Beverly: Maybe we should have brunch. You boys look hungry.
Bill Lewis: Got it covered. Wing helmet.
Beverly: I think I'll pass.
Murray: More for us.
Beverly: So, this is your entire day, huh?
Bill Lewis: Sure.
Beverly: Sitting on your ass, eating helmet wings?
Bill Lewis: Sure.
Murray: That's what Bill wanted. It is his birthday and all.
Beverly: For God's sakes, it's his birthday? Did you at least get him a gift?
Bill Lewis: Of course he did. Wing helmet. Show her the wing helmet again, Mur. I don't think she got a close enough look. Wing helmet.

Adult Adam: [v.o.] And so my mom dragged Bill to Atlantic City to see just how lucky Lucky Al really was. Turns out, the old guy still had it.
Bill Lewis: Hot dog. You're wrong, Bev. The man's as lucky as ever. Nope. He's betting his watch. You're right. He's a degenerate.

Beverly: So, the way I see it, we have only one option Call your real bookie, bet a ton of money on a bunch of other crazy long shots, and win the 30 grand ourselves.
Bill Lewis: But what if we lose?
Beverly: Well, we'll just keep betting more and more until we're back on top.
Bill Lewis: Then we are the ones with the gambling problem!

Murray: Going to the Phillies game. See you later.
Beverly: Whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa! You want to bake in the stands in an open baseball stadium like a Wawa hot dog for hours on end?
Murray: You mean live my life? Yeah.
Bill Lewis: Bevy, let the man have a little fun before he lays down his burden [voice breaks] and crosses beyond the veil.
Murray: Bill, no one knows what you're saying. Go wait in the car.

Bill Lewis: What are we waiting for, Mur? Let's go get our Schmitty-Puss. I can taste Mike's butterscotch mustache right now.

Bill Lewis: Wow, your neck is thirsty. It's really sopping up all this sunscreen.
Murray: Yeah, spread it around good, like peanut butter.
Beverly: What the hell's going on?
Murray: What? Just doing what you wanted. Sunscreening up.
Beverly: Carvel is down the street. He doesn't need that much goop to go a couple of blocks.
Bill Lewis: All right, go ahead and pop that shirt off. Don't want those rays to get through.
Beverly: No! Don't pop anything off. What the hell is happening?
Beverly: Did you talk to the doctor? What did he say?
Bill Lewis: Well, the general gist is he's got a bad mole, so Mur's gotta go back and have more melon balled out.
Beverly: Wait. You took him to the doctor instead of me?
Bill Lewis: I'm his rock.

Vic: Don't worry, Bev. Murray's a good guy. He'll come around.
Bill Lewis: The best. But also the worst. He once told me I was too bald to look at. He didn't clarify and I was too afraid to ask and now too much time has passed.
Vic: That is a deeply upsetting story.
Bill Lewis: For sure, but I love the guy.

Beverly: Bill, did I hear you right? Are you really ready to be set up?
Murray: Where did you come from? I didn't even know you were in the house.
Bill Lewis: Well, I suppose it might be time to jump back on the old horse. As long as the horse is a lady and not too broken-down.
Beverly: Ohh, this is the best news! Oh, you're finally over your wife, and your heart is open to love.
Bill Lewis: Sure, it's that. And recently, my appendix broke and I couldn't find anyone to take me to the hospital for three days.
Murray: You know you can call.
Bill Lewis: I don't like to bother.
Beverly: Your remarkable tale of survival is gonna have a happy ending because Beverly Goldberg is on the case, and my Yenta-dex is ready to find you love.
Bill Lewis: Let's do it. It's time for Bill to flex his love muscle. Oh, I'm sorry. That was unnecessarily visual.

Bill Lewis: Hey, hey, hey! Beverly Goldberg! There's my walking ray of sunshine!
Beverly: I suppose I do brighten any room I'm in.
Bill Lewis: And my Mur-man. Looks like this big bowl of ice cream could use a cherry on top. Whoop! Mwah!
Murray: Oh! Get off! What's that smell?
Bill Lewis: Dial soap. It's the fragrance of bath time.
Beverly: And you're wearing a sweater.
Bill Lewis: It's something called Merino wool. It's not the best, but it's not the worst.
Beverly: So, y-you're happy?
Bill Lewis: Dolores is fun. She's interesting. She does stuff. We went on a walk!

Jane: Beverly Goldberg! How could you?
Beverly: You can't prove it, and I'll deny it to my grave! Also, what is this about?
Jane: Dolores broke up with Bill.
Bill Lewis: She said she thought we weren't a good fit. But she's the ham to my pocket filled with ham.
Jane: Which means you clearly did something to sabotage them.
Beverly: I mean, I went to dinner with the intention of doing something, but then I liked her.
Jane: You just couldn't handle that I found Bill love and not you.
Bill Lewis: I still remember the last place we kissed. Mouths. Why, Beverly? Why do you hate love?