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46Quotes from ‘A Wall Street Thanksgiving’

The Goldbergs: A Wall Street Thanksgiving

507. A Wall Street Thanksgiving

Aired November 15, 2017

As Marvin introduces Barry and friends to "Wall Street" with a get-rich-quick scheme, Erica turns to Beverly to clear off her credit card debt.

Quote from Pops

Virginia Kremp: Yoo-hoo! [glass clinks] Why don't we go around the table and everyone say one thing that you're thankful for.
Pops: Can someone send some turkey to the foyer?
Beverly: I'm thankful my daughter hasn't changed at all since going to college. She's still the same as she's always been.
Virginia Kremp: Aww! Shady and selfish.
Pops: Shellfish?! We're having shellfish?! What kind of Thanksgiving is this?

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Quote from Murray

Murray: Barry finally made a good decision to be a doctor. I'm not going to let you ruin it with one of your bonehead rackets.
Marvin: My "rackets" are not boneheaded.
Murray: Oh, yeah? How about formal pajamas? Baby college? Powdered yogurt? Dogs for dogs? Foot mittens? Spoons made out of meat? Airplanes that just drive?!
Marvin: Ground planes was a good idea.
Murray: That's called a bus!

Quote from Geoff

Erica: I should be the one freaking out, Geoff. I'm so screwed.
Geoff: Well, on the bright side, at least you didn't sink all your money into some investment scam like Barry.
Erica: Investment scam. What investment scam?
Geoff: Oh, no! Please don't join your uncle's illicit "boiler room".
Erica: They have a boiler room? Where?
Geoff: In your basement, next to the actual boiler.

Quote from Pops

Beverly: Well, this year, Turkey Day is all about taking it easy.
Erica: So, you're not going to cook for days without sleep and then break down crying because your ungrateful children won't help?
Beverly: That me is dead and gone. This year, I've invited 50 people over for pot luck.
Geoff: I heard Coach is bringing his famous protein-packed string beans.
Pops: I have to eat the coach's food? I'm very depressed now.

Quote from Pops

Adam: Wow! Oh, sweet glorious balls! It's the commercial for the new "E.T." game. I love you, Atari! You are a god!
Pops: Are girls still a thing for boys in high school?
Adam: Remember this moment, Pops. After today, our lives change forever.
Pops: Different things excite us.

Quote from Barry

Marvin: That's right. Cadillac. The "Cadillac of Cars".
Barry: Whoa.
Marvin: I'm a real stock broker now inspired by the loveable character that Michael Douglas plays in the movie "Wall Street". Check out my shoulder pads. Feel that power.
Barry: Wow.
Marvin: Do you like that?
Barry: So soft, but so commanding.
Marvin: I can set you up with my shoulder pad guy.
Barry: My shoulders have always been my problem area.

Quote from Geoff

Erica: Take a break, Geoff. I really have to talk to you.
Geoff: Oh, come on! I've only been here for two minutes! Thanks for ruining my life, Erica!
Erica: Okay, what's happening right now?
Geoff: We both know what's happening. You're dumping me. I knew it.
Erica: What? Why would you think that?
Geoff: It's Thanksgiving break. It's when people come home from college and break up with their high school sweetheart. It's a rite of passage. They call it the "turkey drop".

Quote from Barry

Marvin: Welcome to Wall Street, gentlemen. I'm sure that Barry has filled you in on the basics of our little business endeavor.
Andy: He told us we could triple our money in three days.
Marvin: Can't make any promises. But what I can do is promise that it will happen for sure. No question!
Barry: I like those odds.

Quote from Beverly

Beverly: Did you know there's a wonderful parade on Thanksgiving? Seriously, why have I been torturing myself every year at Thanksgiving when it is so much easier to let Virginia Kremp do everything?
Virginia Kremp: Bevy, do you have another pan? I think we're crowding the carrots.
Beverly: You got this, Ginzy.
Virginia Kremp: I really don't!

Quote from Andy

Barry: This is insane. How could you just turn your back on me?
Naked Rob: I guess 'cause we're millionaires now and you're not.
Andy: Yeah, we just don't have that much in common anymore, you know.
Barry: But this literally just happened.

