Nellie: Blow in my ear.
Todd: Alright.
Nellie: Like I'm on the beach. [Todd blows in Nellie's ear]
Dwight K. Schrute: [imitates seagull calls] Seagull. [continues]
Nellie: And a wave crashing. A wave crashing.
[Todd and Dwight imitate waves]
Nellie: Oh, that is lovely.

Nellie: Now who here believes in Tinkerbell?
Jim: Let's see it. Show of hands.
Kevin: I do. [applause] Come on everyone...
Jim: All right, guys, stop.
Meredith: I already spent the money.
Jim: How?
Kevin: Come on, Jim, you're killing her!
All: We believe! We believe!
Robert: Look at this wonderful recognition of Nellie's leadership. I believe!

Toby: I'm just curious though, what do you have against Pete and Erin?
Nellie: Well, Andy wrote me a really nice recommendation letter for the adoption agency, and I- I just sort of felt I owed him one.
Toby: Pete's a pretty cool guy, though, and Andy was a terrible lover to Erin. He basically ignored her and left on a boat.
Nellie: I didn't really think about it like that.
Toby: Yeah, well... Not everybody has what we have.
Nellie: "What we have"?
Toby: Mm-hmm.
[aside to camera:]
Nellie: I just remembered... I kissed that man. ... Oh, no. Oh, no.

Pam: It's, uh, a text from Andy. "New special proj. Need fam tree for evbody. Really dig up dirt A.S.A.P." And then in parentheses, he wrote out "as soon as possible."
Nellie: Mm. Ugh, looks like its pretend-y time again. Write back, "looking for dirt."
Pam: Oh, can I help? We could say someone is related to, uhm, Tonya Harding.
Nellie: Pam, I'm related to Tonya Harding.
Pam: Oh, gee. I'm...
Nellie: No! I'm just practicing my lying. [whispers] I love it.

Nellie: What should we say about Jim?
Pam: Um. Oh! I'll say he's related to Richard Nixon. It's an inside joke. He looks really Nixon-y when he wakes up.
Nellie: My ex behaved like Nixon. All of the lying. None of the sexual charisma. ... I just made a joke then.
Pam: I'm sorry. It's just, um, I actually do have this weird feeling that there's something Jim isn't telling me.
Nellie: Oh no! Oh! An affair! It is always an affair!
Pam: Jim? No.
Nellie: [sighs] How can you be sure?
Pam: Because he just loves me too much.
Nellie: You're a cocky little thing, aren't you, Pam?

Nellie: Listen, I'm really struggling with this form. But as you know the system, you think maybe you could..?
Erin: Absolutely. I know exactly what they want to hear. I would love to help.
Nellie: Oh, thank you so much!
Erin: [whispers] Just don't tell Andy, because..
Nellie: He hates me and thinks I'm a monster. Should go back to Loch Ness.

Erin: Nellie, you have to shut down the task force. I'm not sure if you need to start a new task force to do that, but please just shut down the task force.
Nellie: I suppose that will- That will be all right, yeah.
[aside to camera:]
Nellie: Most relationships eventually die on their own, but sometimes they just need a little pillow over the face. You're welcome, Andy. And you're welcome, my own ass.

Nellie: Okay, next up we have two creatures great and small: Kevin versus Angela.

Nellie: Todd, look at that. [points to Dwight's wound]
Todd: Oh, yikes. Incoming! [tries to touch the wound]
Dwight K. Schrute: Ah! Not so fast.
Nellie: Would you come in early tomorrow so we can talk about the store over breakfast? I feel you [points to both of them] have a lot to offer.
Todd: It would be an honor, ma'am.
Dwight K. Schrute: I'll go ahead and cancel my post-op check-up right now.

Nellie: [to Todd Packer] You look like Ed Harris if they stretched him a little bit.