Fez: Wait a minute, it's just a dogcatcher van.
Eric: Well, hello, that's exactly what the Feds want us to think.
Fez: But I just heard dogs barking inside.
Hyde: It's obviously a tape recording of trained dogs. The barking's too self-conscious.
Kelso: Plus, a dogcatcher van wouldn't just say "dog catcher" on the side of it, 'cause otherwise the dogs would see it and just run away.
Eric: On three. One, two, three!
[A group of dogs run out of the van when the guys open the back doors]
Fez: I don't understand.
Hyde: Look, I don't know if it's the fresh air talking, but I'm starting to think this whole thing's just our imagination.
Eric: You know what, you guys, maybe we just need to let this whole fantasy world of ours go. [swinging light saber] Whoa. Watch out, man, I almost just cut you right in half there.

Jackie: Oh, my God, there was a pack of wild dogs loose. I had to climb to the top of this giant thing to get away from them. [sighs]
Donna: That was me.
Fez: Dogs, huh?
Donna: What did you do?
Eric: Nothing. We... Kelso thought there was a death ray, so we called the White House, and the Feds came, but... [sighs] It was just a vacuum.
Donna: Okay, I'm cutting you guys off. Where's your stash?
Kelso: It's all gone, man.

Man: Well, the Bears have pretty much lost the game, so why don't you get lost?
Red: Look, I think you've made your point. Yes, he's wearing a Bears jersey, but he's my son.
Man: Son or daughter?
Red: All right, that's enough.
Eric: No, you know what? You can say anything you want about me, okay? It's not gonna bother me.
Man: Yeah, stay out of this, baldy.
Eric: Okay, you can shut up about my dad.
Man: Oh, well, who's gonna make me?
Red: I am.
Eric: No, wait, I am. [fights]
Red: Eric's in a fight. No one's here. No one's gonna believe me. Why didn't I bring my camera?

Eric: I'm vicious, all right! I will tear that ass up!
Red: Look at him go. He's got the Forman rage.

Eric: Look, Donna, your problem is you've got too much going on. I mean, the less you have going on, the less you have to worry about. Look at me. I've got nothing going on and I've got nothing to worry about.
Donna: Except your future.
Eric: Eh.

Eric: [giggles]
Hyde: Would you please quit giggling?
Eric: Sorry, man. I'm listening to George Carlin's Seven Dirty Words You Can't Say on Radio and Television. Man, he just keeps saying them over and over again. [laughs] Potty mouth.

Eric: [chuckles] You guys, I just had this brilliant idea. You know how every dirty word has a number? Instead of cursing, you could just say that number. Like I could say, "Hyde, go three yourself."

Donna: So, you see, Mr. Randall, I don't think it's necessary for me to wear a bikini. I mean, what is sexier than a little bit of mystery?
Mr. Randall: Well, according to my research, naked boobies. All right, look, ratings are down, and I think this could really help.
Donna: Well, I'm not gonna strip for a radio advertisement. It's demeaning.
Sarah: I'll do it.
Donna: You will?
Mr. Randall: Yeah, of course she'll do it. This whole billboard was her idea.
Donna: What?
Mr. Randall: Unlike some people, I care about this radio station. Plus, I just love wearing a bikini. When I put one on, I jiggle just like jelly.
Eric: Well, she jiggles just like two perfectly filled water balloons, but I'm afraid you'll never get to see them, or touch them, or make a motorboat sound with your mouth between them, because she is a lady!

Donna: Sarah, you knew that I would never do this. You were just trying to make me look bad.
Mr. Randall: And it's working. You're fired.
Donna: Wait, you're firing me because I won't strip?
Eric: No, no, you know what? I'm a gentleman, and I normally don't use this kind of language. But, Mr. Randall, you are one sixing, sevening monkey-fiver. You think your one don't stink? Well, three off, you threeing three. Come on.

Sarah: Okay, I've just been handed a hot, new record. So here's George Carlin with The Seven Dirty Words You Can't Say on Television or Radio. Huh. It seems like I almost shouldn't play it. Oh, well.
Donna: Eric, thank you so much. That was a great idea.
Eric: You're welcome. Now let's go home and five all night.