Leo: Hey, I got that waitress's phone number.
All: Leo?
Leo: Hey, it's great to see you guys.
Kelso: It's great to see you, Leo.
Leo: So, do I know you, man?

Kelso: Look, don't worry. All she does is sleep. It's like taking care of a bowling ball.
Leo: I don't like bowling, man. You throw the ball down there and it keeps coming back. It's spooky, man.

Leo: Hey, what's with the baby, man?
Kelso: I don't know. I can't get her to quit crying.
Leo: Here, let me try. Yeah. [crying stops] There.
Kelso: How did you do that?
Leo: Babies love me, man, 'cause I'm fuzzy. I'll go give her a bottle.

Leo: So if you have a whole record store, how come you've been kind of mopey lately, man?
Hyde: I'm not mopey. I'm fine.
Leo: Well, where's that loud girl you're always hanging with?
Hyde: Jackie? She's in Chicago.
Leo: Loud girl's in Chicago. Hey, that's why you're sad, man. You love loud girl.
Hyde: Maybe I do. You know what? The only reason I'm admitting that is because you have no short-term memory and you're gonna forget this conversation when it's over.
Leo: Hey, that's not true, man. Hey, guess what I found out?
Hyde: What, Leo?
Leo: Loud girl's in Chicago.

Leo: Hey, dudes, pull up a pillow.
Hyde: Leo, what the hell did you do with my record store?
Leo: Record store? You know, now that you mention it, this place would make an awesome record store.

Leo: Hey, guys, guess what? One of the Allman Brothers is here.

Red: Leo, pay these women.
Leo: I don't have any money, man. All I have is a ticket for the 1964 World's Fair. One more year, I can't wait!

Leo: All right guys, sit back and enjoy the show. [music plays]
Hyde: Uh, Leo, when does the show start?
Leo: This is the show, man.
Randy: Where's the stripper?
Leo: What do we need a stripper for? We got a giant cake!

[As Leo reads the newspaper at the record store, the nudie pictures fall out]
Randy: Whoa!
Hyde: Holy hell!
Leo: I know, man. Where's Marmaduke?

Donna: Please, Leo, you have to remember who you sold that record to. Think. Who have you seen today?
Leo: Well, I remember a guy with scraggly hair and a beard. And he was brushing his teeth.
Donna: That was you in a mirror.
Leo: And then there's this other guy with big lips and another guy with long hair. And another guy with a thumbtack in his head.
Randy: That would be the Aerosmith poster.
Hyde: You know, I have been trapped in this vortex before. There is a way we can jog his memory.
[circle:]
Leo: It was Fez, man!