Carla: That was Ann Marie's teacher. Said she's gonna have to hold her back.
Diane: Oh, that's too bad, Carla.
Coach: Oh, don't worry about it, Carla. It's just as bad to skip a grade.
Carla: You skipped a grade, Coach?
Coach: I skipped four. High school, I think they called it.

Sam: Okay, well, I got to skedaddle. I got a funeral waiting for me.
Coach: Don't we all?

Norm: So the camel says, "You get your own date." Evening, everybody.
All: Norm!
Diane: Norman.
Coach: What's shaking, Norm?
Norm: All four cheeks and a couple of chins, Coach.

Carla: So what's your problem, droopy drawers? You've been moping around here all night like a senior high-school girl who just broke up with her steady.
Cliff: Moping, Carla? I'm not moping. I'm just spending a little quiet time by myself. That's what a man is. Solitary, strong, independent. Ever hear of the lone wolf, Carla? The lone wolf, c'est moi. A man alone needing no one. I touch no one and no one touches me. I'm a rock. I'm an island.

Sam: Okay, okay, all right. I'd better tell you the truth.
Diane: That'd be nice.
Sam: Diane, I work for the government.
Diane: What are you talking about?
Sam: I am on a top secret mission for my country.
Diane: You are an idiot.
Sam: No, no, that's just my cover.

Diane: Perhaps, Carla, your desperate observations accurately reflect the relationships between men and women in the demimonde you inhabit, but for those of us who no longer scrape our knuckles on the ground when we walk, your views are incredibly primitive.
Carla: [stammers] Says you!

Norm: [enters] Evening, everybody.
All: Norm!
Diane: Norman.
Coach: Beer, Normie?
Norm: I don't know, Coach. I had one this week. Ah, what the heck. I'm young.

Coach: Damn tropical drinks.
Carla: Gee, Coach, it's too bad about the record.
Diane: Yeah, we were really pulling for you, Coach.
Coach: Yeah, and I came so close. Well, don't worry about it, everybody. I still got a personal record I'm very proud of.
Diane: What's that?
Coach: 11 consecutive days without starting a major fire.

Diane: What are you accusing me of?
Sam: I'm accusing you of accusing me of being a liar. I mean, all that crap about calling the newspaper. You just said that to get me crazy, huh? I mean, you and I both know you wouldn't make that call. Would you? Would you? [Diane walks past Sam] You did it! Oh, you called them! I can't believe it! Now you know there's no funeral. There's no Nathan Malone. God, what a stupid name.
Diane: Sam. Sam. I didn't call.
Sam: You didn't?
Diane: No.
Sam: Well, then, I look like an idiot.
Diane: No argument there.

Diane: Carla, I hope being held back isn't going to be too traumatic for Ann Marie.
Carla: Nah, she's been held back twice already. In her class picture, she looks like Snow White.