Kill Moves Quotes Page 1 of 4    

Quote from Everybody Hates the Last Day

Kill Moves: Revenge? Success is the best revenge.

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Quote from Everybody Hates Gretzky

Kill Moves: Chris and Drew are missing? Let me see what I can do. [picks up a cardboard box] One Adam-12, One Adam-12, be on the lookout for Chris and Drew. Be on the lookout for Chris and Drew. Shouldn't be much longer.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Yeah, until they come and take you away.

Quote from Everybody Hates Earth Day

Ms. Morello: I know in my heart, that money is somehow going to help us all.
[elsewhere:]
Doc: So we have 13 Styrofoam ice chests, four cans of aerosol spray paint, one pack of cigarettes, a gallon of whisky and one container of "I Can't Believe It's Not Margarine." Would that be paper or plastic?
Kill Moves: Plastic.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Happy Earth Day.

Quote from Everybody Hates Kwanzaa

Kathleen Devereaux: Well, thank you for bringing my boy home. He gets lost easily.
Chris: Has he always been like this?
Kathleen Devereaux: You mean "crazy"?
Kill Moves: [sinister laugh]
Chris: Yeah.
Kathleen Devereaux: Oh, Edgar's always been savant-like. As a little child, he had a talent for charts, graphs, numbers and martial arts.
Chris: Really?
Kathleen Devereaux: Edgar, what is the square root of pi?
Kill Moves: 1.77245385.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] I knew that.

Quote from Everybody Hates Kwanzaa

Chris: Hey, Kill Moves. You waiting for soup?
Kill Moves: This a soup line? I was waiting to sit on Santa's lap.
Chris: Well, what do you want Santa to give you?
Kill Moves: 300 issues of Jet magazine, a solid gold football helmet and an Ionic Breeze air purifier.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] That last thing hadn't even been invented yet.
Chris: Anything else?
Kill Moves: A Christmas present for my mother.
Chris: Really? I can help you with that.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] This was the perfect opportunity to get rid of my school assignment, and it was the daily double; I got to help a homeless person and a crazy person at the same time.

Quote from Everybody Hates Kwanzaa

Adult Chris: [v.o.] While my family was preparing for Kwanzaa, I was preparing to go shopping with Kill Moves. I didn't know much about him except that on Sunday mornings he directed traffic in his underwear.
Chris: Hey, Kill Moves.
Kill Moves: Merry... [holding a traffic cone] Oh, I thought you was the mailman. I was gonna give him this Christmas tip. Come on in.
Chris: You got cable?
Kill Moves: Can't miss Inside The NFL. I love Nick Buoniconti. So we looking for a gift for your mother?
Chris: No, it's actually for your mother.
Kill Moves: Don't talk about my mama!
Chris: I didn't mean like that.
Kill Moves: That's okay. I didn't hear you anyway.

Quote from Everybody Hates Kwanzaa

Kill Moves: Why am I doing this?
Greg: Well, if you're gonna go see your mother, you gotta get cleaned up.
Kill Moves: All right. You're the elf.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Cleaning up Kill Moves was tougher than cleaning up New Orleans after Katrina.
Risky: Here! What size you wear?
Kill Moves: 650 long.
Risky: All right. Uh... Oh, hey. Huh? Huh? What do you think?
Kill Moves: You have something in a chartreuse?

Quote from Everybody Hates Kwanzaa

Kathleen Devereaux: Until a few years ago, he was functioning semi-normally as an air traffic controller.
Chris: What happened? [discordant notes]
Kill Moves: Ronald Reagan. He fired us all. That sent me on a downward spiral of paranoia, schizophrenia...
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Reagan, too.
Kill Moves: I took to wandering the streets until I met Gazoo, the space man, he told me that the only true freedom could be found by living in a box.
Chris: Gazoo?
Kathleen Devereaux: From The Flintstones.

Quote from Everybody Hates Earth Day

Adult Chris: [v.o.] Since my dad wouldn't help me, I had no choice but to collect a few cans on my own. Unfortunately, you could turn in cans for money, and every bum in Bed-Stuy knew it. They may be bums, but they're not lazy bums.
Kill Moves: [in a trash can] Hey, Chris.
Chris: What are you doing in there?
Kill Moves: Collecting cans. Turn in enough, get a lot of cash, plus, it's good for the environment. What are you doing, soldier?
Chris: I'm trying to collect cans, too. It's for my Earth Day project.
Kill Moves: Want to collect cans around here? You got to be quick.
Chris: Yeah, I guess so.
[After Chris and Kill Moves both see a man throw a can away, Chris runs across the street to the other trash can]
Kill Moves: [in the trash can] Got to be quicker than that.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] And not mind sitting in garbage.

Quote from Everybody Hates Blackie

[Julius finds Kill Moves with his ear to the ground, literally:]
Julius: What do you hear, Kill Moves?
Kill Moves: Four riders... two on ponies.
Julius: No, about my place getting robbed.
Kill Moves: I ain't hear anything about that. But don't say I didn't warn you about the coming Indian attack. [war whoops]

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