Julius: Baby, what happened?
Tonya: Mama burned me with the hot comb again.
Julius: Oh, let Daddy see. Ooh! Rochelle, that looks bad.
Rochelle: Ah, she'll live. I don't think it'll make a scar.
Julius: Yeah, but that's 18 cents worth of butter she's holding on her forehead.

Julius: She's ten years old. Why I got to spend money getting her hair done?
Rochelle: She's tender-headed, she moves around too much, and she keeps getting burned. And I'm sick of this. So, either you pay to get it done, or you do it.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] If my father didn't want to do something, my mother got to decide how it would get done.
[flashback to the kitchen:]
Julius: Why you cooking biscuits and ribs for breakfast?
Rochelle: You gonna do it?
Julius: Go ahead.
[flashback to the bathroom:]
Julius: Why are you cleaning the tub with a broom?
Rochelle: Are you gonna do it?
Julius: Go ahead.

Adult Chris: [v.o.] Even though it was an accident, after breaking Drew's hand, I fell horrible.
Rochelle: I'm gone for ten minutes, and y'all are breaking bones. I knew that karate class wasn't a good idea.
Julius: Rochelle, it was an accident, just boys being boys.
Rochelle: Do you even know what they're teaching Chris down there? Where were you when this happened?
Julius: Asleep.
Rochelle: Mm.
Julius: What's that supposed to mean?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] "Mm" means she's gonna blame him for the rest of his life.
[flash-forward to 2028:]
Rochelle: Asleep again, huh? That's how Chris broke Drew's hand.
Julius: Rochelle, that was 45 years ago.
Rochelle: Mmm-hmm.
[present:]
Julius: Don't worry about it. I'll deal with it. I'll go down there tomorrow.
Rochelle: Mmm-hmm.

Chris: Hey, you need any help with anything? I could tie your shoe.
Drew: Nah, I got it. I can tie it with one hand.
Chris: Okay, um I could write out your homework.
Drew: No, I'm fine. I never wrote with my left hand before, but it turns out, I'm really good at it.
Drew: Want to see something else I could do? [does push-ups] I always thought I needed two hands to do this.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] I had to face facts. Drew could do more with one arm than I could do with five.
Drew: Want to sit on my back?

Tonya: Daddy, do you have a girlfriend?
Julius: What?!
Rochelle: Well?
Julius: No! Why would you ask me a question like that, baby?
Tonya: 'Cause men ain't no good.
Julius: Where did you hear that?
Tonya: At the beauty shop.

Vanessa: Now he's staying with Lisa.
Pam: Light-skinned Lisa?
Vanessa: Bow-legged Lisa.
Rochelle: Wait a minute. I thought Lisa was with Darius.
Vanessa: She was, until Darius caught her with his brother.
Rochelle: The one with no job?
Vanessa: Yeah, yeah, him, yeah, and he married, too. A wife, a girlfriend, and no job. You know these men, they just ain't no good.
Rochelle: They ain't no good.
Pam: Get out of here.
Vanessa: Oh, I'd throw the hot grits.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Tonya never listened to my mother until she heard something she wasn't supposed to.

Tonya: So is Richard still cheating?
Vanessa: Is the Pope still Catholic?
Pam: Vanessa!
Vanessa: Oh, I'm sorry, it's a reflex.

Vanessa: Tonya, I don't think that we should be talking about Richard.
Tonya: Why not?
Vanessa: Because that's grown folks' business.
Tonya: Oh, is that why my mom and dad got in an argument?
Pam: Uh... Uh... An argument?
Vanessa: About what?
Tonya: Well, I asked my daddy if he had a girlfriend, and he said, "Why?" And then my mama said, "Well, do you?" And then he asked me why I asked him that, and then...
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Although my mother told the girls not to gossip to Tonya, she didn't say anything about Tonya gossiping to them.

Chris: I tried to break your arm on purpose.
Drew: How come?
Chris: 'Cause I'm tired of you being better than me at everything.
Drew: What are you talking about? I bet you're better than me at some stuff.
Chris: Like what?
Drew: I don't know.
Chris: Uh-huh.
Drew: But you're still my big brother.
Chris: Yeah, but you're bigger than I am.
Drew: Yeah, but every time Mom and Dad leave the house, they always put you in charge. I wish I could be in charge.
Chris: That's just a lot of work.
Drew: So? Plus, you get to go to school all the way in Brooklyn Beach. I wish I could ride the bus to school every day.
Chris: You do?
Drew: Yeah! That's so cool. Everybody in my class is always asking me what it's like at your school. You're the coolest big brother out of all my friends.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] It never occurred to me that even though Drew was bigger and cooler, and better with girls, the coolest thing to him was that he had me.

Adult Chris: [v.o.] Even though I was the oldest, I never felt like Drew's big brother. People expect a big brother to be better at everything. Dominique Wilkins was the Human Highlight Show. And Gerald Wilkins watched a lot of film. Bill Clinton was the President of the United States. But Roger Clinton needed a presidential pardon. But with me and Drew, it seemed like no matter what we did, he always came out on top.
Kid #1: I'll take Drew.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] He was better at sports. He was better with girls.
Pair of Girls #1: Hi, Drew.
Pair of Girls #2: Hi, Drew.
Old Woman: Hi, Chris.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] She's kind of cute. He looked older.
Drew: Two for Scarface.
Ticket Seller: You can go. But your little brother's gonna have to see something else.
Chris: But I'm older than him.
Ticket Seller: You want to see a movie, or don't you?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] I actually went to see Mr. Mom that day. It was pretty good. But worst of all, he was a better big brother than me.
[As a bunch of boys play keep away with Tonya's doll:]
Tonya: I'm gonna get my big brother on you. Chris! Go get Drew!