Johnny: When might we expect your daughter to show up? Because we do have a very busy day ahead of us.
Hank: Well, Baby's still sleeping. But if you wanna go and wake her up, tell her what happened, by all means.
Moira: Where is bébé's chamber?
Hank: [floorboards creak] Oh, there she is now. She's either up, or takin' a leak.
Moira: Either way, great progress for bébé.

Johnny: You took your signs? I didn't know you took the signs. Why would you take your own signs?
Moira: Well, I couldn't very well take Jocelyn's. That would be stealing and I'm running a clean campaign.
Johnny: You call this a clean campaign?
Moira: Politics 101, John. When you have limited resources, your best course of action is to create a stir. It's exciting. It's fun. It's like that episode of Sunrise Bay when I stole my own bébé.

Moira: It's just flagrant irresponsibility! To allow an unscheduled conception to occur!
Jocelyn: Moira?
Moira: Oh, she has no idea of the toll a bébé can take on its mother, or its mother's mother.

Moira: [sniffles] Good... [voice breaks] Good evening, everyone, welcome to the marriage of Patrick Brewer and David... [voice breaks] David Rose. We are gathered here today to celebrate the love between two people, whose lives were ostensibly brought together by the fated flap of a butterfly wing. It is all but impossible to explain why things happen the way they do. Our lives are like little bébé crows, carried upon a curious wind. And all we can wish, for our families, for those we love, is that that wind will eventually places us on solid ground. And I believe it's done just that for my family here. In this little town. In the middle of nowhere.

Johnny: Okay, well maybe there's something we can do.
Moira: Does bébé enjoy the theater?
Baby: Hmm?
Moira: How about two complimentary, partially-obstructed view seats to Cabaret?
Wife: No! She likes the Kinky Shoes.
Baby: You got tickets to Kinky Shoes?
Moira: I believe it's Kinky Boots. And no.

Moira: Well, I'm off. [baby cries]
Johnny: All right, have fun, sweetheart.
Moira: You realize the bébé is crying?
Johnny: I do, yes.
Moira: Isn't it scheduled to be dormant by now?

Johnny: Well, maybe a professional massage might help ease Baby's pain.
Baby: I like massages.
Moira: So, now you're taking bébé to the spa?
Johnny: No, I wouldn't be taking her, Moira, but maybe Baby can take her, uh, grandmother.
Wife: I'm her mother!
Johnny: Yes, well that.
Moira: Yes, you are! And you are going to adore the rejuvenating facial peel.

Jocelyn: Moira since you have the strong personal connection to "Cabaret", do you think that you could help me?
Moira: No, this is your bébé, Jocelyn, and an artistic cradle robber, I am not.
Jocelyn: Okay, it's just that I have this actual baby at home, plus a whole lot of term papers to grade.
Moira: I wouldn't want to step on anyone's toes. But if you would indulge me a promenade along memory lane, I'd love to sit in on the auditions.
Jocelyn: Okay, if that's as much as you're willing to contribute. All righty.
Moira: It's settled, then. Consider me a silent monarch on the wall.

Jocelyn: I'm here! I got a sitter!
Moira: Oh, Jocelyn, I'm afraid that dirigible has ascended.
Jocelyn: But I'm here on time.
Moira: Yes, you are, but we started an hour early. Ronnie has a massage.
Jocelyn: You moved the rehearsal for Ronnie's massage?
Moira: Well, it was also conducive to Twyla's schedule. It's hard for her to juggle, what with the cafe.
Jocelyn: Oh, is it hard for her? To juggle? And none of you here thought to tell me about this little time change?
Moira: You said you couldn't make it because of the bébé.

Moira: Dobro jutro, my darlings! That, of course, is good morning in-
David: Bosnian.
Alexis: We know!
Moira: Well, I happened upon the most charming petite patisserie this morning, and I thought, my children deserve breakfast in bed!
Alexis: Okay, have we done something? I'm so confused.
David: What do you want?
Moira: Just to be near you. Chalk it up to the heightened emotionality of opening night just around the corner, and my bébé girl leaving me so soon!