Barry: I just saved your life.
Erica: What?
Barry: According to the way of the Samurai, you're my servant until the debt is repaid.
Erica: That's not a thing.
Barry: Oh, it is. It's the Bushido code.
Erica: Well, that sounds like complete Bushido.

Erica: Look, it's Barry's baby helmet.
Barry: No! I thought we gave that back to the institute.
Erica: You were so cute with your little flat head. I used to rest my Kool-Aid on you. Oh my gosh, it's a picture of you all helmeted up. This is gonna look great in the year book.

Beverly: At least let me buy you girls dessert. Oh, there's a new "wudder-ice" place.
Geoff: Oh, man! Their "wudder ice" is amazing!
Other Erica: Okay. What are you people talking about?
Beverly: "Wudder ice."
Geoff: "Wudder ice."
Beverly: "Wudder ice."
Other Erica: What's "wudder"?
Erica: They're trying to say "water ice." It's a local dessert.
Other Erica: Ew. Your food and words are gross. I say we drive straight until we find some culture.

Erica: Dad! Wherever you are sitting or eating in this house, come to my room immediately. It's an emergency.
Murray: I was both sitting and eating, so this better be worth it.

Beverly: You stole my credit card to pay for a party?
Erica: No idea what you're talking about.
Beverly: Uh, hello? "Erica Goldberg's Valentine's Day Disco is Dead Party"! Your name is right there.
Erica: Oh, that's the other Erica Goldberg in school. I'm Erica F. Goldberg.
Beverly: No, that's Adam's stupid thing! And nobody cares about his dumb feud with the other Adam, anyway.

Barry: So now you know. This is where I go on the weekend.
Murray: What happened to your rap club?
Barry: It was just my cover.
Erica: Okay, you know, you're supposed to cover something embarrassing with something less embarrassing, right?

Erica: I sent her a letter from camp saying I was homesick. And the next night, she showed up in the top bunk. Look, this is a picture of us in a canoe together! Never again, Adam. Never again!

Erica: Lucky for you, I'm an expert liar. And I'll teach you because you're the coolest, smartest, most capable brother a girl could ever have.
Adam: Really?
Erica: No, but now you see how good I am.

Erica: I will sing for quarters on the subway. I will sleep on lumpy couches owned by creepy disc-jockeys. Sure, when times get tough, I may have to go cry in a bank vestibule, but then in the end I will be bigger than Tiffany and Debbie Gibson. But not Madonna, because I'm realistic.

Barry: Hey, it's me, Barry.
Erica: I told you to never come where I am.