Norm: So the camel says, "You get your own date." Evening, everybody.
All: Norm!
Diane: Norman.
Coach: What's shaking, Norm?
Norm: All four cheeks and a couple of chins, Coach.

Norm: Oh, my God! That's my boss. He saw me slip out early. He's come here to find me.
Diane: You got here the same time you always do.
Norm: I know. I always leave early. I refuse to be one of those little, cowardly clock-watchers, Diane. As soon as my supervisor turns his head, I always slip out the heating duct.
Diane: How would he know you're here?
Norm: The company's full of spies. They know everything about you.
Diane: Really?
Norm: Yeah, they know everything about you. They even keep track of your sex habits. Thank God I don't have any.

Norm: [enters] Morning, Sammy.
Sam: Norm. What brings you in this time of day?
Norm: Same thing that always does.
Sam: A little early for a beer, isn't it?
Norm: So float a cornflake in it.
Sam: Beer it is.

Norm: [enters] Evening, everybody.
All: Norm!
Sam: What do you say, Norm?
Norm: Well, I never met a beer I didn't drink. And down it goes, huh?

Norm: You got the cheering under control. I'll mosey up to the bar for a beer.
Cliff: You're gonna miss the game, Norm.
Norm: Then that's a perfect plan, huh?
Sam: Hey, Cliffie, how're we doing here?
Cliff: Fifty pins down, sinking like a stone, Sammy.
[Norm walks into the bowling alley bar:]
All: [o.s.] Norm!
Sam: How the hell do they know him here?
Cliff: He's got a life, you know.

Norm: [enters] Afternoon, everybody.
All: Norm!
Diane: Norman.
Sam: Hey, what's happening, Norm?
Norm: You know, it's a dog-eat-dog world, Sammy, and I'm wearing Milk-Bone underwear.

Norm: Boy, I envy Sammy his carefree lifestyle.
Carla: Yeah.
Norm: Night after night, he dates pretty girls, while I sit here and wrestle with the world's problems.
Carla: You do not.
Norm: What do you mean? Last night, I let out that moan at the thought of nuclear war.
Carla: It wasn't because of nuclear war. It was because we ran out of beer nuts.
Norm: It was a combination of the two.

Norm: [enters] Afternoon, everybody.
All: Norm!
Woody: How you feeling today, Mr. Peterson?
Norm: Poor.
Woody: Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
Norm: No, I meant, pour.

Norm: Cliffy, uh, thanks a lot, but l- l'm just not interested. You know, I guess I'm an example of the old adage, "l'd never join a club that would have someone like you as a member," you know?

Norm: [enters] Afternoon, everybody.
All: Norm!
Woody: How are you today, Mr. Peterson?
Norm: Never been better, Woody. You know, just once I'd like to be better.