Previous Episode Next Episode 

‘The One with the Fake Monica’ Quotes Page 1 of 4    

Friends: The One with the Fake Monica

121. The One with the Fake Monica

Aired April 27, 1995

When Monica's credit card is stolen, she's more bothered about the exciting life that "Fake Monica" is living. After Monica joins her identity thief at a dance class, she quickly befriends the conwoman and gets a taste of a more carefree lifestyle. Meanwhile, Ross is saddened when he learns he must give up Marcel.

Quote from Chandler

Joey: Plus, you know, I think it should be Joe. You know, Joey makes me sound like I'm this big: which I'm not.
Chandler: Joe, Joe, Joe Stalin?
Joey: Stalin. Stalin. Do I know that name? It sounds familiar.
Chandler: Well, it does not ring a bell with me.
Joey: Joe Stalin. You know, that's pretty good.
Chandler: You might wanna try Joseph.
Joey: Joseph Stalin. I think you'd remember that.
Chandler: Oh yes. Bye Bye Birdie, starring Joseph Stalin. Joseph Stalin is the Fiddler on the Roof.

Rate

Quote from Monica

Monica: How'd someone get your card number?
Monica: I have no idea, but look how much they've spent.
Rachel: Monica, would you calm down. The credit card people said you only have to pay for the stuff that you bought.
Monica: Still, it's just such reckless spending.
Ross: I think when somebody steals your credit card, they've kind of already thrown caution to the wind.

Quote from Monica

Chandler: Wow, what a geek. They spent $69.95 on a Wonder Mop.
Monica: That's me.

Quote from Chandler

Monica: You've got to do something about the humping.
Ross: What? It's just a phase.
Chandler: Well, that's what we said about Joey.

Quote from Rachel

Rachel: Marcel, stop it. Marcel. Bad monkey!
Ross: What?
Rachel: Well, let's just say my Curious George doll is no longer curious.

Quote from Monica

Rachel: Ugh, Monica, you are not still going over that thing.
Monica: This woman's living my life.
Rachel: What?
Monica: She's living my life, and she's doing it better than me. Look at this. Look. She buys tickets to plays that I wanna see. She buys clothes at stores where I'm intimidated by the salespeople. She spent $300 on art supplies.
Rachel: You're not an artist.
Monica: Yeah, well, I might be if I had the supplies.

Quote from Monica

Monica: I mean, I could do all this stuff. Only I don't.
Rachel: Oh, Monica, come on. You do cool things.
Monica: Really? Let's compare, shall we?
Rachel: Oh, it's so late for "shall we."
Monica: Do I go horseback riding in the park? Do I take classes at the New School?
Rachel: No.
Monica: It's so unfair. She's got everything I want, and she doesn't have my mother.

Quote from Rachel

Monica: I'm going to tap class.
Rachel: So that you can dance with the woman that stole your card?
Monica: This woman's got my life. I should get to see who she is.
Rachel: Go to the Post Office, I'm sure her picture's up.

Quote from Phoebe

Rachel: Monica, okay? Honey, you're kind of losing it here. I mean this is really becoming a weird obsession thing.
Phoebe: This is madness. It's madness, I tell you. For the love of God, Monica, don't do it. Thank you.

Quote from Rachel

Monica: Do you see anybody you think could be me?
Instructor: People, last time there were empty yogurt containers lying around after class. Let's not have that happen again.
Rachel: She could be you.

Page 2 
 Previous Episode Next Episode 
  View another episode