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‘Customer Loyalty’ Quotes Page 1 of 4    

The Office: Customer Loyalty

912. Customer Loyalty

Aired January 24, 2013

Dwight fears the Dunder Mifflin employees aren't being loyal to their customers after Darryl announces he'll be moving to Athlead full-time. Meanwhile, Pam and Jim's relationship is tested as he works in Philadelphia, and Nellie puts Erin and Pete together on a task force.

Quote from Jim

Dwight K. Schrute: Gotta clear out this cabinet, people, a lot of these are dead accounts. "Scranton Mimeograph Corp?" I don't think we're doing business with them any time soon. That's odd. A letter from Robert Dunder. "A valuable artifact has come into my possession. I have hidden it until such time as a person of strong intellect may safely recover it. This golden chalice is of immeasurable historical and religious significance." The Holy Grail.
[later:]
Pam: [on phone]: Did you send Dwight on a quest for the Holy Grail?
Jim: I think I'm a little too busy these days to s- [whispering] Oh ,my God. I did send Dwight on a quest for the Holy Grail.
[later:]
Jim: The Dunder Code! I completely forgot about that prank. That had to be like six or seven years ago. Stayed late every night for a month. Had a lot more free time back then.

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Quote from Kevin

Dwight K. Schrute: Customer Loyalty. What is it? Can you hold it in your hand? Can you nudge it with your finger? Can you dump it on a woman? No. Why? Because it's an idea. But what does it mean?
Kevin: Oh, it's when you get a free sandwich after you've already eaten ten sandwiches.

Quote from Nellie

Nellie: Oh, no, no, no, no. Oh God. Andy has just started to be nice to me, I just sent his girlfriend into the arms of a younger man. And I CC'd him on every incriminating memo. "Pete and Erin, don't hold back. Our social media presence should be hot, hot, hot. Go at it vigorously." I did everything but unzip their pants for them. Oh, God, Nellie.

Quote from Kevin

Pete: Come on, guys, where is this even coming from?
Kevin: Your feelings for Erin? Probably your heart. And a little bit your penis.

Quote from Pam

Pam: Hey, Angela? Did you hear about the Irish-American Cultural Center mural?
Kevin: Ooh, I haven't heard it. So, what about the Irish-American Cultural Center mural? Potato?
Pam: Oh, no, Kevin, it's not a joke. Angela's husband put me up for a... Um, just never mind.
Angela: I have no information. But I'm sure as soon as they know, they'll call you.
[aside to camera:]
Pam: Senator Lipton helped me submit my design for a new mural on a building downtown. Now I'm just waiting to hear from the selection committee. But, you know, let's be realistic. There are a ton of great artists in Scranton with way more experience. I mean, who are they gonna go with, some nobody like me or a big name like Tracy Fleeb?

Quote from Nellie

Dwight K. Schrute: Loyalty.
Nellie: Loyalty is exactly right.
Dwight K. Schrute: Thank you.
Nellie: Yes. I mean, it is everything. Let's all ask ourselves, have we been faithful in our relationships?
Stanley: That's none of your damn business.
Nellie: Darryl is "dating" Dunder Mifflin.
Darryl: Darryl is dating Val. Still.
Nellie: But he's flirting with Jim's company on the side. And we all know what flirting can lead to.

Quote from Nellie

Toby: I'm just curious though, what do you have against Pete and Erin?
Nellie: Well, Andy wrote me a really nice recommendation letter for the adoption agency, and I- I just sort of felt I owed him one.
Toby: Pete's a pretty cool guy, though, and Andy was a terrible lover to Erin. He basically ignored her and left on a boat.
Nellie: I didn't really think about it like that.
Toby: Yeah, well... Not everybody has what we have.
Nellie: "What we have"?
Toby: Mm-hmm.
[aside to camera:]
Nellie: I just remembered... I kissed that man. ... Oh, no. Oh, no.

Quote from Nellie

Erin: Nellie, you have to shut down the task force. I'm not sure if you need to start a new task force to do that, but please just shut down the task force.
Nellie: I suppose that will- That will be all right, yeah.
[aside to camera:]
Nellie: Most relationships eventually die on their own, but sometimes they just need a little pillow over the face. You're welcome, Andy. And you're welcome, my own ass.

Quote from Jim

Kevin: I don't get it.
Dwight K. Schrute: Aha! A lightbulb.
Kevin: A lightbul-
Dwight K. Schrute: A lightbulb. Okay. Okay. [holding note by lamp] Invisible ink.
Kevin: Whoa.
Dwight K. Schrute: "Higher than numbers go." The ceiling above accounting!
Angela: Dwight! Down, Dwight! Dwight!

Quote from Dwight K. Schrute

Jim: [on the phone]: Man, I wish I was there to see his face when he gets to the end and finds the... fake grail? No grail?
Pam: You don't remember?
Jim: I don't.
[meanwhile:]
Dwight K. Schrute: An "X."
Oscar: Annex. It must open something in the annex.
Dwight K. Schrute: Oh.
Kevin: Whoa.
Dwight K. Schrute: "Sedes introiti." Seat of entrance.

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