Patrick: So I'm sensing some apprehension.
David: No, I think it's, you know, it's- It's not scary or embarrassing for the person you're dating to sing at you with an acoustic guitar in front of people. I think that's cool.
Patrick: David, you're gonna be fine. It's just a way to get some people in the store, okay?
David: Yeah. Yes, for sure. I mean, if you are, confident, to put yourself and our relationship at risk like that, then I am 87% behind you.
Patrick: Good to know. So now the only question is, do I wear my fringed vest?
David: Okay.
Patrick: Or more importantly, do I wear anything under it?

Patrick: All right, um, I would like to dedicate this song to a very special someone in my life. David Rose.
David: Okay.
Patrick: There he is, right there. That's him. Can't miss him.
Moira: You'll let me know if I should pull the fire alarm?
David: Yes.
Patrick: [playing guitar and singing "The Best" by Tina Turner]

Roland: Don't say a word.
Moira: That's not fair! Roland, why should I be the only one encumbered with this emotional cargo? Oh, Ronnie, Ronnie, might you and I confabulate for a moment in the back room?
Ronnie: No, Moira, I'm not falling for that one.
Moira: No, I assure you. I assure you it's a salacious bit of Council-related news.

Moira: Who put a picture of a ghost on my desk?
Roland: [gasps] I can't believe you opened that!
Moira: It was on my desk.
Roland: That's the sonogram of our baby!

Alexis: Um, but some of them are from people who are trying to point out things like, you don't even have a website.
Stevie: We have a website.
Alexis: No. I looked it up, and it's just like a cartoon of a construction worker holding a sign that says "We'll be right back".
Stevie: So. It's under construction. And the phone booking system works just fine.
Alexis: Um, actually the phone booking system is confusing, and the woman's voice was aggressive and off-putting.
Stevie: I had strep at the time.

Ronnie: Roland, why do you need the safe?
Roland: I've just been to the baby doctor, and I have some top secret information about whether it's a boy or a girl. Joce and I wanna keep it a surprise.
Ronnie: Your wife's pregnant in her 40's. How many surprises do you need?

Patrick: Okay, I'm gonna say it, we've been open for 3 hours now, and not a single customer's walked through that door.
David: Well, I mean, I heard that there was a storm warning for today, so.
Patrick: Oh. How do you explain yesterday?
David: Maybe the storm warning was for yesterday.
Patrick: So then how do you explain today?
David: Okay, you know what, I don't have all the answers. Um, have we checked to see if the door is unlocked?

Alexis: Um, the comment cards, for example, It's become very clear to me that you don't read them.
Stevie: They're just a placebo effect for people who feel the need to complain.
Johnny: Uh, you have to take those with a grain of salt, honey. Those cards are written by embittered people with way too much time on their hands.
Alexis: A lot of these are from Mom.

Stevie: That sounds intense. Um, maybe we should take a minute and think about this.
Johnny: Well, I don't think there's any harm in exploring Step 1 of the plan.
Alexis: That's great, because Step 1 of the plan was this presentation, and we nailed it. So, as your new VP of Marketing and Communications, I'd say we're off to a great start.

Jocelyn: Don't worry, Moira, I'm not gonna ask you whether I'm having a boy or a girl.
Moira: Wonderful.
Jocelyn: Roland told me what happened today, I just feel terrible that you are in this sticky situation.
Moira: Don't worry, I've propelled it to the back of my brain.