Cole: Dude's a goner. I see it in his eyes.
Drew: He's Haitian. It's a poison-wood berry burn.
Lucy: How do you know?
Drew: Trust me, I know.
Lucy: Boy george! If you're right, you could seal the deal for keynote speaker.

Drew: Our presentation is at 7:00 a.m. Cole's supposed to do all the slides, Lucy, where the hell is he?
Lucy: Why are you asking me? Maybe he's napping. Maybe he's training to be a pastry chef. I don't know what his dreams are, Drew.
Drew: This is why I skipped junior high.
Maya: I'm sick of Cole. He's always running late. And I'm tired of him asking me to hook him up with Russell Crowe.
Trang: Yeah, and he's always making light of my family for coming to this country on a boat.
Drew: Trang, your dad owns, like, eight Hometown Buffets. Get over it.

Lucy: Oh, hey, guys. What's up? You out here scopin' the ladies? I hear Rebecca B. has sex with multiple partners. [high-pitched voice] What? [normal voice] That's how guys talk, right?
Drew: Not at all. Actually, we were just talking about how you told Cole that I said he couldn't get back into study group, but you never asked me that.
Lucy: I didn't?
Drew: Nope, and since the only thing I hate more than entitled little pukes who don't pull their own weight is when people put words in my mouth... Cole, you're back in study group.
Cole: Hells, yeah. The boys are back.
Drew: By punishing her, I punish myself. Such is life.

Lucy: Drew, I'm really sorry I lied about the study group. It's just this thing with Cole is messing with my head. I know he's a tool, but then how come I feel so horrible?
Drew: Because you're a needy, sad, crazy person who constantly makes bad decisions? Just my first thought.
I'm still working out the rest.

Lucy: But it's Cole.
Drew: And as sad as that may be for you, this hospital is so brutal that if you actually find someone that can help you get through it, you're lucky. Because here,everyone needs someone to watch their back. Right, Dr, Turk?
Turk: Absolutely.
Lucy: I don't like Cole.
Drew: Yes, you do.
Lucy: Damn it!
Drew: I feel for you.

Cole: You know, I haven't bagged a preggers yet, but I bet it's like having sex with a water bed.
Drew: The baby bump actually has the tension of an exercise ball. I was a doula in Madrid for two years.
J.D.: Oh, Drew, so cool. Been to Europe.

Lucy: You know, drew, we haven't really connected yet.
Drew: Nope.
Lucy: Is that because by sleeping with Cole, I've invalidated myself as a person?
Drew: Pretty much.
Lucy: I get that.

Drew: Mmm! Delicious. I'll see you later. I love you.
Denise: Um, what was that?
Drew: [chuckles] That just sort of slipped out.
Denise: I'm gonna just assume that was the frosting talking, 'cause, you know, that's something I don't ever want hear. So would you like to take that back?
Drew: Yes, please. [leaves, returns] Hello again. Yeah, you know what? I don't want to take it back, 'cause it's the truth. Since the second I met you, you've made everything in my life better. So, ha, yeah. I love ya. [Denise smiles, then slams the door]

Drew: [leaving a message] Denise, it's Drew. Look, if you're not into me anymore, that's fine, because there are a lot of women who get hot for married guys. Ha ha ha. Too soon, probably. Look, um, I'm a jerk and I'm a mess, and Please call me back.

Drew: I didn't ask to be put in charge.
Dr. Cox: I know, Number One, but that's who we are. We have been blessed and cursed with intelligence and wonderful hair, and people follow. You're just going to have to deal with that the rest of your life.
Drew: No, I'm done babysitting. I don't want to be a leader. I just want to be a good doctor.
Dr. Cox: Fair enough.