Angela: [sticks a hand in the pool] Oh, it is warm.
Cathy: It's almost too warm.
Gabe: I'm feeling eighty-two, eighty-two and a half.
Ryan: Oh, so close. Eighty-one.
Gabe: [to Cathy] Well, we'll say its eight-two and it'll be our secret.

Ryan: I mean, it's clearly meant for watching erotic cinema.
Gabe: Yup. We could watch some right now if you want. I got a Korean film on my iPod if you want to just- If you have the cables.

Andy: Thank you all for coming in. Just wanted to check in. How is everyone's day?
Gabe: Honestly, it was a little weird.
Andy: Really? Hmm. That's interesting. Because Erin and Pete thought it wouldn't be weird at all. Why do you think it was weird, Gabe? Maybe because you and Erin used to be an item?
Gabe: I still wear Erin's button-downs around the condo sometimes. So it feels to me like we're still in a relationship-
Erin: Gabe!
Gabe: ...a lot of the time.
Erin: Ugh.

Gabe: [to Andy] Walk away, bitch.

Erin: [on the phone] 2:00 should probably be okay. I can either take your number or- [Gabe ends the call]
Gabe: I'm sorry. This can't wait.
Erin: He's just gonna call back.
Gabe: Erin, I am in love with you. I don't believe in much, okay? I don't believe in horoscopes. I don't believe in Christmas. Uh, uh, I sure as hell don't believe in God.
Erin: [quietly] What?
Gabe: Or maybe there's a God. I don't know. I mean, it's just not a guy with a long white beard. Or it could be. I mean, it's possible that that is exactly what- what God is. But for all of the disbelief [phone rings] I believe in us. I believe in love. You have made me believe that for all of the hokum [phone still ringing] out there... Uh, do we not have voicemail?
Erin: Dwight doesn't trust robots to give us our messages.
Gabe: Well... it's just... [ringing] It messes up my rhythm.

Gabe: [on the phone] So I can reprimand them but I can't suspend them? Oh, I can't do either. Uh huh. Fair enough.

Andy: Hey, Gabe I need to talk to you about something. It's really important.
Gabe: There's no way that you guys have any almond butter, right?
Andy: Yeah, I don't know. Look, one of my clients called. He was in the middle of a big printing job and the back of the printer started smoking and then the paper tray caught on fire.
Gabe: That's weird. I haven't heard of that happening. I would even settle for apricot preserves.
Andy: What are we gonna do about this?
Gabe: I don't know. Call HQ, see if they know anything. Yeah. That's what I'll do today. All right. Yeah.

Gabe: [to Andy] I talked to corporate. Turns out there have been 12 reports of faulty printers. Out of 400,000. [smiles] We've investigated. Every time it's been user error. They block the vents or something, I don't know. That's why we have the fine print. Thank you for bringing this to our attention. So I'd like to reward you for that. [pulls out a gift card] That's good for five bucks at Dunkin' Donuts. Any Dunkin' Donuts.

Gabe: I don't wanna be the heavy here, but honestly, guys, this makes us all look bad.
Jim: Sorry about that.
Pam: So embarrassing.
Gabe: Good. Okay. End of the dressing down. I just hate that part of the job, you know, the power dynamics.
Jim: Well, you were surprisingly restrained.
Pam: We will be well-rested tomorrow.
Gabe: Okay. That's great, actually, because I wanted to talk to you about something else.
Jim: Excellent. Go for it.
Gabe: I'm sure you got my email about the printer fires. The one with the branching decision tree? I actually designed that chart. Kinda hoping it catches on. [Jim and Pam start to fall asleep again] Anyway, the question is, what is the best way to disseminate important information in an efficient way?
Jim: Right? So, uh, let's uh...

Gabe: Hey, guys.
Andy: Hey!
Gabe: Sorry, didn't mean to interrupt.
Andy: Not at all.
Gabe: I'm gonna head back to Siberia there. Ciao. [he and Erin kiss]
[aside to camera:]
Gabe: I started dating Erin this summer. It has been, in a word, exquisite.