Jim: Hey, how's things?
Ryan: All right.
Jim: Yeah?
Ryan: Livin' in the moment.
Jim: Do you have any reason to believe that Kelly would be mad at me?
Ryan: Oh, I don't play the politics game anymore, Jim. Can I tell you something? I played it full-on in New York. I played it high stakes. For keeps. Made it to the top. But look what it costs.

Ryan: Just checking out where I'm gonna be pretty soon. When Pam gets back. Gonna be close quarters. Gonna be a lot of tension.
Kelly: For you. I'm with Darryl.
Ryan: This looks like where I'll probably do my push-ups every day.
Kelly: Is that supposed to impress me?

Ryan: Hey, Pam, I just wanna let you know, I'm totally on your side with the whole microwave situation.
Pam: Thank you.
Ryan: I was just back there to make some cup of soup, the thing is still a huge mess.
Pam: I know. Can you believe it?
Ryan: It's crazy. But I guess the thing is at some point, notes or no notes, someone's gonna have to just get in there and clean it up.
Pam: I guess that's why we have a temp, huh?
Ryan: [laughs] Oh, no, trust me. I would just make it worse.
Pam: How would wiping it with a paper towel make it worse?
Ryan: I would find a way.
Pam: You've seen things clean before though, right?
Ryan: Pam, I am hopeless to that stuff.

Pam: When did you add this to the list?
Michael Scott: Pam, everyone deserves a second second chance. Ryan, just out of curiosity, how much do you get paid here?
Ryan: Sixty thousand dollars a year.
Pam: You get paid by the year at the bowling alley?
Ryan: What do you make, secretary?

Ryan: Do you guys want to hear about Thailand?
Michael Scott: Oh, yeah.
Pam: Sure.
Ryan: It was indescribable.
Michael Scott: Sounds awesome.
Pam: Beat.

Ryan: You should come into town this weekend, man. Yeah, we'll hang out Scranton style.
Michael Scott: Hey, you said you were gonna be out of town this weekend.
Ryan: Please don't listen to my phone calls. Yeah, she's like um, she'd probably be a six in New York, but she's like a seven here in Scranton. And then uh, my boss is my old boss from Dunder Mifflin. It's a small space.

Phyllis: What's going on?
Pam: I need to fit into my wedding dress. However, I'm also pregnant. [eats donut]
Ryan: You know, it's a myth that women have to gain more than nine pounds in a pregnancy. Look at these actresses. Some of them lose weight.

Ryan: Heard you guys are looking for cash for the wedding?
Pam: Yeah, I mean, if it's all the same for you.
Ryan: Question for you. Would you guys rather have $100 now, or $5,000 a year from now?
Pam: $100 now for sure.
Ryan: Because you just give me $50 to cover the broker fee, I put in a hundred of my own money as the gift...
Pam: Yeah. No, no, I'll um... The hundred. I'll just take the hundred.
Ryan: Instead of $5,000 a year from now?
Pam: How sure is this?
[aside to camera:]
Pam: The guy has an algorithm to determine the winner of any given college basketball game. Don't tell Jim.

Michael Scott: God, what you people don't know about business I could fill a book with.
Ryan: Then do it.
Michael Scott: What?
Ryan: Write a book.

Ryan: Okay, the reason these movies are so popular, is the element of psychological torment.
Dwight K. Schrute: I like where you're going with this. Continue.
Ryan: Could we lure him into an old warehouse or something?
Dwight K. Schrute: I have an old barn!
Ryan: Yes!
Dwight K. Schrute: It's kinda smelly, but that might be a plus! And then what?
Ryan: We do what they did in Saw! ... I mean, we don't kill him, obviously. I have a mask...
Dwight K. Schrute: Okay, that's your idea? Exactly like in the movie!? That is the most idiotic thing I have ever heard in my life!
Ryan: Well suggest something else then! Don't just-
Dwight K. Schrute: He's supposed to cut his leg off? Think!
Ryan: Don't just criticize my idea!
Dwight K. Schrute: Think!
Ryan: You think of something then!