Vivian: Oh, cut it out, Philip. He misses his friend.
Will: Ice Tray's more like my big brother, though.
Vivian: Well, I've got a good idea. Why don't we fly him out for a weekend visit?
Will: You mean it, Aunt Viv? I'm down with that.
Ashley: Word up. This is gonna be cold stupid on the serious tip.
Philip: What did you say, young lady?
Ashley: Oh, I said that this is quite an exceptional idea, Daddy. Peachy-keen, even. Later, my man.

Ashley: Will, don't you have anything better to do with Christmas vacation than writing a silly letter?
Will: Well, what are you gonna do with your vacation? Are you gonna play with your friends?
Ashley: I wish I had someone to play with but every year my friends all go out of town and I'm stuck here all alone.
Will: Ashley, you can still do something to have fun while you're here.
Ashley: I'm going to. I've decided to learn a new word every day.
Will: Ashley, that's boring.
Ashley: Really? I think it's very autodidactic.

Ashley: [sings] A-dab-a-doo time We'll have a gay old time [shouts] Wilma! [talks] So what do you want to sing?
Hilary: How about Go Away Little Girl?

Carlton: Will, I hate to rain on your fashion parade but the Moms Mabley look is definitely passe.
Will: I was trying to take a shower, but there ain't no water pressure 'cause somebody broke the three-minute shower limit.
[Ashley sheepishly enters the room and tries to avoid eye contact with Will & Carlton]
Ashley: What?
Will: Don't give me that. Look at these fingernails. Look behind these ears. How long did you bathe today, young lady?
Ashley: Seven minutes. I'm sorry, but I had to wash. I have enough problems. I'm going through puberty for God's sake.

Will: Come on, Uncle Phil, I need to keep in touch with my tasties.
Philip: I beg your pardon?
Ashley: His tasties, Daddy. You know, his chubbies, his slimmies, his old ladies?
Philip: And, who are you? Queen Latifah?

Ashley: Hey, I didn't know Mom was a ventriloquist. Look at that funny-Iooking little dummy on her knee.
Will: Ashley, that's Carlton.

Ashley: Will, I need your help.
Will: Ashley, let me sum this up for you in two words: Unh-unh.
Ashley: You know, I didn't want to have to say this. But it's your fault I'm in this mess.
Will: My fault? Oh, this one here gonna be good.
Ashley: Before you showed up, I was leading a nice, sheltered existence. But you made me see there was a whole world beyond Bel-Air filled with people who take public transportation and don't have butlers. I like that world. It's like a drug, Will, and you got me hooked.
Will: Well, you better go cold turkey before you wind up a dead duck.

Little T: Oh, come on. You mean this is the most embarrassing thing that's ever happened to you?
Ashley: I guess not.
Little T: Well, what was?
Ashley: I can't tell you. It's too embarrassing.
Little T: Well, I'll tell you my most embarrassing moment. I was dressing for gym class during a fire drill and I had to run out of the building in my drawers.
Ashley: Okay, okay, I'll tell you mine. It was the Honor Day assembly, right? I was sitting with my legs crossed for the whole time. And when they called my name for the English award, I stood up and started across the stage, only my leg was asleep. And then, thwap! I fell flat on my face. You know, come to think of it, most of my embarrassing moments involve me hitting the floor.

Ashley: Hi, Mommy.
Vivian: Hi, sweetheart. How was school today?
Ashley: Oh, it was great. [Will & Carlton start gesturing to Ashley to stop talking] We had to write an essay in English. I think I aced it.
Vivian: Well, what did you write about?
Ashley: My neck?
Vivian: You wrote an entire essay on your neck. Well, that is quite impressive, sweetheart since your principal called and said that you have not been at school today yesterday, or the day before.

Ashley: Will, I thought about it all weekend and I've decided to sign up for cheerleader tryouts.
Carlton: Are you sure, Ashley? You'll have to wear an indecently short skirt make a spectacle of yourself in front of your whole school and ride on a bus with a bunch of sweaty teenage boys.
Ashley: Gosh, I hope I get it.