: What's up, man? You sounded kind of clutch on the phone.
Will: Man, I'm in big trouble. I promised Christina I'd have a famous poet at school tonight.
Jazz: I'm connected, but I don't know any famous poets.
Will: Jazz, I need somebody to pretend to be a famous poet.
Philip: [o.s.] I'll be home about 6:00, Geoffrey.
Jazz: Is that your uncle? Man, I'm tired of those grass burns. [runs out]

Quote from Will

Philip: Will, please. Don't you have anything better to do than to annoy Geoffrey?
Will: Well, yeah, but Carlton ain't home yet.
Philip: That's right. Do you have any idea what he does after school?
Will: Window-shop at Randy's Short and Small?
Philip: Carlton belongs to three different after-school clubs.
Will: I belong to the home shopping club.

Quote from Hilary

Vivian: How was your day?
Philip: Fine, until I ran into the man of leisure. Will doesn't seem to think he needs any after-school activities.
Hilary: [looking at self in mirror] Well, if you sit around the house all afternoon and never develop any outside interests you'll become a very, very shallow person. And you won't get into any of the good nightclubs.
Will: I'll never meet Lisa Bonet.
Hilary: That's right.

Quote from Will

Christina: Will, why don't you recite your poem?
Will: All right. Ladies, my poem is called, uh... Tick Tock CIock by Raphael de la Ghetto. "Tick tock clock The clock is ticking for you 'Cause the love you said you'd give Came up way past due So dance to the clock rock Stay on the floor 'Cause when the ticks turn to tocks l'll be knocking at your door" [applause]
Christina: That was incredible.
Ned: And very typical of de la Ghetto's work.

Quote from Jazz

Will: Yo, what up, J?
Jazz: What's up, man, I got this new Ice Cube tape. It's dope!
Will: Man, I ain't got enough time for that. I got to finish writing this poem.
Jazz: Poem? Then what you going to do, bake some cookies? Hem a dress?
Will: Shut up. I'm doing it to get this girl. Alright, look, listen to what I got so far. I just need one last line. "My love for you is like a river Like a summer breeze That makes my soul shiver One look from you Is more precious than gold"
Jazz: Let's go get some barbecue and get busy.
Will: What kind of line is that?
Jazz: It always works for me.

Quote from Ashley

Geoffrey: Miss Christina Johnson.
Will: Oh, hey, Christina. This is my Aunt Viv and this is my cousin Ashley.
Christina: Nice to meet you.
Vivian: You, too. You'll have to excuse us.
Ashley: Hey, Will, I've got a poem. "Will and Christina sitting in a tree..."
Will: Hey, hey, hey. Beat it.

Quote from Philip

Vivian: We're really looking forward to poetry night tonight.
Will: Wait, how did you hear about it?
Vivian: Your teacher Mr. Fellows called. He's calling all the parents of Bel-Air Academy.
Will: No, Aunt Viv. You guys can't go.
Vivian: But I love poetry.
Philip: Wait a minute, now, Vivian. Let's be a little sensitive here. Will only joined the poetry club because he had a crush on Christina. If we show up, we'll cramp his style.
Vivian: Okay. You're right. [kisses Will] Will, good luck tonight. [exits]
Will: Thanks for understanding, Uncle Phil.
Philip: Are you kidding? I just didn't want to get stuck at some boring poetry night.

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