‘Girl Talk’
Season 5, Episode 6 - Aired November 1, 2017
After Murray turns to Adam to make a commercial for the furniture store, Marvin adds his artistic flair to the project. Meanwhile, Barry and his friends turn to Beverly for the help understanding girls.
Quote from Murray
Adult Adam: [v.o.] My dad had to make his own commercial, and there was only one geek who could save him.
Murray: I never thought I'd say this, but bring me Adam.
Quote from Murray
Adam: I've been waiting for this moment my entire life. I know your taste. It'll be quick and simple. Also, you'll be sitting.
Murray: Oh, I like this idea.
Marvin: Or, and I'm just talking out loud here, what if instead of simple, we made it incredibly complicated?
Adam: Ooh, I'm listening.
Murray: No, no. Do not encourage him.
Quote from Murray
Marvin: We have an opportunity here to make the biggest, most expensive furniture commercial ever, okay? I'm talking about explosions, car chases, furniture girls.
Murray: There's no such thing as furniture girls.
Adam: Uncle Marvin's right. We should probably go big.
Marvin: So big!
Adam: And loud!
Marvin: And sexy!
Murray: Go away!
Adam: Ooh! We can set it in space!
Marvin: Spaaaace.
Murray: No space!
Adam: And animals. We need animals. The deadlier the better.
Marvin: Yes, people respond to fear.
Murray: Not furniture buyers.
Adam: And we need epic stunts. How many sleeper sofas can you jump in a monster truck?
Marvin: Well, if we load it up with rocket fuel, an infinite amount!
Murray: When you're done, we'll do it my way. Knock yourselves out.
Quote from Barry
Barry: Gah! That's the third girl this week who shot me down. Don't these smoking hot scrubs know I dated Lainey for three years?
Andy: Don't ask me, dude. I haven't talked to a girl since my piano teacher told me to stop calling her.
Naked Rob: It's like the only people who see me naked now are you guys.
Matt: I used to have great luck with women, but it all dried up when I started hanging out with you dudes.
Barry: Coincidence, Matthew.
Quote from Barry
Barry: We officially have Erica's blessing. Let's do this. Naked Rob, you and I shall play the board game where you literally become a woman, "Girl Talk." Matthew, you take this Caboodle and make friendship bracelets for all.
Matt: One of you lucky bros is gonna get an anklet.
Barry: Andy, you read these Judy Blume books. Soak up all the teenage lady writing and see if God ever responds to Margaret.
Andy: I hope it's a yes.
Barry: Geoff Schwartz, you take Erica's diary and read her inner-most secret girl thoughts.
Geoff: She's never let me read it before! She finally trusts me!
Barry: Gentlemen, our world changes today. Let's get feminine.
Quote from Murray
Adam: Okay, our big commercial's all done.
Murray: Yep. There's no story, there's no effects, there's no artistic expression whatsoever. I've never been more proud of the kid in my life!
Quote from Murray
Pops: Okay, calm down. The man means well.
Murray: You realize that's the worst thing you can say about a person.
Pops: How is it bad if a man means well?
Murray: Because it means he doesn't do well. He's too busy being a moron.
Quote from Murray
Marvin: That's it! I refuse to work for someone who thinks so little of me!
Murray: Great. Then don't come in tomorrow.
Marvin: Are you firing me?
Murray: No, you just quit.
Marvin: Oh, no, no, no, no. I'm just refusing to work.
Pops: That is quitting.
Marvin: Which I didn't do!
Murray: Then fine. You're fired.
Marvin: No, no, you can't fire me. I already quit.
Murray: Too late. I fired you first.
Marvin: Okay, so rehire me so I can quit.
Murray: You're rehired. Go ahead and quit.
Marvin: I'm staying.
Murray: Then you're fired.
Marvin: You would fire your own brother? I quit!
Pops: He means well.
Quote from Naked Rob
Naked Rob: Dude, "Girl Talk" sucks. The only thing I've gotten from this game is a bunch of zit stickers.
Barry: And I admitted I had a crush on the hunky quarterback, and he's so not my type.
Naked Rob: You need a guy who makes you laugh, man.
Quote from Andy
Barry: Andy? You have better luck with that Judy Blume book?
Andy: You have no idea what women go through each month. I mean, it's crazy. It still won't help us get dates, but it's crazy.