Rachel: Everybody! Shush, shush. Central Perk is proud to present the music of Miss Phoebe Buffay.
Phoebe: Thanks. I wanna start with a song that's about that moment when you suddenly realize what life is really all about. Okay, here we go. [Phoebe strums her guitar, then the power goes out] Okay. Thank you very much.

Monica: Look at that face. I mean, even sleeping he Iooks smart. I bet he's a lawyer.
Phoebe: Yeah, but see the dents in his knuckles, that means he's artistic.
Monica: Okay. He's a Iawyer who teaches sculpting on the side. And he can dance.
Phoebe: And he's the kind of guy who, when you're talking, he's Iistening, you know, and not not saying, " I understand " but really wondering what you Iook Iike naked.
Monica: I wish all guys could be Iike him.
Phoebe: I know.

Monica: This is so typical. You know, we give and we give and we give. And then we just get nothing back. And then one day, you wake up, and it's, "See you around." Let's go, Phoebe.
Phoebe: You know what? We thought you were different. But I guess it was just the coma.

Phoebe: He's so sweet. And so complicated, you know? And for a shrink, he's not too shrinky.
Monica: So, you think you'll do it on his couch?
Phoebe: Oh, I don't know. That's a little weird. It's vinyl.

Rachel: So Pheebs, what do you want for your birthday?
Phoebe: Well, what I really want is for my mom to be alive and enjoy it with me.
Rachel: Okay, let me put it this way. Anything from Crabtree & Evelyn?
Phoebe: Ooh, bath salts would be nice!

Joey: Phoebe, what do you think a good stage name for me would be?
Phoebe: Flame Boy.

Chandler: What are you talking about?
Phoebe: Oh, don't feel bad. They used to like you a lot. But you got promoted, and now you're Mr. Boss Man. Mr. Big. Mr. Bing. Boss Man Bing.

Phoebe: I gotta go. [stands up] Ooh, head rush. One more, and then I have to go. [sits down and stands up again] Ooh. Cool.

Phoebe: [from the vent] Guys, he's beautiful.
Ross: Thanks, Pheebs!

Ross: Is Rachel here? I wanted to wish her a happy birthday before I left.
Monica: Oh, no. She's out having drinks with Carl.
Ross: Oh. Hey, who's Carl?
Monica: You know that guy she met at the coffeehouse.
Ross: No.
Phoebe: Oh, well, you see, there's this guy she met at-
Ross: The coffeehouse? Right.
Phoebe: So you do know who he is.