Quote from Erica

John Calabasas: Hi. Are you headed into First National Bank?
Erica: Um, yeah?
John Calabasas: Because I can literally save you tens of seconds by handling all your important banking matters right here at this folding table.
Erica: 9th National Bank? Is that a thing?
John Calabasas: It sure is. We may be ninth, but we always put our customers first at this bank. Not actually a bank, not FDIC insured.
Erica: Doesn't matter. I need a credit card, and I need one fast.
John Calabasas: Normally, it takes about two weeks. But I can see you're not here for any weird reason.
Erica: Definitely not.
John Calabasas: So what's your name?
Erica: It's uh...
John Calabasas: See, people don't normally pause this much on the most basic question there is.
Erica: It's Beverly. Beverly Goldberg.
John Calabasas: Perfect, Beverly. One moment, please. [on the pay phone] Hola. Como estas? Es Juan Calabasas en la oficina de Jenkintown. Una pregunta, por favor. Es Beverly Goldberg una criminal? Bueno! Bueno, bueno. Muchas gracias. [to Erica] Beverly, I have great news. Your credit is excelente, so I just need to see a photo ID.
Erica: Yeah, um, it's...
John Calabasas: Hurry up, please.
Erica: Oh, there it is.
John Calabasas: Well, your thumb is over the first name, but I can see your last name is Goldberg, so let's get you that credit card.
Erica: Great! Great! And I would like to take a cash advance made out to Erica Goldberg.
John Calabasas: Whatever you need, Beverly.
Erica: Bueno.

Quote from Adam

Adam: Look at these awesome graphics, Lucky. Classic Atari. Let's do this. Dude, look at E.T. go slowly.
He's moving slowly. Oop, fell in a little pit there. No big deal. I'll get him out. Mm. Damn it! Balls! Seriously! Not again! How is E.T. supposed to get home if he keeps falling in these pits? I just died in the pit. E.T. is dead. Oh! None of this is from the movie.

Quote from Barry

Barry: Father, I've come for the money you owe me. I'll take it in thousand dollar bills. Go.
Murray: What's this about?
Barry: Marvin's stock went through the roof and I got jack.
Murray: Well, I did not see that coming. Well, even a broken clock is right twice a day.
Barry: This has nothing to do with telling time!

Quote from Murray

Murray: Look, I only took your check 'cause I was trying to protect you.
Barry: From what? Having an amazing life with a personal sandwich chef and a top hat made of diamonds?
Murray: Trust me, you don't want to live the crazy life of Marvin.
Barry: Oh, your boring old life is so great.
Murray: I got no complaints.
Barry: You should! All you do is take off your pants, watch TV, and raise a bunch of ungrateful, awful kids.
Murray: You're one of those ungrateful kids. You're insulting yourself, you moron!

Quote from Barry

Erica: So what's this awesome company that we're investing in?
Barry: They sell these electronic computer thingies.
Geoff: And what exactly are the "thingies"?
Marvin: They're called Ataris, and that's Japanese for "sure thing". [on the phone] Yeah, hello, buy all the Atari stock. Do it! Thank you, Jessica.
Barry: Atari? Why does that sound so familiar?

Quote from Barry

Adam: Legend says they're burying all the unsold copies in the desert.
Barry: Why didn't you tell us about that game, nerd?
Adam: It is literally all I've been talking about!
Erica: You know we don't listen when you speak.
Barry: She's right. This is all your fault. Get him!

Quote from Coach Mellor

Pops: Oh, no, the giant man is eating all the turkey. It never even got to me.
Coach Mellor: This is why I don't invite you anywhere!
Coach Nick: You know I need a constant stream of protein!

Quote from Pops

Geoff: Happy Thanks- [grunts]
Pops: Go around the back.
Geoff: Something's blocking the door.
Pops: It's me! Go around!

Quote from Adam

Adult Adam: [v.o.] And I think it's gonna be a long long time And so, we went back to our usual Thanksgiving. When I think back to my family sitting around that table, everyone together happy and healthy those were the best times of my life. Truth is, I couldn't see it then, but those are the richest memories I'm most thankful for.

Quote from Barry

Barry: Did you just bail out Uncle Marvin?
Murray: Yeah, he's family. It's what we do.
Barry: Well, I don't want to be the guy who you always have to bail out.
Murray: Who do you want to be?
Barry: You.


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