Everybody Hates Chris Quotes
- Episodes
- Season 1
- Season 2
- Season 3
- Season 4
- 401 Everybody Hates Tattaglia
- 402 Everybody Hates Cake
- 403 Everybody Hates Homecoming
- 404 Everybody Hates the English Teacher
- 405 Everybody Hates My Man
- 406 Everybody Hates Doc
- 407 Everybody Hates Snitches
- 408 Everybody Hates Big Bird
- 409 Everybody Hates James
- 410 Everybody Hates New Year's Eve
- 411 Everybody Hates Mr. Levine
- 412 Everybody Hates Varsity Jackets
- 413 Everybody Hates Fake IDs
- 414 Everybody Hates PSATs
- 415 Everybody Hates Boxing
- 416 Everybody Hates Lasagna
- 417 Everybody Hates Spring Break
- 418 Everybody Hates the Car
- 419 Everybody Hates Back Talk
- 420 Everybody Hates Tasha
- 421 Everybody Hates Bomb Threats
- 422 Everybody Hates the G.E.D.
Everybody Hates Chris

Everybody Hates Chris is a fictional account of Chris Rock's teenage years in Brooklyn in the 1980s. The show follows Chris, his parents Julius and Rochelle, and siblings Drew and Tonya, as they move to Bedford-Stuyvesant (Bed-Stuy) where Chris starts at a majority-White school.
Starring:
Tyler James Williams, Terry Crews, Tichina Arnold, Tequan Richmond, Imani Hakim, Vincent Martella, Chris Rock.
Recurring Actors:
Travis T. Flory, Jacqueline Mazarella, Kevontay Jackson, Ernest Thomas, Jeris Poindexter, Michel Estime, Antonio Fargas, Jackee Harry, Todd Bridges, J.B. Smoove, Earthquake, Tony Rock.
Original Run: 2005-2009.
Quote of the Day
Quote from Drew in Everybody Hates the Laundromat
Drew: I told you not to put the coloreds in with the whites.
Chris: Mama's gonna kill me.
Drew: Hold on, think I could fix this. Excuse me, Miss.
Beautiful Woman: Yes?
Drew: My brother put the coloreds in with the whites and now everything's pink. Could you help us get the clothes back white again or my mother's gonna kill him?
Beautiful Woman: Aw, I'll be happy to.
Drew: Thank you.
Chris: How'd you do that?
Drew: I don't know.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] When Drew turned 18, that woman looked him up. Not to be her boyfriend, she just loved doing his laundry.
Popular Quotes
Quote from Rochelle in Everybody Hates Sausage
Adult Chris: [v.o.] My father always worked two jobs, which made my mother so comfortable, she'd quit her job over anything.
[flashback to Rochelle as a waitress:]
Woman: Check, please?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] And I mean anything.
Rochelle: Now, do I look like I have your check? All that hollering at people. I don't need this. My husband has two jobs. I don't need to be here right now.
[flashback to Rochelle as a receptionist:]
Man: Hold my calls.
Rochelle: Who are you hollering at? "Hold my calls." Hold your own damn call! I do not need this! My man has two jobs!
Quote from Julius in Everybody Hates the Pilot
Julius: I know you're not gonna throw that away. Eat that. That's 30 cents worth of oatmeal.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] My father always knew what everything costs.
[montage:]
Julius: [retrieving a chicken wing from the trash] That's $1.09 in the trash.
Julius: [next to a tray of burnt biscuits] That's $2 on fire.
Julius: That's 49 cents of spilled milk dripping all over my table. Somebody's gonna drink this milk.
Quote from Drew in Everybody Hates the English Teacher
Drew: 21.
Mr. Omar: You hit on 17?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] What Mr. Omar didn't know was that when it came to numbers, Drew was like my father.
[montage:]
Drew: Wow, that's 562,002 granules of sugar.
Drew: Wow, that's 357,000 raindrops.
Drew: Wow, that's one cupcake.
Top Episodes
Top Rated Episodes
- 203. Everybody Hates Elections
- 419. Everybody Hates Back Talk
- 101. Everybody Hates the Pilot
- 202. Everybody Hates the Class President
- 112. Everybody Hates a Part Time Job
- 414. Everybody Hates PSATs
- 211. Everybody Hates Eggs
- 222. Everybody Hates the Last Day
- 404. Everybody Hates the English Teacher
- 322. Everybody Hates Graduation