Andy: I got one. Will I still hit that senior-year growth spurt my mother promised me? My mother lied!

Barry: Andy? You have better luck with that Judy Blume book?
Andy: You have no idea what women go through each month. I mean, it's crazy. It still won't help us get dates, but it's crazy.

Barry: This is insane. How could you just turn your back on me?
Naked Rob: I guess 'cause we're millionaires now and you're not.
Andy: Yeah, we just don't have that much in common anymore, you know.
Barry: But this literally just happened.

Jesse Wudders: Okay, we're gonna lose.
Adam: Not if we have a sexy incentive for us to win.
Andy: Aw, yeah, like in the movie. Whenever the Indians would win, they would remove a sliver of clothing from a cardboard cutout of the team's super hot yet evil owner.
Adam: Which is why I made a cardboard cutout of our nemesis, school principal and avid swimmer, Earl Ball. [all groan] Relax. We're only gonna take a piece off when we don't win.
Naked Rob: This team shall never lose again.
Matt: We can't let it happen, guys.
Andy: For sure! But also, where did you get that picture?

Andy: Or you could work for my Uncle Ronnie. Yeah, he puts a box in my trunk, I drive it across the Canadian border, and then wham, bam, all the Hardee's I can eat.
Naked Rob: Yeah, bro. I think you might be a drug mule.
Geoff: What if I don't want to be Queen Latifah or a criminal?
Barry: Done! You will start your own insanely lucrative business.
Matt: That's better!
Naked Rob: I use businesses all the time.
Andy: I think I'm in real trouble.

Barry: I've called this emergency meeting to tell you I will not be a painfully handsome frat god who is above the law. I'll merely be painfully handsome.
Matt: I'm sorry, Bar. Those idiots don't know what they're missing.
Barry: But what hurts even more is, while I'm flailing, you guys are out there crushing it.
Geoff: While that's incredibly petty and mean, the truth is, we're actually not.
Andy: I lied before about being the coxswain of the rowing team. I just like saying "coxswain."
Barry: Coxswain. Oh. That is fun.

Naked Rob: It is. Thanks to my older bro, I'm always the one who dealt it, regardless of who smelt it.
Andy: And my older sister decided to take my room. So now I sleep on the couch.
Geoff: Why not take her old room?
Andy: And have her take it back? [chuckling] No. I'm not jumping on that carousel.

All: [harmonizing] Come, come, come in
Barry: Yeah.
Erica: The hell's this?
Barry: This is the Barry-Tones, my new musical mouth quartet.
Naked Rob: I'm the bass.
Matt: I'm also the bass.
Andy: What's a bass?

Andy: Evening, my good man. Can you tell us where the party's at?
Naked Rob: We're ready to spring break!
Lon MacDowell: Oh. [chuckles] Well, it's 9:00 a. m., so you can enjoy our Tuesday brunch buffet.
Andy: Tuesday? Did we just sleep for 36 hours straight?
Naked Rob: Oh, no! Island time has robbed us of real‐world time.
Andy: Damn you, island time!

Barry: What do I do?
Andy: Maybe go talk to Erica. I mean, Lainey and Ren are both her close friends. Maybe she'd have a perspective on this that you don't.
Barry: Sometimes the tiniest men have the greatest ideas. Yes! I will ask my sister which lover I should take.
Andy: I'm not clinically tiny.