TV Quotes

Amy: Listen, not that you guys could stop me or anything because you know, you'd be dead. But I was thinking about changing her name. I'm just not really a big fan of Emily.
Ross: Emma.
Amy: Emma, Ross wants you.
Phoebe: Phoebe!
Amy: Why does she keep making that noise?

Rachel: Honey, I don't know how to tell you this but if something were to happen to Ross or myself you wouldn't get the baby.
Amy: Well, who would?
Ross: Well, we haven't officially asked them yet but we would want Monica and Chandler.
Chandler: I can't believe you'd want us to raise Emma.
Monica: Yeah. Oh, my God, I'm so moved.
Amy: I don't believe this. Hold on a second. You guys die and I don't get your baby?
Rachel: Amy, see, we're a lot closer to Monica and Chandler. We see them every day. And truthfully, honey, you don't seem connected to the baby.
Amy: Connected? I mean, to what? She's a lump.
Chandler: You know, guys, I've gotta say this means so much to me. I mean, that you would trust me with your child. I mean, we all know that Monica and I have been trying to have a baby of our own. You know, I've had my doubts about my skills as a father, but- That you two- That you two-
Amy: This guy? Seriously?

Ross: Charlie, this is Rachel's sister Amy. Amy, this is Charlie.
Charlie: Hi. Nice to meet you.
Amy: Hi, hi. And you are?
Ross: Ross? I grew up on your block? We had Thanksgiving together last year? I had a baby with your sister?
Amy: No. I- Did I buy a falafel from you yesterday?
Ross: Yes. Yes, you did.

Ross: Hey, Amy.
Rachel: Amy, you remember Ross?
Amy: Not really. But you are much cuter than that geeky guy she used to date.
Ross: That was me.
Amy: No, he was this creepy guy from high school who had this huge crush on her since, like, the ninth grade.
Ross: Still me.
Amy: No, I'm not talking about you. It was your fat friend's brother with that bad Afro.
Ross: Okay, Amy, I'm gonna save you some time, okay? All me!

Amy: Oh, my God. Is this Emmett?
Rachel: It's Emma.
Amy: It's a girl?

Amy: Hello? Yeah, hang on, one sec. Can I take this upstairs?
Ross: Sure. We don't live there, but...
Amy: Seriously? It's just these rooms? I thought you were a doctor.
Rachel: Yeah. No, Ross has a Ph.D.
Amy: Ew!

Amy: Stupid Thanksgiving.
Rachel: What? What? What happened?
Amy: My boyfriend canceled on me. I mean, I finally find a real relationship. Someone that I can spend this day with, and then his wife comes back into town. I swear, it's almost not even worth dating married guys.
Ross: Don't say that.

Monica: So welcome. Is this the first time you're seeing Emma?
Amy: Yeah, I think so. It's nice to meet you, Emma.
Phoebe: Phoebe.
Amy: That's a funny noise.

Amy: Where's the baby?
Rachel: We just put her down for a nap.
Amy: Listen, I was just thinking. You know what would be incredible? If you guys died!
Ross: Thank you, Amy.
Amy: No, no, then I would get the baby. I mean, you know, it would be just like a movie. At first I wouldn't know what to do with her. And then I would rise to the occasion. Then I'd get a makeover and get married.
Phoebe: That's a great movie!

Amy: You know, this is such a slap in the face. I mean, I'm your sister and you would give your baby to these strangers over me.
Rachel: Monica is Ross's sister.
Amy: No, Ross' sister was really fat.
Monica: That was me.
Amy: No, she was this really dorky girl in school who used to follow Rachel around like a puppy-
Rachel: Amy, you have got to stop doing that.