TV Quotes

Rochelle: If I ever catch any of y'all spray painting on anybody's wall, I'm gonna put my foot so far up your behind, you'll have toes for teeth. Get inside.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] That's my mother Rochelle. She had a hundred recipes for whooping ass.
[montage:]
Rochelle: Boy, I will slap the caps off your knees.
Rochelle: I will knock you into last night.
Rochelle: I will slap your name out the phonebook and call Ma Bell and tell her I did it.

Julius: Everything okay at school?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] I didn't tell him about the fight. My dad went to school during the Civil Rights era. After hoses, tanks and dog bites on your ass, somehow Joey Caruso didn't compare.
Chris: Yeah, it was all right.
Julius: Good. I'll see you in the morning.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] My father wasn't the type to say "I love you". He was one of four fathers on the block. "I'll see you in the morning" meant he was coming home. Coming home was his way of saying "I love you".
Julius: Unplug that clock, boy. You can't tell time when you sleep. That's 2 cents an hour.

Rochelle: I went to the beauty parlor and found out I lost $10. And Vanessa, my so-called friend, would only curl half my hair. Did you see my money laying around here somewhere?
Adult Chris: [v.o.] Here's how that sounded to my father.
[fantasy:]
Rochelle: I went to the beauty parlor and discovered that I lost my $10. [garbled babbling] Wa-wa-wa-wa-wa-wa-wa.
[reality:]
Julius: You lost $10? That's $10 worth of dollars.

Chris: I was hoping you could give me an allowance.
Adult Chris: [v.o.] I know it sounded like an innocent enough question, but here's what he heard.
[fantasy:]
Chris: Since you work like a slave all day and don't have any time to enjoy your own money, can I have it?
[reality:]
Julius: I'm not giving you money for walking around doing nothing. An allowance? I'll allow you to sleep here at night. I'll allow you to eat them potatoes. I'll allow you to use my lights. I'll allow you to drink my Kool-Aid. I'll allow you to nibble on them green beans. I'll allow you to look at that TV. I'll allow you to run up my gas bill. I'll allow you to walk up my stairs. I'll allow you to ask me these ridiculous-ass questions. Why should I give you an allowance when I already paid for everything you do? Who you know that gets an allowance? Huh? I'm finished.
Chris: I was talking to Greg and he said that he gets five dollars a week.
Julius: Sounds like Greg's doing better than me. Ask him for an allowance. You want to buy a leather coat, you need to get a leather-coat job.