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‘The Throuple’ Quotes Page 1 of 4    

Schitt's Creek: The Throuple

302. The Throuple

Aired January 17, 2017

Things get awkward between David and Stevie in their relationships with Jake. Meanwhile, Johnny helps out at the cafe, and Moira and Alexis try to spend some time together.

Quote from Moira

Moira: I never meant for you to think that I didn't wanna spend any time with you. Well I hope it's not too late to make up for lost time.
Alexis: Okay. What is your favourite season?
Moira: [inhales sharply] Awards.

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Quote from Moira

David: Alexis seems to think you like me more.
Moira: Alexis, don't be ridiculous! This is exactly the kind of paranoia that makes me wary of spending time with you.
Alexis: I was sitting right here, and you chose to eat lunch alone.
Moira: That is simply not true! I didn't see you. At first. Alexis, I would be absolutely glee-ridden if you would have lunch with me. Today.
Alexis: No, no, no, no, no. I wasn't actually...
Moira: You'll meet me at the cafe for their one o'clock sitting.

Quote from Moira

Alexis: Well, you wouldn't need these if you were having lunch with David.
Moira: Oh, Alexis, please. I wasn't even sure you'd show up.
Alexis: [scoffs] Why wouldn't I show up?
Moira: You've never wanted to spend time alone with me. There, I said it.
Alexis: You never asked.
Moira: Bordeaux?! The trip I planned for the two of us?
Alexis: That was a wine tasting tour, and I was seven years old!
Moira: You could've used the spittoon. That's what the other children did.

Quote from David

Stevie: I just wanna make sure that we're still fine, you know, down the line. Because what if things get complicated?
David: What would make things complicated?
Stevie: Nothing! But the last thing we want is a situation where one person is breaking up with another person, and that person is hurt, because things have gotten complicated!
David: Okay, I'm starting to feel like I'm trapped in an Avril Lavigne lyric here. And while I not-so-secretly love Avril, and have paid very close attention to her battle with Lyme disease... Um, I don't know why we're...

Quote from Alexis

Alexis: Don't worry, David, I've been in this situation like, the most times, except I'm always the girl getting into the truck.

Quote from Moira

Moira: So, how are working at the animal hos- Uh, how is working at the animal hospital?
Alexis: Fine.
Moira: That's marvellous. And uh, your daily exercise routine...
Alexis: What are you looking at?
Moira: It's- Well, it's a napkin.
Alexis: Let me see this. You had to prepare questions?!
Moira: I wouldn't categorize them as questions exactly.
Alexis: "What's your favourite colour?"
Moira: Black.
Alexis: That's one of the questions! It's right after, "How is your job at the animal hospital?"
Moira: Is it a crime, Alexis, that I had so many queries for you that I wrote them down in anticipation of forgetting them?

Quote from Alexis

Alexis: Hey. Um, you don't need me to work through lunch today, do you?
Ted: Would that be to make up for the work you were supposed to be doing this morning?
Alexis: I took one tiny break to watch two episodes of "Scandal" with Mrs. McCreary, while she waited for her dog!

Quote from Johnny

Johnny: Well, good evening. David, Stevie.
Stevie: Mr. Rose.
Johnny: Hello again. I take it we'll be dining together as a group tonight? Or will you be taking turns?
David: Um, first of all, what are you doing here?! And second, we're gonna need a minute. So...

Quote from Moira

Johnny: Hey, hey, David, isn't that your friend?
Moira: Oh, I didn't recognize him clothed.
David: Yeah, I don't know what he's doing here.
Alexis: You sure, David, 'cause I've got a pretty good idea.
Moira: Alexis, don't be crass.

Quote from David

David: What are you doing here?
Jake: Well, I was just in the neighbourhood.
David: I just thought after last week, we decided to avoid the motel. Like, generally speaking.
Moira: David, what should we do?
Johnny: Should we be walking ahead, how far ahead should we be walking?
Alexis: I'm just gonna walk, 'cause I don't even care what's going on right now.
David: Keep walking, okay?! Walk, walk, walk! Um what's going on? [David sees Stevie leave the reception] Oh. Okay, um, so you weren't here for me today. Okay.
Jake: Well, it's just a casual hang, you know, we talked about it.
David: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's totally fine, I'm just I'm tasting metal, for some reason.

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